Have Faith
by Grissom1
Summary: This story begins after Sara's DUI. Another alternate universe story. Grissom struggles with his feelings for Sara while she contemplates leaving Vegas for good. A person from Grissom's past becomes a close friend to Sara despite Grissom's objections.
1. Chapter 1

**Have Faith**

"Come on, I'll take you home," said Grissom as his hand slipped into hers. She said nothing as she stood and followed like she had for years. She slid into the passenger seat and suddenly Sara felt an overwhelming sense of melancholy as she felt something come to an end.

The silence continued between them as he drove toward her apartment. As soon as the vehicle stopped, she tried to scurry away but his hand once again found hers.

"We need to talk," he urged.

It was not what she wanted nor needed at the moment but she sat there and faced him. It was the least she could do.

"Look, it's not like I…"

"You left with Nick and Warrick," he began.

She was surprised that he knew that.

"We were celebrating Nick's almost promotion," she sneered.

She regretted it the moment she said it.

The silence continued until the sound of the car door opening made him look up at her.

"It won't happen again," she confessed.

"Two weeks," he ordered. "You're going to take two weeks…see a PEAP counselor…report back to me when…"

She was already out of the seat.

She stood there with the door open.

"Sara, I have to report this to personnel. It will help if I've already…"

"Reprimanded me?" she asked between gulps of air trying miserably to keep from falling apart.

"You need a break," he replied.

"Fine."

She started to shut the door when he called out to her.

"You won't be able to return until your PEAP counselor okays it."

There was no response except the slamming of the door.

He quickly got out and hurried after her.

"Sara!"

"I get it!"

"I don't think you understand how serious this is," he warned.

"I could have lost my job tonight," she announced.

They were both quiet for a moment.

"I guess you do," he said.

"Did it ever occur to you that I don't care? I came to Vegas because…"

She stopped.

It was useless.

She would never be able to reach him.

She was letting go.

She felt a sharp pain in her chest as she struggled with her next words.

"I'm done…with the job, with Vegas, with…you."

His hand snaked out and grabbed her.

"You don't mean that," he whispered.

His words made her take a long look at him.

"What's the matter Griss? Afraid I won't come running back again? I won't! I'm done!"

"You….uhm can't….uhm…leave your job….Vegas," he exclaimed.

"You're probably right…not until I can find another job…since you didn't even bother to ask about the last declaration, I'll take it to mean you don't even care!"

He felt as if he had been slapped.

He glanced up and she was gone.

_I don't understand…_

_What happened?_

_Why is she so angry?_

Her leave request was sitting on his desk when he arrived.

He did not know when she had come and placed it there.

_Four weeks…_

_She's requesting four weeks…_

_That's more than personnel would have made her take…_

He leaned back in his chair and cursed inwardly.

"You don't look well," announced Brass as he stood in the doorway.

He glanced down at the request form.

He signed it quickly and tossed in the out basket.

"How's Sara?" asked Brass.

"She's taking some time off," he said without looking up.

"Personnel made her take two weeks. Didn't they?" asked Brass as he sat down.

"She's taking four weeks," mumbled Grissom quietly.

"Four weeks?"

Grissom looked up.

"She really isn't okay, is she? You never would have demanded that she take…"

"I didn't demand…she requested the time off," replied Grissom.

Brass stared at him.

"What the hell did you do to her? No one takes that much time off unless they're looking for another job!"

Grissom said nothing.

The same thought crossed his mind.

There was nothing he could do.

"What are you going to do?" asked Brass.

"I signed the leave request," said Grissom.

"You stupid bastard. She's finally giving up. She's tried to get you to come out of that shell all these years and now she's moving on."

Grissom grabbed for the assignments as he stood. "She needs the time off and I'm giving it to her."

"Did you even try? Did you tell her how much you care about her? You do…we all know you…"

Grissom said nothing as he stepped out of his office.

"You're a stupid son of …"

Grissom was already down the hall.

Brass shook his head.

The others were quiet as he handed out assignments.

News had spread through the office about the near DUI.

"Sara is going to be taking some time off," Grissom said finally.

"Griss, we had no idea," began Nick.

"Yeah, she seemed fine," added Warrick.

"How long?" asked Greg.

"Four weeks," answered Grissom.

The room got deafly quiet.

Grissom stood and left.

"I've never heard of personnel forcing anyone to take four weeks," whispered Catherine.

"Maybe Grissom is forcing her to take the time," explained Warrick. "Sara hasn't had a break in a long time."

"You know, I knew the Linley Parker case had gotten to her…I just didn't think…" Catherine stopped when Grissom stuck his head into the doorway.

"You've got assignments," he yelled. "I suggest you get to work."

"He's going to be a bear for the next four weeks," muttered Greg.

"Yeah, well, I don't know about the rest of you but I'm going to check in on her," declared Nick.

"Count me in," said Greg.

"Me too," chimed in Warrick.

"You know, maybe you guys should give her a week," cautioned Catherine.

"Cat may be right," said Warrick.

"One week and then I'm checking in on her," warned Nick.

Sara sat on the bar stool and glanced at the clock. She had become a recluse. She had not left the apartment since the night he had brought her home. It was not that she had wanted to confine herself to the apartment but she could not seem to stop the flow of tears that threatened each time she ventured toward the door.

She pushed the food away as she stood and began clearing the counter.

_Move on, Sara…_

_Start looking for another job…_

_Maybe in another town or San Francisco…_

She glanced around the small apartment.

This had been home for the last five years.

The tears returned.

She gulped back wave after wave.

_It's been five days…_

_It has to stop…_

He glanced toward the apartment.

It had been five days since he had driven her home and each night before shift he had parked in her apartment lot just to glance up at the building.

He stared at her car.

It remained in the same spot.

He wondered if it had even been moved.

_She hasn't seen a PEAP counselor…_

_What if something is wrong with her?_

He had requested a call from her PEAP counselor the moment she began counseling sessions. When he did not receive a call, he checked. Sara had made no appointments yet. He got out and examined her vehicle. He looked for any signs that it had been moved. He wasn't sure. He stared at her vehicle and then at the apartment.

He was standing there in front of the door within minutes.

"What do I say?" he asked himself out loud.

_Ask about the counseling…_

He tapped on the door and was surprised when she opened it.

"I've been waiting for you to start counseling," he blurted out.

She wanted to slam the door in his face but she stood there and said nothing.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

She didn't see a reason for the visit.

She had no intention of seeing a PEAP counselor.

In fact, she had spent the last hour typing up her resignation letter.

She just needed another job and then she could submit it.

He stood there and stared at her.

She swung the door wide and he entered.

He heard the door shut behind him and for the first time, he felt that his life depended on what he was about to do.

He glanced over her shoulder and could see a suitcase sitting beside the couch.

"Getting away for a few days?" he asked as his stomach twisted into knots.

"Leaving," she replied.

He swallowed hard.

"It'll be good for you to get away for awhile," he said. "You can start the counseling when you return."

She said nothing.

"Sara…"

"I should go or I'm going to be late," she seethed.

"Catching a flight?" he asked.

She did not respond.

"I could drive you," he offered.

"No, thanks."

He stared down at his feet.

"Have a good trip…be safe," he mumbled as he turned to leave.

She opened the door but quickly shut it before he could escape.

She decided she was not going to let him just disappear so easily.

"Why are you here?" she asked irritated.

"I told you…you haven't started counseling yet," he stammered.

"You could have phoned," she miffed.

"Yes, I could have but I felt it was something that should be done in person," he admitted.

"Fine. You did it. Feel better?" she yelled.

"Why are you so angry?" he asked.

"Why am I angry? Why do you think I'm so angry? God, Grissom do you have to ask? " she asked between gulps of tears.

"Sara…"

"Go away!" she yelled as she opened the door and stood there.

He took a step but then he pushed the door shut.

It was forceful and it closed with a thud.

She glared at him.

His hand snaked out and grabbed her bringing her body against his.

His lips devoured hers and for a moment she found herself retreating.

For the first time, Gil Grissom did not retreat.

With each backward step, he followed until she was pinned against the door. His tongue demanded entrance and she let him as he plunged deeper and deeper until she gasped for air. Her hands came up and rested on his chest.

"Counseling…next week," he whispered.

"No."

He cursed out loud.

Blue eyes locked with brown.

"What do you want from me?" he asked.

"I don't want anything!" she declared.

Her hands dropped to her side.

He stood there as his breathing matched hers.

He did not know what to do.

She stepped aside, folding her arms about herself.

He was free to leave.

She was no longer blocking the exit.

He couldn't leave.

He knew that as soon he did, she would be leaving and he did not have a clue as to where she was going or when she would return.

"I'll make the appointment," he offered.

"No."

"Sara!"

His hands grasped her face and he wiped away her tears.

"What do you want from me?" she asked.

"I want…you," he said in a ragged voice.

"I'm here…right here, Grissom…for now," she warned.

He understood the threat.

"I'll make the appointment for tomorrow," he said. "Go."

He glanced down at her suitcase.

He grabbed her into his arms and kissed her once more.

All of the longing and desire from the last five years were poured into that single kiss.

It was powerful and yet gentle and soft.

"Don't leave," he whispered.

He was gone before she could react.

She slid down against the door into a crumpled mess.

She had been prepared to leave.

She had mustered what little strength and dignity she had left making the arrangements to return to San Francisco to explore other options.

_He had to do this…_

_It's what you wanted…_

_You wanted him to give you a reason…_

_He just did…_

_What if he regrets it?_

She remembered another time she had submitted a leave of absence. He had sat there and scoffed at her when she told she was going to explore the federal government but then he had said the worse thing to her.

"_Sara, the lab needs you."_

She had stormed out of there, intent to pack her things that night and leave Vegas for good. She was not prepared to receive the plant. She glanced over in the corner of the room at it.

_All I have to show for five years…_

_A plant…_

_A book…_

_A kiss…_

She gulped back a sob.

_Leave Sara…._

_Grab the suitcase and leave…_

_Don't look back…_

She stared at the clock as the hands made their way around it.

She did not budge.

Her eyes shifted from the clock to the suitcase.

_Go Sara…_

_Go now…_

_Don't stay…_

_He kissed me…_

_He asked me not to leave…_

She grabbed a tennis shoe that was near the door and tossed it at the clock.

It was a direct hit and the clock crashed to the floor.

She sat there and cried.

He sat in the Denali and waited.

_Don't leave Sara…_

_Don't leave…_

_Go to counseling tomorrow…_

_Please…_

He closed his eyes.

He was tired.

In the last five days, he had slept little.

He could think about very little except Sara.

He worried about her.

She had seemed very pale and fragile.

He jumped when his phone went off.

"Grissom."

"There's a 419…a young boy," said Catherine. "Want me to cover it?"

"No, I'll be there in fifteen," he huffed.

"Gil?"

"Yeah?"

"The media is going to have a field day with this one."

"Why?"

"The boy was wearing a robe….a Catholic robe."

"Grissom?"

"Uhm yeah…I'm on my way," he replied.

Catherine said nothing as he arrived on the scene and immediately examined the body.

_Similar characteristics…_

_Not after all these years…_

_It was in California…_

_Not here…_

"Not far from the church," commented Brass.

"Have you spoken to anyone at the church?" asked Grissom.

"I thought I would let you since you're…"

"I'm not a Catholic anymore," he barked.

"Yeah, well, you know what they say. Once a…"

Grissom did not wait for him to finish as he headed off down the street on foot.

"What's wrong with him?" asked Brass to Catherine.

"I think he feels bad about forcing Sara to take time off," she whispered.

"I thought it was the other way around," replied Brass.

Catherine looked shocked.

"Sara wanted four weeks off?"

Brass said nothing as he went after Grissom on foot.

He stepped inside the church and stared at the altar. He had not stepped foot in a Catholic church ever since he had decided he no longer wished to fall to his knees. He had denounced his religion and had never looked back. His job had brought him back here once or twice but he never truly looked before. It was a beautiful church. Old Latin tumbled about inside his head and for a moment he thought they might spill forth from his mouth but clenched his jaw tight refusing to utter words of the past.

For a moment he felt an overwhelming sense of loss.

"Can I help you?" came a soft voice from behind.

"Yes, I'm…" Grissom turned and came face to face with that past.

Note from author:

Sorry it has taken me so long to post but I have been busy and well…still disgusted with CSI. The ghost hunts did not help but I am back with no scheduled trips for the rest of the year. That means I will be posting this story and perhaps another along with a Christmas story before the end of the year.

Take care,

Penny


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two**

"Hello Gil," said the priest as he stood there blocking the entrance.

Grissom stared at Father Andrew.

"Can I help you?" asked the priest.

"I would like to speak with Father Powell," said Grissom.

"He's away. I'm filling in for him," replied Father Andrew.

"I'll speak with him when he returns," said Grissom as he tried to pass him.

"That could be months."

It did not stop Grissom.

"How is your mother?" asked Father Andrew.

"She's fine," he replied as he again tried to pass.

"Gil, could I talk with you?" asked Father Andrew.

"I'm sorry. I need to get back," fumed Grissom.

"Still angry after all of these years," replied the old man sadly.

Brass entered the church and stared at the two men.

"Good," said Brass. "Someone said Father Powell was not here."

"Father Powell…" began Brass.

"He's not Father Powell. This is Andrew…"

"I'm Father Andrew. Could I help you?"

"We found a young boy dressed as an altar boy," explained Brass.

He handed Father Andrew a photo of the body.

"Do you know this boy?" asked Brass.

Father Andrew looked at the photo and sat down abruptly.

"Yes…I do. That's Ben," he said softly. "Ben Taylor. He lives just three blocks from here."

"You been here a long time?" asked Brass.

"I came here a month ago. Father Powell and I are old friends. I agreed to help out while he's away."

Brass watched as Grissom and Father Andrew exchanged glances.

"You two know one another?" asked Brass.

"Yes," answered Father Andrew as Grissom shook his head.

"I knew Andrew when I was young."

"It is Father, right?" asked Brass.

"Gil stopped calling me Father years ago, but yes, it's Father Andrew," replied the old man as he stared at the photo.

"Are you okay?" asked Brass.

"I thought I was until I saw this photo," he answered softly.

"We'll talk with the parents…"

"I'll tell her," interrupted Father Andrew. "Ben's father was killed in Iraq last year. She'll be getting off work soon. Ben usually comes here after school."

"Did he come here this evening?" asked Brass.

"I didn't see him. Sometimes, he stays at school for band practice."

"Are there other altar boys who come here after school?" asked Brass.

"Yes…there are other children as well. The parents think this is a safe place for them to hang out. The church lets them play in the basement or out back."

"Mind if we talk with the other children here?" asked Brass.

Father Andrew shook his head. "I can show you…"

"That's not necessary. I know the way to the basement," answered Grissom as he turned around.

"Gil?" called Father Andrew.

He turned and looked.

"Do you come to mass?" he asked.

"No, I don't."

"Would you come? Mass is at…"

"No thank you. I don't believe anymore."

Father Andrew gripped the back of the pew.

"You don't mean that," he said.

"If you'll excuse us, we have work to do," said Grissom as he turned and walked away.

Brass looked back as the man knelt in prayer.

"Never seen you so harsh before," said Brass. "What's the story between you two?"

Grissom glanced back. "I was an altar boy…I once worshipped him."

"Wait, you were an altar boy? He was your priest?"

Grissom continued down the stairs.

"He didn't…"

"No," answered Grissom.

"So what did he…."

Grissom opened the door and found several boys playing a game.

"Hey, have any of you seen Ben Taylor today?" asked Brass.

They shook their head.

Brass continued with the questions as Grissom stared at the pictures on the walls. Little had changed since he had been there. He had only been in the basement a few times. Father Powell had befriended him after a case. He had returned from time to time seeking Grissom's help. They had formed a friendship over time despite Grissom's refusal to come to mass.

As they left, they found Father Andrew with a young woman who sat there in tears.

Father Andrew glanced up at the two men.

"Mrs. Taylor, these are the two men working on your son's case," he announced.

Grissom stared at Andrew as Brass questioned the mother.

The old man looked away when he could no longer bear to see the hurt and anger in Grissom's eyes.

Brass and Grissom left the church and headed back to the crime scene.

Father Andrew hurried out of the church.

He called for Grissom.

"Gil, please stop," he called.

"Is there something about the case?" he asked.

"No, it's about us. Gil, I need to talk with you," he pleaded.

"There's nothing to talk about," fumed Grissom as he continued to walk away.

"Please!" implored Father Andrew as he grabbed his arm.

"Let go," warned Grissom.

"Let go of the anger my son. Don't let it consume you…"

"I am not your son and you are no father to me."

"Nothing has changed. You're still the same angry child you were when…"

He stopped when Brass stepped forward.

"Come by and we'll talk," Andrew begged.

"I have no desire to talk with you," replied Grissom.

"Emily…how is she?" he asked.

"Why don't you ask her yourself?" responded Grissom as he walked away.

"Who's Emily?" asked Brass.

"My mother."

"Oh."

He was relieved when he slipped into the Denali. He wanted nothing more than to get back to the lab putting some distance between him and Father Andrew. He was about to drive away when Brass tapped on the window.

"Yes?"

"Going to tell me the back story between you and Father Andrew?"

"No."

"Do I need to know?"

"No."

He drove away leaving Brass confused.

Grissom waited until Catherine was alone before he approached her.

"I need a favor," he said.

"Okay."

"I need you to take over the Taylor case," he announced handing her the file.

"Is there something wrong?" she asked.

"Conflict of interest," he replied.

"You know the Taylor family?" she asked.

"He was Catholic," he explained.

"Wait. You're handing off the case because of religion?" she asked.

"No, I'm handing off the case because I know the priest that was acting on behalf of Father Powell."

"A relative?" she asked.

"Catherine, take the case."

"Not going to give me anything more?"

"No."

"He's not the kind of priest that would molest and then kill young boys?" asked Catherine.

"I'll leave that for you to determine…he pretended to be a father when he wasn't."

His words shocked and baffled her.

She wanted to ask more but Grissom had already turned and left.

Brass walked in and watched Grissom disappear down the hall.

"Hey, did he say anything about the autopsy on Ben Taylor?" asked Brass.

"I'll find out for you. He just assigned the case to me," grumbled Catherine.

"Since when does Grissom hand off cases he's worked first hand?"

"Since he doesn't like a certain priest that's involved," grumbled Catherine.

"Did he tell you why he doesn't like Father Andrew?"

"Not really. You know, I've never seen him like this," admitted Catherine.

"Me either."

Note from author:

Thanks to all of my readers who have returned to read this story. I have missed you! Please continue to leave a review so we can move forward. As always, a new chapter will be posted each day...perhaps more.

Take care,

Penny


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

The amber liquid swirled around in his glass as he took a sip. He had come home and pulled out the bottle as soon as his keys hit the counter. He glanced at his phone when it went off. He did not wish to be disturbed. He took another sip letting the liquid burn his throat.

His phone continued to ring and he cursed as he flipped it open.

"Grissom."

"Autopsy revealed Ben Taylor was strangled to death. Why didn't you tell me there were similar murders in California twenty years ago?" asked Catherine.

"It's your case. You needed to confirm the cases were alike," he replied.

"Is there something wrong?" asked Catherine.

"Is there?" asked Grissom.

"Okay, you don't sound fine. Is it this case or the fact that a certain brunette is on leave?" asked Catherine.

"Anything else? About the Taylor case?" he asked.

"I guess there's nothing else…except a phone message for you…Sara scheduled an appointment with her PEAP…sorry it was marked urgent and I thought you should know…is she okay?" asked Catherine.

"The guys have been trying to call her but she doesn't answer. The message from her PEAP counselor sounded like it was an emergency. She scheduled an appointment for this evening," said Catherine.

Grissom set the glass down.

"Anything else?" he asked.

"Did you hear me?" she asked.

"Keep me informed about the Taylor case," he answered as he hung up.

_She made an appointment…_

_An emergency appointment…_

He flipped open his phone as his fingers poised over the button.

One click and he would dial her number.

He closed the phone.

_Tomorrow…_

_I'll check tomorrow._

Grissom stepped into the office.

It was the first time he was anxious to review his messages.

He flipped through them and found the message from the PEAP counselor. He understood Catherine's concern. It had the appearance of an investigator in trouble but he already knew that. He rummaged through the new ones and found another one from the counselor. He quickly shut his door and called.

"Gil Grissom for Mrs. Randolph," he requested.

"Mr. Grissom. Your CSI Sara Sidle met with me last night."

"Is she okay?" he asked.

"It's good that she's taking some time off," she replied.

"Is she okay?" he asked again.

"I'm not sure if she's receptive to counseling…she's going to meet with me again today," she responded.

"Why so soon?" he asked. "She met with you last night."

"It's just a precaution…when investigators request an emergency session we like to follow up immediately to make sure things have calmed down."

"Is she okay?" he asked for the third time.

"Mr. Grissom, how long have you known Ms. Sidle?" she asked.

"Years…six years," he stated. "She's been employed with the lab for five…I knew her in San Francisco."

"What do you know about her past?" she asked.

"Past?" he asked.

"You sent her for counseling because she almost received a DUI," she stated.

"She doesn't have a drinking problem," he announced with confidence.

"What do you think is the problem?" she asked.

_Me…._

_I'm the problem…_

_I should be in counseling…_

"She's tired…on the verge of burn out. She just needs some time off," he stated.

"Why did you insist on counseling?" she asked.

"She almost received a DUI…counseling is part of the office procedure for handling…"

"You said she didn't have a drinking problem," she countered.

"She doesn't," Grissom said sounding irritated.

"I'll keep you informed of her appointments," replied Mrs. Randolph.

He closed the phone.

He had gotten little or no information except that she had seen her PEAP counselor.

It would have to do.

He seemed to go through the motions that shift.

He said little to the others even though there was plenty of small talk.

He listened to them.

The conversation centered on Sara.

It seemed she had cut herself off from the others.

"I'm going over there," said Nick to Greg.

"I went by there before shift. She was gone," grumbled Greg.

_Maybe she just wasn't opening the door…_

"Was her car there?" asked Warrick.

"No…I'm telling you she's left town," whined Greg.

The coffee cup slipped from Grissom's hand and crashed into the sink.

Heads turned.

He said nothing as he rinsed it out and then left.

"You think Grissom knows something?" asked Nick.

"Grissom? Why would he know anything? It's his fault she's gone for four weeks," muttered Greg.

"I heard Sara requested the leave," said Catherine.

All heads turned toward Catherine.

"What do you know?" asked Greg.

"Nothing…and if I did, I'm not telling," she said as she got up and walked out quickly.

"I'm telling you something is going on," whispered Nick. "I'm worried about her."

Grissom drove by her apartment.

Her car was gone.

He cursed.

_She wouldn't leave…_

_She has another counseling appointment…_

He found himself retreating to the lab.

He stepped into his office shutting the door behind him.

He checked his message and found none from the counselor.

_Sara, where are you?_

Sara sat there in her car.

She had no idea why she was there.

She did not know Debbie Marlin personally.

She had not wanted to know her.

_I had Catherine do the interview…_

_I couldn't sit there and listen to her describe how she had been raped…_

_I didn't want to hear…_

She leaned back and closed her eyes.

_We couldn't even protect her…_

_We let the suspect go based on the evidence…_

_That bastard raped her a second time…._

_Then killed her…_

_Where is the justice?_

She stepped out of the car and into the chapel.

She had been in a Catholic church before.

She and Grissom had been in this very one…

_Father Powell...._

_He tried to convince Grissom that a young man was innocent…_

_He was right…_

_He was framed by his brother…_

_The D.A wouldn't listen and the man was convicted…._

_He later killed himself…_

_I don't think Grissom ever forgave himself…._

She sat near the back.

The family was huddled in the front four pews.

She listened to the service as she glanced around.

She ducked down when Grissom entered from the other side.

His eyes scanned the pews.

She turned in hopes that he would not see her.

She was relieved when there was a moment of prayer.

She felt herself kneeling.

_When in Rome…_

She sensed his presence even before he sat down beside her.

The prayer ended and she returned to her seat.

Her thigh brushed up against his and she reacted as if she had been burned. She slowly edged away only to have Grissom pull her back until their bodies sat intimately close.

Neither said a word as they listened to the mass.

She felt uncomfortable.

She turned slightly and noticed that Grissom's eyes were on her rather than the priest.

As soon as the service ended, she felt his hand on hers and he pulled her along beside him.

He did not stop until they were in front of her car.

"I didn't know you were Catholic," he accused.

"You and I both know that I'm not," she admitted.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"Linley Parker…she was Catholic…it was her memorial service," she said matter of fact.

It was the same reason he had come.

She turned and opened her car door.

"I spoke with your PEAP counselor," he blurted out.

"It figures," she replied.

"She said you had another appointment for today…did you go?" he asked.

She said nothing.

"Why not?" he asked.

She started to get into the car when he stopped her.

"Reschedule the appointment," he almost pleaded.

"No."

"So, we're back to that again," he seethed.

"I did it. I went. I'm not going back," she declared.

"Sara, you can't just go to one appointment and then…"

"Yes, I can. It doesn't matter to me…fire me," she spat out.

His hand caught hers.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked.

"Why are we doing this?" she asked. "We're told to trust the evidence….what good did that do Linley Parker? She did everything we asked her to do….and all she asked of us was to protect her. We let him go so he could rape and kill her. Where is the justice? Where is the justice for her?"

"We arrested him…he's facing the death penalty. Sara, we did everything we possibly could."

"I know. Is that supposed to make it feel any better? To know that no matter what, we weren't good enough," she said as she swiped her eyes.

"Is this the reason you met with the counselor last night?" he asked.

She glared at him.

"No."

He waited for her to tell him the reason but she did not offer it as she slipped into the car and drove away.

He stood there wrestling with the urge to go after her.

He turned and came face to face with Father Andrew.

"Gil…it's good to see you," he said.

"If you'll excuse me, I have to get back to the office," he stated.

"So I take it, this was a business call rather than a religious one?" he asked.

"Yes, it was," replied Grissom.

"I'd like to talk with you," he urged. "Come by tomorrow…"

"I'm busy," said Grissom.

"I'll come to your office," he offered.

"I'll be in the field," said Grissom.

"Gil, please," he said as his hand came up and rested on Grissom's arm.

"Tell Father Powell, I'll come by when he returns," said Grissom as he left.

Father Andrew stood there helplessly.

He returned to the sanctuary of the lab.

A message appeared in his basket.

"Dr. Randolph, you called….about Sara Sidle," he said anxiously.

"She didn't come. She had an appointment with me at 4:00 p.m. I've not been able to reach her," reported Dr. Randolph.

"She met with me," he lied.

"With you?"

"Yes…we attended a memorial service," he replied.

It wasn't a complete lie.

"I see…well, she just needs to reschedule…she's willing to do that, isn't she?" asked Dr. Randolph.

"Yes," he answered.

He clicked the phone off.

_Of course, she isn't…_

_She has no intention of going…_

_She's probably back to her original plan…_

_Leave town…_

Note from author:

I've really enjoyed the reviews. I am happy to see familiar names as well as a few new ones. Please continue to leave a review. By the way, the story only contains about 21 chapters…yeah I know. I'm writing shorter stories now. LOL

Take care,

Penny


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

He grabbed his jacket and practically ran out the door.

He did not even stop to talk with Brass as he hurried past him.

_Be at home Sara…_

_Be at home…_

_Don't leave…_

_Stay…_

He sighed out loud when he saw her car parked in front of the apartment.

He knocked before he could think about his actions.

"You again," she sighed.

"Reschedule the appointment," he said.

"No."

"Why not?" he asked.

"Why should I?" she asked.

"Sara…"

"I'm not going back," she announced.

"What happened?" he asked.

"You go," she said.

"I didn't get pulled over," he retorted.

She said nothing as she turned and headed toward the kitchen.

She opened her refrigerator wide.

"See any beer?" she asked. "Let's check the cabinets!"

Her hand pulled open the first door but his hand was already on it.

"Stop," he ordered.

"Check for yourself," she fumed. "There is no alcohol in the apartment…unless you count the mouth rinse."

"I never believed…"

She slammed the cabinet door.

"You have to meet with your counselor in order to return to work," he explained.

"Who says I'm coming back," she huffed.

He stared at her.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

"I'm still looking," she lied.

"You're uhm good at your job," he said softly.

"I know. The lab needs me," she mocked.

His jaw twitched.

She closed her eyes and leaned against the cabinet.

Her head hurt.

She did not want to fight.

She was startled when his hand caressed her cheek.

Her eyes shot open as they stood there face to face.

"Chalk," he whispered.

She felt a lump in her throat.

"Reschedule the appointment," he begged softly.

She shook her head.

"Sara!"

He cursed as he pulled her into his arms holding her tight.

His lips kissed her forehead.

For a brief moment, she let herself enjoy the feel of his arms around her.

She knew not to expect anything more and was not surprised when he stepped back breaking the contact.

She sighed.

Sometimes she hated being right.

"You don't have a drinking problem…you're just burning out," he stated. "You've been pushing yourself too hard. Taking time off will help. Get out…find a hobby…a diversion."

"I think I've heard this lecture before," she stammered stepping away from him.

"You never got one," he said.

"Yes…I did. It just never worked," she replied.

"What was your diversion?" he asked.

She did not reply as she fumbled with the envelope on the counter.

It was her resignation.

He watched her toy with the envelope and his stomach lurched.

_It's her resignation…_

_She's really going to leave…_

"Look, take a vacation…go somewhere," he said nervously.

He felt the sweat bead on his forehead.

His pulse raced at the thought of her leaving town but then he told himself she would come back.

_Wouldn't she?_

His eyes followed hers to the suitcase still sitting there by the couch.

She had never moved it.

"Good…go…it would do you some good," he urged.

He glanced at the suitcase once again.

"Where were you thinking about going?" he asked.

"San Francisco…for a job interview," she admitted.

"Don't go!"

A slight grin crossed her face but disappeared as she bit her lower lip.

Her eyes shot to the suitcase and then she boldly folded her arms and stared directly at him.

"Why not?"

"Because…I…need…you," he whispered.

Her eyes shot to the floor.

"You can replace me…I'm sure you will find someone to hire," she responded.

"I don't want…anyone… but you," he countered.

"Why?"

"Sara, please!"

She took in a ragged breath and released it.

"I'm so tired Grissom. What do you want from me?" she choked out.

He was there pulling her into his arms once more as he kissed her.

It felt different this time.

It was seductive and urgent and she wasn't quite sure but she thought for a moment that Gil Grissom had swiped at his own eyes.

"Reschedule the appointment…just a couple of appointments and then you'll be released," he pleaded. "You can come back to work…with me…don't leave."

"Just a couple of appointments…then back to work…with you," she repeated.

"Yes," he said quickly.

Her heart screamed yes but her mind said no.

"I can't," she heard herself say.

It hurt to breathe at that moment as she watched his reaction.

"Tell me…what you want?" he whispered.

"Don't you know?" she asked.

_I want you Grissom…_

"Tell me how to fix this?" he asked.

"I can't," she said as she gulped for air.

_You have to do this Grissom…_

_I can't do this anymore…_

_It's now or never…_

He breathed in deeply as if he was having trouble forcing air into his lungs.

His hands slipped down her shoulders and rested on her waist. He pulled her body tight against his. His right hand slipped underneath the cotton blouse. She held her breath when she felt his hands on her breasts.

She stood there motionless as she let him touch her.

She was not prepared when his head dipped down and kissed her right breast.

She tensed for a moment but held on as she felt his desire rising.

His head rested on her shoulder.

Her fingers stroked his head as if comforting a child.

"Please Sara," he managed to get out.

It hurt to hear him beg.

She nodded slowly feeling a sharp pain in her chest.

She was giving in.

Her head warned her.

She ignored it as she let herself hold him.

Her hands gently caressed his back.

"I'll go," she managed to get out.

His head lifted from her shoulder.

His lips sought hers. She tingled when she felt his tongue part her lips and she accepted him into her soul once more. The kiss lingered as she rested fully against him.

Suddenly, he released her and stepped back.

"I should go," he said trying to recover. "I have to be at the lab."

She said nothing as she heard the door open and then shut.

He was gone.

Sara breathed out.

_What have you done, Sara?_

_He can break you this time…_

_And he will…_

_He'll turn and run when you return to work…_

She gulped.

Her phone went off and it startled her.

She glanced and saw that it was Grissom.

"Sidle," she managed to get out.

"You have an appointment for this evening…I scheduled it for you," he said. "5:00 p.m."

She bit her lip and tasted blood.

"Sara?"

"I'll be there," she managed to get out.

She didn't know where she was going. She had gone to the appointment, put on her best performance and then cursed when she was asked to return for a follow up the next day. She had come home, tossed on a pair of sweats and took off jogging. She had not intended to go very far but now she found herself across town. She slowed down to a walking pace and tried to breathe slowly checking her pulse.

She glanced down the alley and saw the priest as he stood there staring at the ground. As she approached, she realized the area had once been a crime scene.

He looked up.

"I'm sorry did you know Ben?" he asked quietly.

"No, I didn't. I read about it in the papers," she replied.

He stared at the ground.

"Is there something wrong?" she asked.

"He was a good boy," he said. "I never understand when a child dies…only God knows."

He leaned against the brick building.

"Are you alright…Father?" she asked.

The word seemed odd coming from her mouth.

"I'm sorry…just tired," he admitted. "I should get back. I just wanted to come here…bless this place."

She glanced at him and saw that his face was colorless.

"I'll uhm walk with you…if you don't mind," she asked.

"That would be nice," he said. "I'm Father Andrew."

He extended his hand and she took it.

It was warm.

"Sara…Sidle," she announced.

"Ah, Sara, what are you doing in an alley?" he asked.

"Curiosity," she said.

Small talk began.

Sara seemed at ease with him.

He talked about California.

"You have family here?" asked Sara.

"I'm covering for Father Powell," he explained. "I do know someone…I knew him when he was a child."

Sara's head shot around.

"Did he used to be an altar boy?" asked Sara.

"Yes, he was."

"So what does an altar boy become when he grows up?" she asked.

"Supervisor of a crime lab," he announced.

Sara swallowed.

Note from author:

Thanks for being so faithful and leaving a review for each chapter. I was tempted to post another chapter today…

Take care,

Penny


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

"Did he investigate the death of that child…Ben?" asked Sara.

"Yes," he answered. "But I'm not sure he's kept the case…some officer, Brass, I think, said I was to report any further information to a person by the name of Willows. I didn't expect Gil to keep the case once he saw me."

"I thought you were friends?" she asked.

"We had a falling out years ago. I did something and he never forgave me," he explained.

He stopped and looked at her.

"You ask a lot of questions," he said.

"Sorry. I just came from counseling where I was grilled…just turning the tables I suppose," she said looking away.

"I counsel…people…sometimes it's best to let people talk…not ask so many questions…you find out more," he shared as he sat down on a bench.

Sara followed.

"Do you like counseling?" he asked.

"It sucks…sorry Father," she said feeling embarrassed.

He chuckled. "Nothing like honesty. Is it helping?"

"No."

"Why do you go?"

"It's a requirement…if I want to keep my job."

"Oh."

"I uhm had too much to drink one night…got picked up…I was lucky that I wasn't charged…I have to go to counseling for awhile…make sure I can do my job," she explained feeling embarrassed for the admission.

"What do you do?" he asked.

She stared at him.

_He's a priest…._

_Do you really want to lie?_

"City employee," she replied.

"I can see how the DUI charge could have ended your career," he answered.

"I don't have a drinking problem," she said quickly.

"No, you don't," he sympathized.

"How…did you know?" she asked.

"We passed a liquor store along with a bar and you never glanced in their direction. An alcoholic would have looked."

She nodded.

She stared into his blue eyes and smiled.

He was nice.

"You feel guilty for getting stopped but you're angry because you feel you've been labeled," he said taking her hand.

He was a stranger and yet she let him hold her hand.

"You're very observant," she breathed.

"I've done this for many years," he countered.

"Ever tried to work out the problem with your friend?" she asked.

"He's still angry," he sighed.

"How could someone hold a grudge…"

"I'd known Gil's parents even before he was born. His mother and I were friends. We grew up together," he stopped and leaned back as if his back was hurting. "She married Gerald Grissom and they soon had Gil. They were regulars…for nine years I watched Gil grow. He became an altar boy at a very young age. He was able to recite Latin faster than some of us priests," Father Andrew grinned.

He glanced at Sara.

"It was good to see her happy….but then Gerald died of a heart attack…it broke Gil's heart. It broke hers. He stayed in his room for days…wouldn't speak to anyone…His mother came to me. She had very few friends…not everyone knew sign language or was willing to learn."

"Emily was deaf?" she asked quickly.

"She lost her hearing…it wasn't an accident…she'd known there was a possibility all of her life," he explained. "When I found out about her condition, we learned sign language so we could still communicate. It was our secret way of talking to one another without many understanding. Gerald was such a good man…Gil seemed lost after his father's death. He began spending time alone…going to the beach…finding corpses of animals and performing autopsies. I think he was trying to figure out…life and death…I kept a close eye on him. He was fascinated with how things worked," he said.

He chuckled. "I'll never forget the day Emily came rushing into the church yard. I thought something had happened to Gil. She told me she had found him with a cat…cutting it up…he was dissecting it. She thought Gil needed help. I helped her to understand that it was natural…Gil was going to be a doctor someday," he said. "By the way, he figured out the cat died of old age."

"When did he get angry with you?" she asked.

The priest looked down at the ground.

"I did something…he couldn't forgive me," he stated.

She stared at him.

"Why were you drinking that night?" he asked.

"What?"

"My turn," he gestured.

"I uhm got passed over for a promotion," she said simply.

"You don't fit the type that would…"

"I'm not," she admitted. "I've been in love with someone for five years but he won't have a relationship with me."

"Why?"

"His job."

Father Andrew nodded.

She looked at him. "You loved Emily, didn't you?"

"I loved God more," he said. "I'd always known I was going to be a priest. Emily did too. She tried to hide her feelings. I pretended I didn't notice them. We hurt each other in the process. I finally decided that I needed to move to a different parish…prepare for the final step of becoming a priest. She was heartbroken but she wished me well…it was then her hearing began to fail. She was frightened. She practically became a recluse in her own home. Her mother wrote to me….I returned. I didn't recognize the same girl I had fallen in love with. I uhm was supposed to take my vows …I couldn't do it. I was worried about her. She wouldn't see me for days. I didn't know how to get through to her so I decided to use honesty. I admitted how much I loved her. For a brief time, I didn't hide my feelings. I let myself really love her…I've never been that happy again."

"But you became a priest and she married Gerald. Why?"

"We were walking home one evening…when there was an accident. A young man was wounded…he was dying. The police had called for a priest but I knew he wouldn't get there in time so I gave him his last rites. She stood there while I held his hand and helped him pass peacefully. The next day, she told me she was going to a special school to learn to read lips. I thought it was a great idea. She sent me a letter a few weeks later…told me I was meant to be a priest…she was going to marry Gerald," he grieved.

Sara gripped his hand.

"Gerald knew Emily's father. He often came to their house for business purposes. Emily's father was a professor while Gerald was a botanist. He was immediately attracted to Emily. He never hid his feelings…not like me."

"It must have been hard for you…to see her with someone else," she whispered.

"There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about her," he admitted. "It was my sacrifice."

He looked at her.

"Sometimes the best way to love someone is to let them go," he said.

Sara nodded. "It hurts," she gulped.

"Yes…it does," he admitted. "If your counselor tells you time heals all wounds…then you know she or he has never really loved before."

He stood. "Thank you Sara…for listening. I'm here…at least for a few months. Come by and visit."

She watched as he walked toward the church.

"Father Andrew?" she called.

He turned and looked at her.

"See you tomorrow," she offered.

He smiled. "I'll hold you to that."

Grissom rushed through his messages. He was relieved when he saw that she had kept her appointment. He leaned back in his chair and tried not to yawn.

"Dead end on the Ben Taylor case," announced Catherine as she stood at his door.

"Keep me informed…at least the media hasn't picked up on the similarities to the cases in California," said Grissom.

Catherine stared at him. "You uhm sick? You don't look well."

"I'm fine," he replied.

"Funny, that's Sara's line. Speaking of Sara…"

"Were we?" he asked as he shuffled the papers around on his desk.

"Stop pretending to be concerned about the paper on your desk so you can avoid me. Have you heard from Sara? The guys are worried. They haven't been able to reach her."

"She's on leave…to get away from this place," he said.

"You think she's okay?" she asked.

"She's fine," he replied.

Catherine looked at him. "If you didn't look like shit, I'd believe you."

He gawked but she turned and walked away.

He didn't come to her apartment.

She didn't expect him.

She had given him what he wanted.

She had kept the counseling appointment.

She stared at the take out menu on her fridge.

She pulled it off and threw it on the counter grabbing her wallet as she headed out the door.

She jumped into her car and drove to the small café.

She knew there would be little chance of running into anyone she knew.

Sara walked in and stopped suddenly.

Father Andrew was sitting at the far end of the diner.

He looked up and smiled.

"Not following you….I promise," she said.

"Come sit with me…unless you're meeting someone," he smiled.

"No…just decided to come and dine rather than have it delivered," she said.

"Eat here often?" he asked.

"No…never," she replied as she grabbed a menu.

"I guess we'll have to try it together," he said with a grin.

She glanced up and down the menu finally settling on a salad.

His eyes glanced over his glasses.

"Salad?" he asked.

"Vegetarian," she explained.

"I see. Do you mind if I…"

"Won't bother me," she assured him.

"Good…cause I sort of like meat and potatoes," he announced.

Sara nodded.

Hours later they still sat there talking.

Sara had forced herself to eat a dessert.

She liked the conversation and knew she would find nothing but an empty apartment when she returned.

"I've kept you long enough," he sighed. "I should go."

"This was good," she said as she grabbed for the check but his hand caught hers and they laughed.

"It's mine this time," he grinned.

"Tomorrow…I'll get it," she said.

"Is that what they call a date?" asked the priest.

Sara grinned.

"Thank you Sara. I've enjoyed the conversation," he said standing.

They stepped outside.

"Want a lift?" she asked.

He glanced down the block and then smiled. "That would be nice."

She stopped in front of the church.

"Would you like to come in?" asked Father Andrew.

"What a date and now you're asking me in?" she teased.

"It's my favorite time," he shared. "It's so peaceful at this hour."

He stepped out of the car. "Come with me, Sara."

She did.

She had no idea why.

She didn't particularly believe in God.

She had seen too much horror in her life to think that a God existed.

She was intrigued with Father Andrew.

He was a direct link to Grissom.

She had learned more about Grissom in one day than she had in the six years she had known him.

They stepped inside and their footsteps echoed.

"There's no one here," she whispered.

"There's always someone here," he countered.

"You're speaking spiritually, right?"

He sat down in the pew and she joined him.

"You uhm didn't tell me the rest of the story," she said.

"If I did that then we wouldn't have anything to talk about tomorrow," he retorted.

She frowned. "You remind me of someone…he avoids questions also."

"Do you have a counseling session tomorrow?" he asked.

"Yes, I do," she admitted.

"You really don't like to talk about your past," he said.

"I don't like talking to a stranger who can influence whether I can work or not," she miffed.

"You don't seem to have a problem talking with me," he said.

"No, I don't," she said. "I should be going."

He waved as she slipped out of the pew and disappeared.

Note from author:

Please continue to leave a review and yes, I will probably post another chapter today. By the way, the ending is very, very long so there will definitely be more than twenty one chapters…perhaps twenty five.

Take care,

Penny


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six:**

Sara sat there and stared at the counselor.

She had given short concise answers.

Dr. Randolph looked at her.

"Sara, counseling is for you," Dr. Randolph reminded her.

"I thought it was to determine whether I can return to work," she replied.

"Yes, it is…but you could benefit from it if you would…"

"Look, I never should have stopped and had another drink," she seethed.

"Why did you?"

_Because I didn't want to go home to an empty apartment…_

_Because I was hurt for being rejected by Grissom personally and professionally…_

"I've not touched a drink since that night," she insisted. "I don't have a drinking problem."

"What do you have a problem with?" she asked.

_You…_

_You want me to spill my soul…_

_I'm not going to…_

"Is this the first time you've been in counseling?" she asked.

"The department has never sent me…"

"I didn't ask that. Have you ever been in counseling?"

_When I was in foster care…_

_I learned to say nothing…_

She looked directly at the counselor.

"No, I've never needed counseling as an adult," she replied.

"As a child?"

_Careful Sara…_

"Never needed it then," she answered.

Dr. Randolph stared at her.

Sara stared back.

"Were you ever sent to counseling?" asked Dr. Randolph.

"What does this have to do with the DUI?" asked Sara sounding irritated.

"You seem to have a problem with domestic violence cases…and rape cases," she said.

"Who doesn't?" shot back Sara. She grew angry since she knew that information had been given to the counselor by Grissom.

Dr. Randolph scribbled some notes.

"I'll make a deal with you, Sara. I'll give you the recommendation to go back to work if you will come back to counseling and leave the bullshit at the door," she retorted.

"It's not bullshit," Sara said with arms folded.

"Is it a deal?" she asked.

"Fine," she shot back.

Dr. Randolph handed her the letter.

"Shouldn't you send that to Grissom?" asked Sara.

"I want you to see what it says," she said.

Sara flipped open the letter.

"It just says I can return to work."

"Exactly. I didn't mention that you went to counseling as a child and that you're resistant to discuss the reason. That's between you and me," said Dr. Randolph.

Sara blinked.

"How about tomorrow?" she asked.

Sara nodded as she hurried out the room.

She should have dropped off the letter at the lab. It was still early and there was little chance she would run into anyone but yet she found herself driving to the townhouse. She had been inside once before when they were working a serial murder case.

She took a deep breath when she knocked on the door.

When he did not answer, she thought to leave the letter inside the door.

She reached out and placed it inside the crack of the door when it shot open.

They glanced down at the letter now on the floor.

"Is that your resignation?" he asked.

"It's Dr. Randolph's recommendation that I can return to work," she announced.

She bent down to get it but he was already there and he grabbed it.

He noticed the envelope was not sealed.

"I'm surprised she gave it to you…like this," he said.

He opened it and read it quickly.

"Expecting to read more? Like why I decided to drink?" she asked sounding angry.

"No, I'm…"

He didn't finish.

They both stared at one another.

It was awkward.

There was no invite into his home.

_That would be too personal…_

_Letting me inside his home, his life…_

She turned and headed toward her car.

"Sara, wait," he called.

She did not stop until she felt his hand on her arm.

"You requested four weeks…you still have leave. Dr. Randolph said you could return immediately. What do you want to do?" he asked.

_I want to find another job far, far away…_

"What do you want?" she asked.

He looked confused.

"Take the time… if you need it," he offered.

She said nothing as she opened her car door.

"The guys miss you at the lab," he blurted out.

"Good to be missed," she shot back as she drove away.

She glanced down at her watch and cursed.

She was late.

She hurried inside the café and found Father Andrew sitting there.

"Sorry…I had something I had to do," she explained.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"No, I'm not. I'm not sure how much company I will be this evening," she admitted.

"Want to skip dinner?" he asked.

"I skipped breakfast and lunch," she chuckled.

"We should feed you then," he said.

Dinner came and went.

They took a walk in the park finding a bench to sit.

"I take it counseling did not go well," he said.

"I can return to work," she announced.

"But you don't want to?" he asked.

"I'm not sure," she admitted.

"Does your job bother you?" he asked.

"Sometimes," she stammered.

She turned to face him.

"I should go," she said.

"Come and see me again?" he asked.

"Yes," she replied.

"Thank you Sara. I value your friendship," he stated.

"Night Father," she said as she headed toward her car.

She spent every evening with Father Andrew.

One evening, he had made vegetarian lasagna for her at his small apartment near the church.

They had sat and talked for hours.

She laughed at his stories about Grissom's antics as a young boy.

It was a good distraction from Grissom and counseling.

Counseling had become painful.

"Sara, you should tell Mr. Grissom about your past. It would explain why you have such a difficult time with domestic violence cases," urged Dr. Randolph.

"I'm not sure I can," she whispered.

"Would you like for me…"

"No! I'll do it," she professed.

"Good."

One evening she walked into the church and sat down.

She saw Father Andrew sitting with a young woman.

She seemed distraught.

Sara watched as his arm gently held her as he leaned forward and prayed.

She felt bad for sitting there and observing such a private moment.

The woman soon left and she found him kneeling at the altar.

He sat down as if he was out of breath and she immediately came forward.

"Father Andrew?" she asked softly.

"I decided to take that mile hike around the park this evening. My bones are telling me, I am too old for such foolishness," he grimaced.

He looked at her and smiled.

"Nothing to be worried about Sara," he said as he reached out and pulled her down beside him.

"You're early," he said. "It's nice to see you here…in the church."

"I uhm can't have dinner," she said. "I'm returning to work."

"I see," he said. "Do you think you're ready?"

"No," she admitted.

"Then why?"

"Because I need my work," she explained.

"Like I need this," he said extending his hands.

"Yes."

"You work at night?" he asked.

"Yes. Father, I need to tell you something. I work…"

They were interrupted by a young man standing nearby.

"I think I have work to do," he whispered. "Be safe tonight. Let me know you're okay."

"Lunch…we could do lunch," she offered.

"You know where to find me," he said.

She started to leave but then stopped.

"Wait, sometimes I have to pull doubles…if I don't show…"

He was already with the young man.

She sat there and stared into the mirror in her locker.

She tried to rehearse what she would say.

_I don't have a drinking problem…_

_I have a 'me' problem…_

_My PEAP counselor suggested I talk with you…_

_God Grissom, you're part of the problem…_

She had suddenly called him up an hour before shift and left a voice message that she would be at work that night.

Greg popped in to introduce a new lab person.

She smiled even though she suddenly felt she had made a mistake by returning so soon.

Just the mere walking through the motions in the lab caused her to want to flee to the nearest exit.

She was glad when she saw Grissom.

She was ready.

She needed to explain so much to him.

She knew he wanted to know.

It was the reason he was so angry at the recommendation letter. The counselor had given him no information about her problems.

Now, Sara was ready and willing to tell him everything.

She waited as he handed out the assignments and the others left before speaking.

"Could we talk?" she asked.

"You still meeting with your PEAP counselor?" he asked.

"Yes."

A commotion was heard in the next room as something was dropped.

He glanced at Sara.

"You're busy…it can wait," she said.

"You sure?" he asked.

She nodded.

He seemed distant.

She wasn't surprised.

She did not expect him to act differently.

She sighed as the shift ended and she was not able to speak with him.

Shifts came and went.

She managed to meet with Father Andrew between doubles.

Grissom did not seem to notice her as he seemed to throw himself into his work.

Her actions soon got his attention.

"Sara, stand up slowly and move away from the closet," warned Warrick.

She ignored the request as she continued to get the door off its hinges.

Warrick grabbed her and it was then she saw the pipe bombs.

"I'm not leaving this door," she declared. "It has evidence on it."

Warrick knew she wasn't about to leave without the door.

They worked quickly to remove it.

She sat there now in the lab swabbing the door for evidence.

"So what were you trying to prove with this door?" asked Grissom.

"I was just collecting evidence," said Sara.

"Well Greg couldn't pull any DNA from the bones so there's nothing to connect the victim to this anyway," said Grissom sounding angry.

"Not yet. I don't have a death wish and I'm not a drunk in case you were worried," she retorted.

He was surprised she had mentioned the drinking once more.

"I'm not worried. I'm concerned," said Grissom looking away as if to see if anyone else was listening to the conversation.

She sat there at the end of shift watching the old home movies of a man and his son.

She saw how the father introduced the son to pipe bombs.

It sickened her.

_Like father like son…_

_Son is a product of his parents…_

_Sick anti social…_

She swallowed hard.

_I am not like my parents…_

_I will not be like my parents…_

She sat there quietly in the pew.

She did not even notice when he appeared.

Father Andrew sat down beside her.

"I've missed you," he said.

"I've been working," she replied.

His hand rested on hers.

She swiped at her tears.

"Do you think…children born to violent parents will become violent also?" she asked.

"I think a child's environment affects how a child chooses to live his or her life," he answered.

"Do you think…a child could be violent just because his parents are violent?" she asked.

"No."

She leaned back.

"I saw these old home movies of this kid and his father…"she stopped.

"Is this part of your job?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Father Andrew, I need to tell you something," she said.

She cursed when her beeper went off.

"Sorry…I have to go," she groaned.

"Sara, are you alright?" he asked holding tight to her hand.

"Yes…I am," she lied as she gently slipped her hand from his and then left.

Note from author:

Yeah, the plot thickens. Please continue with the reviews.

Take care,

Penny


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

She worked by his side.

It was a case in which time was of the essence.

A young girl had been abducted.

They rummaged through the young girl's bedroom.

"I bet you were a smart seventh grader," said Grissom.

Her head shot up but she said nothing more and returned to work. It was actually something nice for a change and she was not sure how to take it. The evidence led them to the terminally ill brother.

He had killed his sister in order to prevent his parents from making him go through treatment once again. The young man had wanted to die to escape the pain but his parents refused to let go using his sister's body as a means of keeping him alive. He watched as they were ready to take away his sister's dreams in order to save him. He chose to end her life.

Grissom and Sara drove up to the church.

She felt nervous.

As they approached the entrance, she stopped.

Grissom turned and looked at her.

He could see that she was upset about something.

"I can do this," he offered. "If you want to stay out here."

She nodded quickly.

He glanced at her but then proceeded to go inside with the officer. Grissom found Daniel sitting in one of the pews. Grissom confronted him with the evidence. He was not prepared for the young man's confession.

"I couldn't watch her suffer anymore," said Daniel Perez.

"This wasn't a mercy killing, Daniel. This was an execution. Bone marrow, transfusions…that's her blood in your veins," said Grissom. "It dripped out of your nose onto the blanket while you were killing her. If you cared so much for Alicia, why didn't you take your own life instead of hers?"

"Suicide isn't an option. It's an unforgivable sin in the eyes of God," said Daniel.

"But you believe your God forgives murder? If that's your defense, it won't keep you out of jail."

"But my death will. See, I've got six more months. I'll be dead before there's even a trial."

Grissom stared at the tear streaked face of the young man.

"I uhm do want to thank you, though," said Daniel.

"For what?" asked Grissom.

"For speaking for Alicia. You're probably the first person in her life to think only of her. You know, you may not believe in God, sir, but you do his work."

The young man's words unnerved him.

Grissom watched as the young man was led out by the officer.

Father Andrew appeared.

Their eyes met briefly before Grissom headed to the door.

Sara leaned against the wall as she watched the young boy being placed inside the police car.

Grissom stepped outside and took Sara by the arm.

They stopped when they heard Father Andrew's voice.

"Gil!"

Grissom turned with Sara.

Father Andrew looked surprised.

"Sara?" he asked.

Grissom's head shot to Sara.

"I uhm…"

"You work with Gil?" Father Andrew asked.

"Yes, I do," she said.

"You know one another?" asked Grissom.

"Yes, we do," said Father Andrew. "Gil is your boss?"

"Yes, he is," she said softly.

Father Andrew stood there speechless for a moment.

"I would appreciate it if you did not arrest anyone within the walls of the church," said Father Andrew looking at both of them.

"I'll remember that," replied Grissom.

His hand dropped Sara's arm as he turned and headed back to his vehicle.

She stood there.

"Father Andrew…"

"Did he put you up to this?" asked the priest.

"No!"

She heard the car start.

"I have to get back. I'll come back…to explain," she urged.

"You didn't tell me you already knew Gil. That was deceptive," he said sounding hurt. "Trust is something that is not given easily."

She knew.

She rarely trusted anyone and Grissom was on the top of her list of being one of the least trustful persons besides herself.

She turned quickly and got into the vehicle.

Grissom said nothing until they were past the church.

"Did he put you up to this?" asked Grissom.

"No!"

Grissom pulled over to the side of the road.

"How do you know…"

"We met one evening…he was in the alley where Ben Taylor's body was found."

"Did he tell you anything about Ben?"

"No…I would have told you!"

He said nothing more but continued to drive.

"Griss, I uhm…"

"Did you enjoy digging into my past?" he asked angrily.

"I wasn't digging. Look, Grissom, I've wanted to talk with you ever since I came back," she pleaded.

"Stay out of my personal life!" he yelled.

It felt as though he had physically slapped her.

She hurried from the car the moment they arrived at the lab.

She did not stop until she was safely in the locker room before slamming her things inside her locker.

"Bad day?" asked Nick.

Sara sat there in tears.

"Hey, I was joking," he said. "Sar, are you okay?"

"I just need to go home," she cried as she grabbed her things and left.

She did not sleep when she came home.

She paced back and forth as she waited.

She could not wait until noon so she could meet with Father Andrew.

She sat in the café for over an hour but he did not come.

She paid for the coffee and then left.

_I should have told him the truth…_

She went by the café the next day but Father Andrew did not come.

She swallowed hard as she told herself she had no one to blame but herself.

She went through the motions at work. Grissom all but acted as if she did not exist when she was in his presence. The others began to notice as Sara kept clear of Grissom.

She had convinced Dr. Randolph that she no longer needed her services since she planned to talk with Grissom. She was not prepared to work the case with Greg involving foster children. She watched as the oldest took charge while the foster care mother was being interviewed by Brass.

_She reminds me of myself…_

_That's not true…_

_I kept to myself…_

_I didn't talk to the other kids…_

_They still expected their parents to come and get them…_

_I knew that would never happen with me…_

For the first time in her career, she had used her professional status in a personal manner by pulling up her mother's case. There wasn't much that she did not already know except a few grim details. As soon as she read the report she wished she had never dug into the mess. She wasn't sure why she needed to pick at an already infected old wound. Perhaps it was the way Sofia sat there with Grissom and their laughter could be heard down the hallway. For the first time, she truly felt alone. A sense of futility of ever trying to get Grissom to love her gripped her and she felt she could not breathe. He couldn't even sit by her side in seclusion and have a conversation that was not painful.

Sara had issues.

Sara had a past that rivaled any criminal or victim they came into contact with on a daily basis.

The case with the foster children brought back emotions she had hoped had been long buried but now they reminded her that she would probably never bury her past. She would live with it the rest of her life. She sat there in the locker room and tried to control the shaking in her hands.

She hid them under her legs when she heard Greg enter.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," she answered.

"I just came from the hospital," he said. "Kids are in critical condition. It's going to be months before they recover from the starvation."

She nodded.

"The mom was pretty upset about the death of her son," he added quietly.

She nodded.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine," she replied quietly.

"Night," he said.

"Night," she managed to get out. She knew she wasn't fine. She was in trouble. She did not trust anyone except Grissom or Father Andrew and she knew she couldn't go to either because of her deception.

_I need to talk with Grissom…_

_I can't handle this much longer…_

She managed to get within a few feet of the break room when she heard their voices.

She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him standing there talking with Sofia. Her body was much too close to his and yet he did not seem to mind. He smiled and laughed at their conversation. Sara stepped back and ran in the opposite direction.

She did not drive by the café the next day.

She lay there curled up on the couch as she watched the clock.

She had lost count of when she had slept last.

She wasn't sure why she chose to pick the fight with Catherine. Perhaps she looked at the woman and was jealous over her relationship with Grissom. Her timing was poor as Ecklie stood there and overheard the conversation. Within minutes she was there in his office and then she was suspended.

She didn't care.

She'd had enough.

She grabbed the six pack of beer along with the other nonessential items she told herself she needed.

She had long since given up eating.

Snack foods were used to avoid meals these days.

She sat there scribbling out her resignation.

She had discarded the typed version and thought her handwriting made it more personal and permanent and utterly unprofessional.

It was how she had behaved.

She had been mortified once she had calmed down but then it no longer mattered.

She was leaving and getting the hell out of Vegas.

It was almost laughable.

She had put herself through hell with counseling only to wind up leaving anyway.

She opened the door on the first knock.

She half expected him.

She wasn't even embarrassed to be caught with the beer.

It would just help give her courage to leave this time.

She sighed when she realized he was not going to make it easy but then nothing ever was between them. Their conversations were usually painful.

And then he asked.

"No, Sara. I want to know why you're so angry."

He just had to ask.

_You're leaving, Sara._

_Tell him…_

_You've been trying to tell him for weeks…_

She sat there as she told him about the day her mother killed her father.

He froze as she described the murder scene in intricate detail.

He tried to hide his horror as the story unfolded and he realized she had been a witness to the crime.

He could not imagine what she would have been like as a child but he was sure he would have loved every inch of her as he did at that moment. It did not excuse her deceit and he kept himself distanced.

He sat there and watched as she slowly fell apart.

He had wanted to know.

He wondered if she was telling him only because she felt a need to share because he was sure Father Andrew had talked about him.

Her deception still angered him but he could not resist reaching out and taking her hand.

He gripped hers tightly as she cried. The contact was brief as she pulled away.

"Sara, I'm sorry," he pleaded. "I should have talked with you…you tried…several times. I'm sorry."

She said nothing as she sat there hugging herself.

He hated this.

He knew he would have to uphold the suspension.

He felt responsible for her outburst.

She had been trying to talk with him for weeks but he had kept his distance.

She did not appear affected by his declaration that he would fix this.

Her head did not even rise when he apologized for the way he had treated her these past few weeks.

"I can't remove the suspension," he admitted. "I would if I could. I'll tell Ecklie I take full responsibility for this."

It did not matter to her.

"Sara?"

"I know…counseling," she said mockingly.

He cursed.

He had to get to the lab.

"Are you going to be alright?" he asked.

She stood and opened the door.

She refused to make eye contact with him.

He stepped toward her but stopped when his movement made her step back and hold the door further open. Her eyes remained on the floor refusing to make eye contact with him and he did not push. He knew it had taken a lot for her to tell him.

She quickly shut the door the moment he stepped into the hallway.

Note from author:

I couldn't resist adding a few episodes in to this story…they kind of fit.

Leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter eight:**

He kept his word and blamed himself.

He refused to fire her and glared at Ecklie and Catherine.

In the end, the suspension was upheld but she was still employed. He called later but her phone went to voice mail. She was suspended and therefore there was no reason to leave her phone on. He drove by her apartment and even knocked on her door but she was gone. He waited for hours in his car but she did not show. He worried that she might be at a nearby bar. There was no way of knowing. As he pulled away, he tried her cell one last time leaving a message this time that he was just checking on her. Once he closed the phone he regretted it because he was sure it sounded too professional.

Sara sat there in the park.

She had rushed out without a jacket and now she regretted it as she shivered.

Father Andrew sat down beside her and it startled her.

"I haven't seen you in a long time," he announced.

She started to get up when his hand caught hers.

"That was not my fault," she said. "I was there at the café the next day…you weren't," she said as she stared at Father Andrew.

"I'm sorry. I got sick. I was in the hospital for a few days," he admitted

She sat back down. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"It seems both of our actions or lack of hurt us both," he said.

"I'm sorry. I tried to tell you…maybe not hard enough," she admitted.

"Was Gil angry?" he asked.

"Yes, he was. Let's not talk about him…agreed?" she asked.

"I don't mind," he said. "His temper used to be pretty explosive."

She said nothing.

"Shouldn't you be at work?" he asked.

"I got suspended," she said.

"Because of…our friendship?" he asked.

"No, because I went off on a supervisor and Grissom's boss…it felt good at the moment," she professed.

"You really wanted to go off on Gil, I take it," he said.

"All the time," she admitted.

"I'm sorry," he replied.

He looked at her. "How are you? Have you been sick? You've lost weight, you look as if you haven't slept in days and…you're sad," he said suddenly.

She burst into tears.

He quickly hugged her tight to him.

"I'm sorry Sara. I'm sorry you hurt," he whispered.

"You uhm been here with me for just a few minutes and he hasn't noticed in weeks," she said. "I just want to leave."

"Why don't you?" he asked.

"I need to find another job," she wailed.

"Have you really looked?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"Then you're not ready to leave," he said matter of fact.

She sat there and let him hold her.

"Have you eaten?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"Would you come to the café with me?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"I'm worried about you," he said.

"I'm good," she said as she stood.

"Sara, have you been going to counseling?" he asked.

"She released me…to talk with him," she laughed between bouts of tears.

"Have you?" he asked.

"Yeah…right after the suspension," she muttered.

"A little too late," he said.

"That wasn't his fault…mine," she replied.

"You can talk with me," he offered. "Anytime…call me. I'll come if you need me."

"Do I look that bad?" she asked.

"I'm your friend. I'm concerned about you," he said.  
"We're friends?" she gulped. "I thought you wouldn't want…"

"I don't have many friends, Sara. I guess I'm not that trusting…even if I am a priest," he admitted. "You can call me anytime…I mean that."

"Thanks," she said softly. "Not to worry…I've been ordered back to counseling…again."

He sat there and watched as she left.

She was back at work within a week.

She made her appointment with Dr. Randolph before it was required.

She poured herself a cup of coffee and turned coming face to face with Grissom.

"I uhm saw your car near the park last night," he said. "We were working a case nearby."

She wondered if the only reason he brought it up was because she had been seen with father Andrew.

"I was talking with Father Andrew," she replied.

His jaw twitched.

He quickly grabbed a cup of coffee and headed toward the door before stopping.

"I expect a report from Dr. Randolph within a week," he said.

"I already have an appointment," she said trying not to sound so hurt.

She watched as he was met by Sofia. She grabbed his arm and walked with him as they discussed a case.

She pretended it did not hurt.

It did.

She also pretended she did not care that he had invited Sofia for dinner.

_Sofia did protect him during the investigation…_

_She took Grissom's side and Ecklie demoted her…_

_Of course I protected him too…_

She told herself it did not bother her one bit that he completely ignored her.

She found herself wondering if she had even dreamed the warm embrace, the kiss or his body pressed against his. By his actions it was obvious that he was interested in someone else and it definitely was not her. It was these hurtful moments that she closed her eyes and remembered the warm embrace as well as the kiss. He may have discarded her but at least she had that moment.

Of course when she saw the way he acted with Sofia it was as if it never happened.

She slipped into the church and sat down.

He glanced up during mass and saw her sitting there.

Her eyes remained fixed on his during the entire service.

Once it ended, he expected her to rush out the door but she remained in her seat.

He finally made his way to her.

"I'm glad to see you," he said.

She smiled sadly.

"Still having problem sleeping?" he asked.

"It's getting better," she lied.

"It's not nice to lie before God," he teased.

"Sleep is overrated," she quipped.

He held her hand.

"How's counseling?" he asked.

"Painful," she said barely above a whisper.

"You still look sad," he said. "What did he do?"

"Nothing," she whispered.

He said nothing further but was content to sit there and hold her hand. Her head rested on his shoulder.

"It'll get better Sara," he whispered.

She laughed. "I think I'm almost ready for the insane asylum…maybe your God will show me a sign…have Dr. Randolph commit me."

"You're strong, Sara. You don't need…"

Her beeper went off.

She pulled it out.

He saw that it was Grissom.

"You just got off work," he fumed.

"Part of the job," she said as she stood.

"Sara you're exhausted," he protested.

"He's uhm worked also," she said.

_Why do I still need to protect him…_

She met him at the lab.

She stood there with kit in hand.

He said nothing as they drove up to the building.

She glanced at him but said nothing.

She felt her pulse begin to race.

_Careful what you ask for Sara…_

She stepped out and looked up at the asylum.

"You okay with this?" he asked suddenly as if it were an afterthought to the second round of counseling.

She squared her shoulders and ascended the stairs.

She went into work mode and he told himself it was for the best.

He had contemplated calling someone else but they were tied up as well and besides he felt the urge to work with her. She had been like a ghost around the lab slipping in and out of rooms before he could even get a good look at her. It wasn't exactly true. It was the reason he called her. She had seemed different, almost distant, with the others. He had listened to the guys in the locker room. Sara had blown off all contact with them.

He remembered the second round of counseling and wondered if that was part of the problem. He was sure he was part of the problem. He had kept his distance as well. He still felt guilty for causing the outburst. If he had been a real supervisor he would have been following up with her. Instead he ordered her to have counseling and never bothered to discuss any of it with her.

So now they stood in the hallway of a mental institute and he was sure that he would be cursing himself in a few hours for his poor choice of timing.

He had not even taken the time to review the few scant details before paging her.

He tried to joke about the circumstances but she found no humor in it.

She hated the place.

She hated everything it represented.

She bit the inside of her lower lip until she tasted copper as she swabbed the mouths of the inmates.

Sara was not prepared to be cornered.

She cursed when she turned and heard his voice.

She knew she was trapped the moment she saw him standing there with the door shut behind him.

They were both locked inside.

She fumbled for the needle on the counter but as she lunged at him, his hands caught hers. She soon found herself down in the floor with Adam Trent. Grissom's face soon appeared. His expression did not seem to help matters as she knew she had screwed up once again.

She waited for the moment to break free and once she did, she hurried out the door. Grissom watched as she ran down the hall and Adam lay in the floor with blood squirting from his throat where he had tried to kill himself.

He cursed inwardly at his stupidity for bringing her there.

It was completely inconsiderate of him.

"You sure you're alright?" he heard himself say.

_Of course she's not alright you stupid bastard…_

"Crazy people do make me feel crazy," she said in a strange voice she did not even recognize as her own.

He offered to take her off the case but he realized he was only throwing salt into an already open and festering wound.

"I appreciate it…I really do but I'll see this through," she had said.

She did.

She went back to the lab and helped process the evidence.

She was there for the arrest of the mother but then she disappeared.

She fled the moment she got the chance and locked herself into her apartment.

He looked down at his watch and realized they had just pulled a triple. He searched the lab but she was nowhere. She had slipped away once again.

Grissom tapped on her door.

He heard the many clicking of locks and then she appeared.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

_No, I want you to go away…_

_Leave me alone…_

_Let me fall apart in peace…_

_Could you hold me and tell me I'm not going to turn out like that…_

He quickly stepped inside before she could make up her mind.

"How much counseling this time?' she asked. "I haven't finished with my time for the suspension…how much this time?"

"I'm not here….for that," he stuttered.

"Reprimand? Another suspension? Maybe you've decided my resignation would be better than having me around to…"

"What were you thinking?" he cursed letting his anger finally show. "Why did you let him get the door locked?"

She crossed her arms settling into a defiant stance. "I didn't go in there intent on being taken hostage…the mere fact that he even touched me…"

She stopped as she turned away from him.

"You left without coming by…we should have discussed this in my office," he said trying not to sound so desperate to know that she was alright.

He didn't like the way she made him feel.

He suddenly felt vulnerable and mad as hell.

She could have been seriously hurt.

She had been taken hostage in front of his eyes and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it but stand there and pray Adam would not harm her.

And he did.

He prayed and prayed as he repeatedly told the security guard to get the door unlock.

He tried to shield his true feelings as he scanned her up and down.

He wanted to drag her into his arms.

He couldn't.

He knew he had to act in a professional manner.

_Always, the professional…_

"You were taken hostage…there's paperwork that will have to be completed about the incident," he said.

He could not believe he had said it the way he did.

_Great Grissom…_

_Make her feel like you're here in a professional capacity…_

He knew he was making matters worse.

"I was worried," he finally uttered.

"Worried?" she laughed sadly. "Why? Afraid I'm no longer an asset for the department? Sara Sidle, the CSI with the almost DUI and now a previous hostage of a lunatic? Kind of tarnishes the department, doesn't it?"

He stood there and watched as she tried to hide her trembling hands.

"I'm tired Griss. I can't do…this," she admitted feeling herself drop onto the couch. "I quit. My resignation has been on the counter for weeks…take it when you leave."

"I didn't come here to get your resignation," he said feeling his insecurity intensify.

"Then what?" she asked almost pleading. "What do you want? You want me to admit I screwed up? I screwed up! I turned my back, I let Adam lock the door, I couldn't fight him off, he held me hostage…God it would have been easier if he had just killed me!"

She was startled when his fingers dug into her arms.

"Don't you ever say that!" he yelled.

His tone and sudden anger frightened her. Grissom immediately regretted his actions. Even when Adam held her at knife point, he had not seen fear in her eyes. He now saw it as she inched away from him.

"I'm sorry," he said suddenly as he softened his hold on her but she quickly scooted back into the couch and wrapped her arms around her legs as she pulled a blanket about her.

"I won't accept your resignation," he whispered.

He stood there and watched as she tried to control the trembling.

"Sara…"

"If you won't… accept my resignation….could you at least… please go," she trembled.

He was gone before she could even exhale.

She sat there rocking herself back and forth as she slowly cried.

Note from author:

I know…you want Grissom to get his *** in gear. Hang in there. It is coming… Some fluff soon…

Take care,

Penny


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine:**

Neither slept as the day passed and once again they were back in the lab.

She sat there quietly during assignments.

Her eyes never roamed in his direction.

She grabbed hers and headed out the door with Nick. He had heard about the abduction. It was spreading like wildfire throughout the lab. She said nothing during the drive and once they arrived on the scene, he divided up the house. She took off without a word.

He finally caught up with her after several hours and it was then he saw the bruises. He also noticed the way she winced when she moved from time to time. There was no doubt she was in pain and he questioned whether she should even be at work.

An officer stepped inside the room and his voice startled her. She dropped the piece of evidence and rushed to the other side of the room. Nick said nothing as he waited for the officer to leave. It had been no different when he stuck his head into the room and announced he had finished with the adjoining room. It was not like Sara to be caught off guard much less frightened and he knew fear when he saw it.

He made small talk until they were finished. He glanced at her from time to time watching for her reaction to his joke or story.

Nothing came from her lips.

"Cat got your tongue?" he finally asked.

She shook her head.

"Sara, can you talk?" he asked.

"Yes…I can," she said trying to sound forceful but it came out as a squeak.

"Right," he muttered. "You should have stayed home."

"I'm good," she croaked. "Been off work too much."

He let it drop not wanting to bring up the suspension.

Once they returned to the lab, she seemed a little better. She was not as jumpy. Nick leaned over and brushed his hand against the bruised area on her neck.

"Geez, Sar. That's got to hurt," he cringed.

Grissom's head shot around the corner of the hallway.

Sara leaned away from Nick.

"It's not so bad," she whispered.

"Yeah, right," he fumed. "Is that the reason you can't talk?"

_No, I screamed myself hoarse…_

_Adam was a walk in the park…_

He was there in the break room when Nick walked in grabbing a cup of tea.

"Didn't know you drink tea," observed Grissom.

"I don't. It's for Sara. That bastard did a number on her throat," he seethed. "She's been hoarse all night."

"Is she alright?" he asked.

"Between you and me, I think the whole thing unnerved her. I can't count the number of times I or one of the officers startled her," stated Nick as he headed out the door. "She's got some pretty nasty bruises on her body."

Grissom looked shocked.

"Bastard…she won't tell you but the bruises on her neck are not as bad as the fear."

"Fear?" Grissom asked.

"Griss, it's one thing to be startled but she's scared," whispered Nick. "She never should have come in tonight but I don't think she wanted to be alone."

_I just walked out of there and left her alone…_

She smiled when she saw Nick return.

He sat the tea down on her desk and she mouthed "Thank you."

"Go home," Nick ordered.

"I'm almost finished," she whispered as she sipped on the tea. "This is good."

"Throat any better?" he asked.

"Some," she said.

He pulled back the scarf. "It looks worse…much more bruising."

"Great…just great," she whispered.

Nick grabbed her report.

"Give me that. I'll drop it off in Grissom's basket. Go home," he ordered softly.

"Night," she said.

"Hey Sara, why don't I come over and just make sure you…"

"I don't need…baby…sitter," she managed to get out.

"I know. I just thought…."

She quickly shook her head.

"If you need anything, call me," he offered as he headed down the hall.

Nick tapped on Grissom's door.

"Got Sara's report," said Nick. "She's gone home."

Grissom nodded as he grabbed his own jacket.

"You leaving also?" asked Nick.

"Had enough overtime this week," he replied.

"Good for you," said Nick.

Grissom stood outside her door.

He hesitated a moment before knocking.

He knocked again when she did not answer.

On the third knock, she thrust the door open.

It was obvious she had been in the shower.

He stepped inside and closed the door for her.

They stood there face to face.

She waited for him to speak.

She felt the dread inch its way around her heart.

It was not like him to come without an agenda.

Her brain reviewed the day's event and she could not remember doing anything that would warrant a visit.

"I didn't miss a counseling appointment," she whispered. "She rescheduled on me."

"Nick told me you weren't feeling well during shift," he said. "You should have told me."

His hand immediately went to her neck but she leaned away.

"Oh honey, that looks bad," he said.

She did not object when he slowly pulled her into his arms.

She needed the comfort at the moment and decided she was willing to do anything for some semblance of nurturing from him.

"Hot tea with honey…will help. Let me fix some for you," he said as he headed toward the kitchen without invitation.

He noticed the kettle was already warm.

She sat there on the couch wrapped in a blanket.

He handed her the tea and sat down beside her.

"You should have stayed home," he scolded softly. "You must have been in pain."

"I've had worse," she replied.

He imagined she had.

"Sara…"

He stopped and said nothing more but was content to sit next to her. He gently pulled the blanket away from her neck and examined the bruises. He could see Adam's finger imprints on her neck. His lips were light as he leaned over kissing each spot.

She breathed in deeply.

"So sorry," he whispered as his lips brushed hers.

He pulled her into his arms and covered her with the blanket.

"Just let me hold you," he whispered.

She did.

She expected him to bolt at any minute but he didn't. He sat there holding her in his arms as her head rested on his shoulder. The tea slowly disappeared while the room remained silent. She nodded off once or twice jerking her head back.

"Sleep, Sara," he urged.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I took something…just before my shower. It seems to be working."

"Do you usually take…" he stopped himself and did not finish.

"No, I don't," she said quietly.

"Go to bed," he urged. "You need the rest."

She felt herself being pulled up.

She stood now.

They stared at one another.

"Griss, I need…" she did not finish as her hands folded about herself.

She would not ask.

She did not think she could bear any rejection at this time.

She turned and walked slowly to her bedroom.

She curled her body around the extra pillow as she closed her eyes. She listened for the door. There was a click and then the door shut. She gulped back a wave of tears.

She sniffled as she clung to the pillow more forcibly.

She jumped when she felt her bed give way as he joined her.

He gently pulled her into his arms.

"You're safe Sara," he whispered. "I'm here."

She curled up next to him.

"Thank you Griss," she managed to get out.

"For what?" he asked.

"For staying…with me," she said.

He kissed her on the forehead as her hand gently caressed his cheek. He kissed the palm and then let it rest on his chest. She could not believe he was lying in bed beside her. She wanted nothing more than to savor every second. Instead, she was asleep within minutes but he chose to lie there holding her.

_I could have lost you…_

_You could have died…_

_Never been so scared in my life…_

_Never felt so helpless…_

She rolled over several hours later and frowned when her hand found an empty bed. She lay there on her stomach, refusing to open her eyes and face an empty apartment. She had been so tired she had not even felt him slip out of the bed nor heard the door shut as he left.

Her head rose suddenly when she smelled a delicious smell permeating through the bedroom door. She quickly jumped out of bed and opened the door to find him standing near the counter.

"Hey," he said softly. "I thought I would make you some homemade soup…vegetarian of course. It will help with the sore throat."

She hurried over to the pot sitting on the stove and sniffed.

"That smells wonderful!" she whispered.

"Glad you like it," he said. "Want a bowl now?"

He set two places at the table while she sat there and watched at how efficient he had become in her kitchen.

"I snuck out and got a few things," he said. "I hope you don't mind that I took your keys in order to get back in."

"No uhm of course not."

He grinned. "You uhm needed a few things…like food."

Her eyes darted over to the counter and noticed the fruit bowl was now filled and she was sure that none of the contents of the soup came from her kitchen.

"Thank you…I've been busy…meaning to do the grocery shopping but I've…I'll reimburse you."

"Have dinner with me," he said. "That's payment enough."

She half smiled as she lifted the spoon to her lips and tasted.

He waited for her response.

"This is good," she said almost sounding surprised.

"I'm glad you like it," he said. "I've made plenty…by the looks of those bruises, your throat is going to be sore for several days."

"It's better," she replied as her hand went up to conceal the bruises. He gently removed her hand.

"I like your neck," he chided.

She blushed as she continued to eat the soup.

She was surprised at how he had managed to do so much without waking her.

"I didn't hear you leave," she admitted.

"You were exhausted," he said. "I'm glad you slept."

Sara glanced at the clock and then jumped up.

"I'm sorry. Shift starts in two hours," she quivered.

"Yes, it does," he said as he sat there.

He glanced at her hand as she tried to control the trembling.

"Perhaps it would be best if you stayed home," he offered.

She shook her head as she glanced around the apartment.

He remembered Nick's conversation.

"You really want to work?" he asked.

She nodded feverishly.

He sat there and observed her.

She felt nervous by his scrutiny.

"You're usually at the lab by now," she said.

"Sara, we won't be late," he consoled.

"I'm sorry. You should have left…I didn't mean I wanted you to leave but if you needed to leave then you didn't have to stay…I mean you could have left the soup in the fridge…I would have found it…" she stopped. "I'm overtalking…see my throat is better," she squeaked out.

"Right. Your voice just changed several pitches," he said. "I think you should try not to speak. As long as you think you can work, I won't object."

"Thank…you," she managed to get out before hearing her voice give out.

"I imagine Greg is going to have fun with your inability to speak," grinned Grissom.

She nodded as she smiled.

"I should go," he said as he stood. "I put the soup in the fridge…eat it. There's also a container for dinner."

"Thanks," she mouthed.

He kissed her on the lips and held her briefly before leaving.

Note from author:

Yeah, fluff on Thanksgiving… Another chapter tonight so don't disappoint with the reviews. Happy Thanksgiving!

Take care,

Penny


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten:**

She smiled during shift despite the jokes from the guys on her inability to speak. She was surprised when he paired her with him.

She sat there in the passenger's side and reviewed the details of the crime scene.

"Thought I would rescue you from the guys…they were having too much fun," he said.

She smiled.

He refused to let her work over despite her protests. Grissom made Brass drop her off at the lab while he remained behind to finish up. She grabbed her things and headed home.

She was surprised when there was a knock on her door and she quickly opened it to find Father Andrew.

"I was getting worried," he said. "I left messages but you didn't return them."

"Can't talk," she whispered.

"Laryngitis?" he asked.

She slowly removed the scarf from her neck.

"Sara, what happened to you?" he asked suddenly.

"Wrong place at the wrong time," she whispered.

They sat there on the couch while he talked about the past several days.

"You and Gil getting along better?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Good," he said.

"Missed you," she whispered.

"I think you shouldn't be talking," he admonished.

"Sorry," she said. "So much to tell you."

"It will have to wait," he said. "Would you like for me to fix you something for lunch?"

_"_Soup in fridge_,"_ she signed. "Join me?"

"Only if you don't talk," he teased.

They sat there at the table and she watched as he took a bite.

"Did you make this?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"It's just like mine," he said.

"Grissom made it," she whispered.

"At least I taught him something," smiled Father Andrew.

Lunch ended and she flipped on the TV.

"Got you something," she whispered.

"You said you wouldn't talk," he said.

"_Movie,_" she signed.

He smiled as they sat there and watched it.

Hours passed and she nodded off finally.

Father Andrew covered her with a blanket and then cleaned up the kitchen.

He quietly let himself out.

She was startled by the beeper when it went off.

She looked around and saw that she was alone.

She grabbed her phone and called Grissom.

"Have you slept?" he asked.

"Yes," she said.

"You feel like working…with me?" he asked.

"I'm on my way," she said.

"Stay put," he said. "I'll pick you up."

"Twenty minutes," she begged.

"Bring coffee," he said.

She glanced down at the file and then back at Grissom.

"Another altar boy?" she asked.

He said nothing as they arrived on the scene.

Sara recognized the boy lying on the ground.

"That's Jimmy…Roberts," she gulped.

"You know him?" asked Brass.

"He's been at the church a lot…I helped him once or twice with his homework," she said. "His mother is a waitress and works late."

"How is it that you know so much about the church?" asked Brass.

"I visit with Father Andrew," she said quietly.

"Are you still seeing him?" asked Grissom sounding irritated.

Sara looked surprised at his tone.

"Yes."

It was not the answer he wanted.

"You okay working this case?" asked Grissom as he refused to look at her.

"I'm good," she declared.

"Take the perimeter," he ordered.

Sara hesitated for a moment but turned.

"Since when did Sara become Catholic?" asked Brass to Grissom.

"She's not!" he seethed.

"Whoa! Who missed their coffee before coming here?" Brass joked.

"Do you mind? I'm trying to work," said Grissom as he waited for Doc to finish.

"Looks like the same means of strangulation," said Doc. "I put the time of death around 2:00 p.m."

"Who kills a child and dumps him in an alley in broad daylight with no witnesses?" asked Brass.

"Someone who is taunting us," replied Grissom.

Grissom gently slipped open the young boy's hand and pulled out a crucifix.

"I think he just got messy," announced Grissom.

She said nothing as they drove back to the lab. They had spent the last six hours working the case and he had said very little to her during that time.

Once they drove up, he started to get out when her hand shot out to his.

"Wait, we need to talk," she said.

"We have evidence to log in," he replied as he started to get out.

"Fine. Just blow me off! You've been pissed for the last six hours. Want to tell me what I've done?" she asked.

"Why do you spend time with Andrew?" he asked.

"It's Father Andrew and we're friends. Gil, we don't discuss you if that's what…"

He was out of the vehicle before she could finish.

She quickly made her way to the back of the vehicle and began lifting the bags.

"I'll get these," he said.

"It's my case also," she countered.

She was not prepared for him to remove the bags from her hand.

"Not anymore," he ordered.

"Why?" she asked letting the frustration sound in her voice.

"I'm your supervisor and I decide what cases you…"

She fumed as she did not stay to hear the lecture.

She opened the door of the lab and practically ran into Brass.

"You didn't have your coffee either?" Brass asked.

She quickly sped past him and he glanced at Grissom.

"You seem to have such a sparkling personality today," said Brass.

Brass chuckled when he was received with a scowl as Grissom walked past him.

"Let's do this again soon," called Brass.

"Hey, Lindsey was sick," said Catherine. "Sorry Grissom had to call you in." She looked at Sara's empty hands. "Where is the evidence?"

"The evidence to his case is coming with him," seethed Sara as she stormed into the break room.

"Someone needs coffee," snorted Greg.

Sara shot him a "eat shit and die" glare.

He quickly retreated behind his newspaper.

Grissom's head popped into the room. "DB found out on Interstate Fifteen. Nick and Sara take it."

Her cup stopped in midair.

Greg and Nick looked at her.

"Hey, I uhm available," offered Greg.

"We're going to need you with us," replied Grissom. "Hodges is backed up."

Grissom disappeared.

Sara sat her coffee cup down on the counter and headed out.

"I would buy her a cup of Starbucks if I were you," whispered Greg.

"No kidding," said Nick. "What pissed her off?"

"My money is on the bugman."

She wiped her brow as they continued working.

Nick glanced over at her.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Fine," she fumed.

"You haven't said much," he said. "Something wrong?"

She unloaded on him.

Nick stared at her as she went off on her tirade.

"He doesn't let me finish the case last night because he didn't want me to work over but then he calls me up and lets me work another case only to pull me off it before sending me out here in the middle of nowhere!"

She stood there fuming.

"Feel better?" smirked Nick.

"I wouldn't mess with me when I'm pissed," she warned.

Nick's hands went into the air. "I'm not. Just concerned. Your voice sounds better, by the way."

She grinned as she returned to work.

They stood outside in the parking lot and patted each other's clothing.

"Nothing like the wind kicking up the dust," chuckled Nick. "We're covered."

"I just want to shower and go home," she moaned.

"Yeah, well I'll wash your back if you do mine," teased Nick.

"Sorry," said Sara as she stepped into the women's shower.

"Let me know if you need help," called Nick.

Nick turned and found Grissom standing there.

Nick glanced back at the locker room.

"Wind storm…lots of dust…Sara is taking a shower…just joking," he said quickly as he hurried into the men's shower.

She sat down on the bench as she tied her shoes.

She glanced up and saw Greg.

"Is it safe to come in here?" he asked. "I can come back."

"It's safe. Thanks for reminding Nick to get Starbuck's," she said with a smile.

Greg returned the smile. "Anytime. I'm ready to go home and sleep. Don't know how Grissom is still awake... he's staying through the interrogation of some priest."

"What priest?" asked Sara.

"Andrew…something," replied Greg as he sat down on the bench. He glanced up when he saw Sara hurry out of the locker room.

She went straight to the interrogation room.

She watched as Brass brought Father Andrew into the room.

Grissom stopped when he saw her standing near the viewing window.

"Andrew's crucifix was found in the boy's hand," said Grissom.

Sara glanced inside the room.

She knew Father Andrew did not appear well.

"Maybe he gave it to Jimmy," she said softly.

"Since when did you ever see Andrew without it?" he asked.

He always had it with him.

Sara bit her lower lip.

Grissom stepped inside and sat down.

She watched as they showed the photos to Father Andrew.

He was visibly upset.

Catherine came and stood next to Sara.

"I can't believe a priest would kill young boys," said Catherine.

Sara did not reply.

Catherine glanced at Sara.

"What uhm was the time of death?" asked Sara.

"Around 2:00 p.m. I mean why kill the boy and then dump his body in broad daylight?"

Sara quickly headed toward the door.

"Sara, you can't go in there," called Catherine.

Sara opened the door and stepped inside.

"I need to talk with you," whispered Sara to Grissom.

"I'm in an interrogation," he warned.

"This is important…it's about…"

Grissom stood quickly and grabbed her by the arm leading her out the door.

She waited until the door was closed.

"You have the wrong person," she began.

"Stay away from this case," he fumed. "Interfere again and I'll write you up."

Sara stood there with her arms folded. "Fine! Write me up! You're not putting him through any more questions!"

"He waived his right to counsel," said Grissom trying to calm the explosive conversation.

He had not meant to go through with his threat.

He had merely wanted her to leave.

"He could not have committed the murder," she countered.

"Go home, Sara," warned Grissom.

"He was with me!"

Grissom's face fell.

She was sure she saw betrayal written across his face.

Note from author:

Okay, so there's still a little fluff...just look down deep...LOL

Take care,

Penny


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven:**

"He came over and we had lunch together. We then sat down and watched a movie together. It was well past 4:00 when I fell asleep. Father Andrew left sometime after that," glared Sara.

Grissom stared at her.

"If you had left me on the case then I would have told you sooner," she stated.

Grissom turned and stepped back inside.

"Where were you around 2:00 pm?" asked Grissom.

Father Andrew stared at Grissom and said nothing.

Brass glanced at Grissom.

"Father Andrew, 2:00 p.m….dead boy. Does this ring a bell?" asked Brass.

"I went to see a friend…she hadn't come by and she had not returned my call. It wasn't like her," he said. "I went to her apartment."

"Do you often make home visits…with women…"

Sara burst into the room.

"That's enough," she glared.

"I told Grissom he was with me at my apartment. No need to put him through any further questioning…that is unless the two of you don't believe me?" she asked as she glared at the two.

"Father Andrew, I'll take you home," said Sara. "And next time, he'll have counsel present!"

"Sara, I don't need counsel. I have nothing to hide," Father Andrew replied sadly.

"It's just for your own protection…against this," she fumed.

Father Andrew looked at the two men who kept their eyes diverted from Sara.

"May I leave?" asked Father Andrew.

"Yes, you can," replied Brass.

Sara grabbed the old man's jacket as they headed out the door.

Once she was gone, Brass looked at Grissom. "Thanks for setting me up," he snarled. "Sara was ready to kick my ass. You could have told me that Father Andrew was with her."

"We didn't hear it from him," said Grissom.

"And you think Sara would risk her job and implicate herself as an accessory to murder by lying? You really don't like this man do you? Or is it Sara?" asked Brass.

Grissom said nothing as he left.

He banged on the door and was ready to face her temper but was surprised when she opened the door quickly and practically pushed him away from the entrance.

"What do you want?" asked Sara.

He felt odd standing out into the hallway with her.

"We need to talk," he said.

"No."

"Sara…"

"I'm too pissed. I'm not talking with you," glared Sara.

There was a noise inside the room and she glanced inside.

Grissom noticed the jacket on the couch.

"You have company," he said in a low voice.

"I didn't want to leave him alone at his apartment," she said quietly. "He's not well."

Sara glanced in the apartment.

She turned around to find Grissom retreating down the hallway.

She quickly went after him.

"I want to talk with you!" she whispered. "Not now…but we need to talk."

Grissom said nothing as he stood there and stared at her.

"I swear Grissom there are times when I would love nothing more than to kick your ass! You had no right to treat him like that! It's none of your business that we're friends. I don't know what it is that you think he did all those years ago but he is a good man and I will not let you pull that shit with him again!"

She turned on her heel and headed back toward the apartment but turned abruptly and grabbed him. Her actions caught him offguard. She kissed him firmly on the lips before releasing him.

A small grin came to his face as he turned and left.

Andrew coughed once again as Sara sat down on the bed.

"Feeling better?" she asked.

"Yes," he said. "I should go home."

Sara pushed him back down.

"Don't make me angry. If you've learned anything today, it's that I have a nasty temper so don't even try to leave."

"Sara, I shouldn't stay. It doesn't look right for a man to stay with a young woman…"

"You're a priest and you're my friend. God knows there is nothing inappropriate going on here."

He smiled. "You didn't say 'your God'. Could it be that my faith is rubbing off on you?"

"Just rest. I'll be in there, if you need anything."

She dozed a few hours on the couch as she quietly checked on him. She glanced at her watch and knew the young kids would be arriving at the church soon. She was startled when she saw him standing there in the doorway.

"I'm feeling much better," he insisted.

"Why don't I believe you?" she said as she watched him head toward the door.

"I need to get to the church. The children will be there soon. They may have heard about Jimmy. I still need to meet with his mother."

"Father?"

He turned and looked at her.

"Why would Grissom think you could be involved in a murder…of children?" she asked.

"I was a prime suspect in California several years ago."

Sara tried not to react.

"Gil was young…he was still upset about…" Father Andrew sighed. "He blamed me for protecting someone…I was with someone…during the times of the murders. Sara, I couldn't tell him. He wouldn't take no for an answer and pressed further. The media found out I was a prime suspect and I was removed from my parish. Later, there was some unknown DNA that was found…it wasn't mine. I was released. I never heard anything more about it."

"The cases were never solved?" she asked.

"No. I was placed at a different parish after several years."

"Wait, he's mad at you and he was the reason you lost your parish?" she asked.

"I was new to the congregation. Suddenly there are two murders and I'm a suspect."

"But you were released…"

"I had already been judged…I was fortunate that I was given another parish. I've been happy there. I had just retired when Father Powell asked me to come here and cover for him. I think that was a mistake."

"We met," she said softly.

"Yes, we did," he admitted. "I stand corrected."

"Call me…if you need anything," she urged.

"Call me…so I don't worry," he countered. "I imagine Gil will be quite angry that you gave me an alibi this time."

"It was the truth," she said. "You were with me."

"I'm already condemned in Gil's eyes," he replied.

"Father Andrew…I know we said we wouldn't talk…"

"You should ask him," he said as he started to leave.

She nodded.

"Father?"

He turned and looked at her.

"Even if I wasn't your alibi, I would have believed you."

"Be safe, Sara," he said as he left.

She was waiting for him in his office the moment he arrived in the lab.

He shut the door and it actually surprised her that he would risk being caught alone with her.

"I need to ask you something," she said.

"I'm listening," he said as he sat down.

She looked at him.

"You look tired. Did you get any sleep?" she asked.

"You came to ask me how I'm sleeping?" he asked.

"I need to know what happened between you and…"

"I'm not discussing that with you," he ordered.

"I'm trying to understand," she pleaded. "Look, I just want…"

There was a tap on the door as Brass stuck his head in. "Is it safe to come in?"

"Sara was just leaving," said Grissom.

She stood and fled from the room.

"You just have a way with her," said Brass as he watched Sara storm down the hallway.

"Still pissed about the interrogation?" Brass asked.

"Do you need something?" asked Grissom.

"I thought you could tell me what you have on this Father Andrew," said Brass sitting down.

Grissom stood.

"I have assignments to give out," he said.

"Gil?"

Grissom looked at him.

"Don't let your past cloud your judgment. We could have simply asked Father Andrew to see his crucifix…maybe there was a logical explanation why the boy had it. There was no need to bring him in for questioning."

"We didn't. You asked and he agreed to come in."

"You know how it looked," said Brass.

"He was assisting with an investigation," replied Grissom leaving.

"Next time, I'm not going to jump so quickly unless I know you've got more than just a crucifix."

Grissom shut the door.

"Two boys were murdered in Andrew's congregation twenty years ago in California. Both boys were altar boys. One of the boys was found with scrapings under his fingernails. It seems he fought back before his neck was snapped. Unknown DNA from an assailant. Both boys were seen with a priest just hours before their murder. One of the boys had a crucifix found on his body. Andrew admitted it belonged to him."

"How did he explain the crucifix?" asked Brass.

"He said he'd lost it," said Grissom. "I think it was taken from him. He never let it out of his sight…much less his body. He refused to tell me who had access to it. He was not at the church…he was with someone."

"Have any idea who that person might have been?" asked Brass.

"If I knew that, we might have found out who the DNA belonged to."

"It still doesn't explain why you hate him so much," said Brass.

"No, it doesn't," said Grissom as he left.

"Nice talking with you," called out Brass as he shook his head.

He knew she was angry although she said nothing.

They kept their distance from one another.

The others noticed the battle line that had been drawn.

Sara ignored them all as she focused on the case he had given her.

She did not even complain when he sent Greg with her on a case that clearly could have been handled solo.

She pulled out her kit from the back of the vehicle and was immediately met with Greg holding a Starbuck's coffee.

She grinned. "You're idea of hoping I won't bite your head off?"

"No, I just thought you needed this. You look tired."

She was.

She had slept little while Father Andrew had stayed at her apartment.

Greg took the lead and she was content to let him. She commented every now and then as he grinned from ear to ear. Once they were finished, they returned to the lab.

"I'm proud of you Greg. You've learned a lot," she said. "You're ready to work solo."

"You really think so?" he asked eagerly.

"No…I just wanted to make you feel good…because of the coffee," she teased.

He frowned as she grinned. "You've improved a lot. Soon…solo…soon."

His smile returned.

"Thanks Sara."

She grabbed her messages from Judy as she started toward her desk.

She stopped suddenly.

"Judy, do you know where Grissom is?"

"He's still out in the field," she said.

"I have to leave early," said Sara. "Please be sure and tell Grissom when he gets in."

Judy jotted down the note. "Is something wrong?"

Sara did not reply as she rushed out of the lab.

Grissom ignored Catherine's onslaught of questioning as he stopped to get his messages. He looked up at Judy.

"Sara left early?" he asked.

"Seemed upset…told me to leave you this note," said Judy. "If you ask me, it was about that priest."

"Priest?" asked Grissom.

"Hospital called. Some father…was admitted. Sara was listed as his contact person."

Catherine and Grissom glanced at one another.

"They've gotten pretty cozy fairly fast," whispered Catherine.

She stared as Grissom left the office.

"Want to tell me where you're going?" she called.

"I'm off the clock," he called.

Note from author:

Where do you think Grissom is off to?

Leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve:**

Grissom stood there and watched as she sat there with Father Andrew.

She turned and saw him.

She quietly slipped her hand from Andrew's and stepped out of the room.

"How is he?" asked Grissom.

"Do you care?" asked Sara.

"You care. How is he?"

"He hasn't been feeling well. They're going to run some tests," she said.

"Sara…"

"Why are you here?" she asked.

"Because…I was worried about you," he whispered.

It seemed odd how her hand slipped into Father Andrew's as Grissom's hand held hers firmly.

They remained that way for over an hour.

She glanced at him and could see how truly tired he was.

"Griss, go home," she urged pulling at him to stand.

"You should leave soon," he urged himself.

"When he's awake. I'll leave," she lied.

He turned to leave but she quickly grabbed his hand.

"Thank…you for coming by," she said as she held him.

She kissed him causing him to hold her more possessively.

He reluctantly released her as he left.

She leaned back into her seat and closed her eyes.

Hours passed and he woke.

"Sara, go home," he said with a smile as he squeezed her hand.

"I don't want to leave you," she said.

"I'm feeling much better. It's my blood pressure, I'm sure of it," he said. "I'm just going to sleep some more. Go home and get some rest."

"I'd feel better if I stayed," she said.

"I'll be here when you get back," he teased. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Are you sure about that?" she croaked out.

He saw it then.

It was love and fear he saw in her eyes.

His eyes misted.

"I love you too," he said. "Go home for me."

She leaned over and kissed him on the forehead.

"You promise you'll be here when I get back?" she whispered.

"I promise," he said with a twinkle in his eye.

She didn't want to leave him.

Emotions pooled in her eyes and he squeezed her hand.

"Is it so hard to believe?" he asked.

"I don't just love anyone," she gulped. "I learned to keep a distance…."

"You love Gil," he said.

"Believe me I tried not to love him but it was like denying myself air to breathe," she gulped.

"I felt that way about Emily…and Gil," he admitted. "I decided to accept it. I keep it hidden…locked away until times like this and I wish…things were different."

His lips quivered. "You mean so much to me Sara. You managed to slip inside my heart the first day we met."

He glanced over at her and saw the fear she was trying so poorly to conceal.

"You're afraid I'm going to die. I'm not going to die Sara," he assured.

"I don't think I could bear to lose you now that I've found you," she admitted. "I want more time."

"Then we'll have it," he replied.

He kissed the palm of her hand.

Grissom had done that before.

"Go home," he said sternly. "I'll see you later."

Father Andrew insisted she go despite her objections.

She glanced down at her watch and sighed.

She was startled when her phone rang.

"Sidle," she said through a yawn.

"Is it a good time to talk?" asked Grissom.

"Just heading home," she answered.

"Come by…the townhouse," he said.

She was surprised when he made the request.

"I'll uhm be there in twenty minutes," she replied. "Have coffee."

"It won't be Starbuck's," he said.

"Just black…and strong."

He opened the door before she had time to knock.

He held the door open and she stepped inside.

"I don't smell coffee," she frowned.

"I didn't think you should drink any if you were planning on sleeping before shift."

"I need coffee to stay awake," she replied.

"I'm sorry…we've been trying to talk with one another…I don't think this can wait," he said.

"No, it can't," she admitted.

She sat down on his couch and he opted for the chair.

They looked at one another.

"You called," she reminded him.

"Don't trust Andrew," he blurted out.

She bristled. "Why?"

He stared at her as if struggling with how much to tell her.

"He's been a good friend," she said.

"Do you value his friendship over ours?" he asked.

She felt her stomach knot.

"I always thought that you were more than just a friend," she whispered.

Their eyes locked.

He knew the ball was back in his court.

"I…am," he said finally.

The knots in her stomach were replaced with butterflies.

They were getting somewhere even if it was not what they needed to talk about.

"Griss..." she stopped and licked her lips. "Gil, whether you want to admit it or not, he loves you. I heard it in his voice every time he talked about you. He misses you…what happened?"

"He doesn't love anyone but that damn robe," he said.

She was startled by his tone.

She waited.

"Andrew was a friend of the family…for as long as I can remember, he was there. He was my mother's childhood friend," he explained.

Sara looked as if each word was fresh and new.

She did not want to admit she had heard this before.

_Childhood sweetheart…_

"My mother's religion was very important to her. There was never a time when we did not go to mass. I uhm became an altar boy at a young age…Latin was a second language to me. I idolized him," he said.

Sara looked at him.

"Your father or…Father Andrew?"

"Both I suppose," he said softly. "I loved my father and his work but I also loved…the church," he said.

"My father was a botanist. He used to take me on trips with him," said Grissom softly. "We were inseparable. We talked about anything and everything," he paused. "My father went to sleep one evening on the couch…and never woke up. I was nine."

She sat there quietly and waited for him to continue.

"When my father died, I was…angry," he said. "I was angry that I had lost him…with him gone, the house suddenly became very quiet. My uhm mother was deaf…she used to read our lips and talk…she stopped talking when my father died…so did I. I stopped going to school. Father…Andrew came one day, he made me leave my room…he made my mother speak…he made us function again."

She swallowed.

She wanted nothing more than to hold him at that moment. She was afraid to move for fear he would stop talking. He had just told her more about himself than he had in six years.

She chose to sit there in silence.

"He uhm replaced my father. He greeted me every evening when I came home from school while my mother remained at the gallery. He uhm taught me to cook…we made most of the meals since she was late most days. We sat in the same spot at mass everyday and when it ended, he walked us home. "

He hesitated for a moment before he continued.

"I became more interested in my father's work. I uhm examined everything I could get my hands on…I collected dead animals from the beach and did autopsies. Our neighbor's cat died one day. I found it curled up in the bushes as if it were sleeping. I decided to…my mother did not understand…she went to Andrew. He assured her it was normal behavior…I was going to be a doctor someday."

"Did you want to?" she asked.

"No, I just wanted to know how things lived…died," he admitted. "I then focused on the aftermath of death….which led me to being a criminalist."

She nodded slowly.

He glanced up at her briefly before continuing.

"I didn't decide this until later…I told my mother I was going to join the priesthood," he said.

Sara felt her pulse racing.

"I thought he would be proud of me," Grissom said. "Instead, he told me I should pursue medicine…or my father's work…but I did not belong in the church."

"I thought he was just testing me but then he stopped coming to the house…so I went to the church instead. He uhm told me I shouldn't be there. I decided he was angry because I had not asked for permission from my mother. When I did, she said it was best that I not spend so much time with Andrew. I didn't understand. I got angry and ran off. I stayed gone for two days…at the beach. Andrew found me. He was angry that I did such a thing to my mother and told me to go home. I just wanted him to love me…like I thought he did. I begged him to let me stay with him and he refused. He told me I needed to stay with my mother."

He got up and she watched as he made coffee.

She took a cup when he offered it.

"I went home. I stayed at home by myself…I fixed dinner by myself…I did homework and experiments by myself. We went to mass as usual but I no longer cared to be an altar boy. I refused to participate. I wanted to hurt him like he had hurt me but instead he didn't care. He continued as if I didn't exist."

Her hand slipped into his while they sat together on the couch.

"My grades slipped. I began dodging school. It no longer interested me. My uhm mother went to Andrew for help. He was there one evening when I showed up. I had skipped school and spent it at the beach. He reprimanded me. I told him I didn't care. I cursed at him until I thought for sure the heavens would open up and I would be struck by lightning but nothing happened. I didn't understand what I had done...why my father had died…why Andrew had made me feel safe and then he just…I uhm don't remember why I began to hit him with my fist. He stood there and waited until I was too exhausted to fight anymore…and then he just held me. I think it was the last time I ever cried. When my mother came home, he sent me to my room. I could barely make out their voices. I slipped down and I saw him holding my mother. He kissed her. He kissed her like I had seen my father do so many times before. I stepped back into my room and I thought that things would be better. I thought he…"

"You thought he would really replace your father this time," she said softly.

"Yes…but he didn't. He left that night…he uhm never came back. I listened to my mother cry herself to sleep for days…and then I realized what I should have known…priest do not marry. He let us love him but then he took that love away…all because he loved that robe more than he did us."

"Gil…"

"My mother was never the same. We moved away. I didn't see Andrew again until the murders in California," he said. "We suspected it was someone connected to the church…after Andrew was ruled out we thought perhaps it was someone who Andrew counseled. He refused to tell us who was with him the night of the murders."

He tried to remove his emotions as he talked about the cases.

"One of the boys killed in California was found with a crucifix…it belonged to Andrew. Andrew's crucifix was found on one of these boys…Jimmy."

"He didn't have anything to do with those murders," she insisted.

"Maybe not but he could have been protecting a killer all these years…one that has decided to come out of retirement," said Grissom.

"Gil, you know that a priest cannot divulge the names of…"

He stood as he took the coffee cups back into the kitchen.

"Isn't a life more important than hiding a killer in the name of God?" he asked.

She didn't want to argue religion with him as she followed him to the kitchen.

"I don't know why Father Andrew did what he did back then…I'm sorry. I know he hurt you very deeply," she said softly as she stood directly in front of him.

Her hand reached up and caressed his cheek. She leaned forward and kissed him. It was soft and light but then he grabbed her and deepened the kiss.

She held him until he gently stepped back.

She glanced at the clock.

"You should sleep," she urged.

"I haven't been sleeping well," he admitted.

"You should try…you've pulled more than your share of doubles this week," she said.

He nodded.

"Sleep with me?" he asked.

Note from author:

So what do you think Sara is going to say?

Leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen:**

She swallowed the lump in her throat as she nodded.

He took her hand and she followed him through the house until they came to a closed door. He opened it and she stared into darkness. He turned on the light and she saw a much masculine decorated room but it was spacious and comfortable. He opened a top drawer and pulled out an oversized t shirt.

She took it as he walked to the other side of the bed and pulled down the covers. They each watched the other undress; each waiting for the first to put on sleepwear. She finally slipped on the t shirt and waited. He got in but held his hand out for her to join him.

She lay there beside him as she tried to adjust to the complete darkness.

He spooned his body up next to hers as his arms wrapped securely around her.

She lay there as she listened for any sign that he slept.

His breathing soon became steady and even.

She sighed as she relaxed in his arms.

_He's finally asleep…_

_He's so tired…_

_So vulnerable…_

She had never thought of Grissom as vulnerable. She caressed his arm that kept her firmly against him.

"Love you so much," she whispered.

She closed her eyes as she let herself sleep.

He woke with a start as the alarm went off. He tried to move but a weight kept him firmly on his back. He reached down and found Sara sprawled across his chest. He gently shifted but it woke her and she jumped.

He flipped on the light switch but regretted it the moment the light blinded them.

"Sorry," he said quickly as he flipped it back off.

He slid out of bed and made his way around the room and opened the door letting a small bit of light inside.

She rolled over and hid her head under a pillow.

He grinned as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I'm sorry. We have just two hours before shift," he said.

"I'm good," she said as she sat up in bed.

"Thank you…for staying," he said.

"This was…nice," she said. "Next time let's try sleeping longer."

She immediately shot a glance at him unsure if he would want a 'next time.'

"That would be nice," he replied as he reached out and stroked her hair.

"Sorry…it's probably a mess…curly…all over my head," she stuttered as she tried to fix it.

"I love…your hair curly," he grinned.

"Not me…no control…mind of its own," she groaned as she pushed herself further up.

He sat there unsure of the next move.

"I'm going to dress and then be on my way," she said as she pushed the covers back and displayed her long lanky legs.

His eyes stared at them.

She stood finding herself much too close to him.

It was Grissom who stepped away as he distanced himself from her.

She didn't know how to read his reaction.

"I need to go," she said suddenly.

"You can stay," he offered.

She quickly shook her head.

"We'll be late," she said. "I'll see you at work."

He nodded not knowing what else to do.

He wanted her.

She wanted him.

They both knew there were things that needed to be resolved.

He grabbed her hand just as she opened the front door.

"Next time…soon?" he asked.

"Definitely," she smiled.

Once home, she rushed about jumping into the shower, trying to get ready for work while checking with the hospital. She grabbed a cup of coffee once she entered the break room and stood there now trying to catch her breath.

"You look…tired," frowned Nick.

"I'm good," she replied as she finished the coffee and poured another cup.

Her phone went off and she grabbed it.

"Sidle."

She stood there while the physician talked with her about Andrew.

She glanced at her watch. "I can be there after my shift. I'll talk with him."

She closed the phone and leaned against the table.

"Is there a problem?" asked Nick.

"Father Andrew needs surgery," she trembled. "He's refusing."

"Gotten pretty tight with the man," said Nick. "You know he's a suspect in these murders."

"No, he's not! He was with me when the last child was killed."

"Sara, you think that's wise…knowing how Grissom feels about…"

"Feel about what?" asked Grissom, stepping into the break room. He glanced briefly in Sara's direction as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

"I appreciate your concern Nicky I really do but I'm fine," she said as she fled the room.

"You didn't answer my question," said Grissom.

"Sara is now making medical decisions for this Father Andrew," frowned Nick. "I figure you have good reason why you don't like the man and we should respect your decision."

"What's uhm wrong with Father Andrew?" he asked casually.

"Needs surgery," replied Nick.

Grissom said nothing as he left the room.

She glanced up from the evidence layout and saw him standing just inside the doorway.

"Are you coming in or staying out there?" she quipped.

"Nick told me the hospital called," he said quietly.

"I'm going there after work. You want to come?" she asked as she glanced in his direction.

"No."

She had hoped he would say yes.

"Listen Sara…be careful," he said softly.

"I trust Father Andrew with my life. He would never hurt me," she declared.

"Just don't trust him…with your heart," he said barely above a whisper.

Her head jerked up from the evidence but he was already gone.

She buried her head in her work until the end of shift.

She left as quickly as she arrived.

Sara ignored her tired body as she headed to the hospital.

She sat there on the edge of the bed and he frowned.

"They called you," Father Andrew pouted.

"Why?" she asked.

"I'm not ready for the surgery," he answered.

"So you're going to wait until you have a massive heart attack and then decide?"

"You're tough," he chuckled.

"Not really. I've gotten attached to you. Have the surgery…please," she urged.

He squeezed her hand. "It's not all doom and gloom. They can treat me with medication."

"You know that your condition would improve greatly if you would agree to have…"

"I'm going home Sara," he announced. "Want to help me get out of this place. The food is awful."

She snorted. He had a way of wrinkling his nose in just a way that made her laugh.

She was surprised when he was waiting for her as soon as she stepped into the lab.

"Have you slept?" Grissom asked.

She thought it was a strange question.

"Have you?" she countered.

His hand took her elbow and led her into the break room.

"You didn't come home last night," he whispered.

She grinned.

"What did you do, stake out my apartment?" she asked.

"I left a note on your door to call me," he said fidgeting.

Her grin was replaced with disappointment and he quickly caught the change in emotion.

"Would you want me to?" he asked. "That's like stalking."

"Not if…" she stopped as she decided it best to avoid these kinds of comments for more secure locations.

"Coffee?" she asked as she turned and produced a coffee cup.

He took it.

"The answer to your questions is…some," he said as he turned and started to leave.

"You didn't ask me where I was," she said.

"You were with Andrew," he said without stopping.

"And does that bother you?" she asked quickly.

It was too late.

He was already gone.

She was mad when she got home throwing her things down on the couch. Father Andrew had practically shoved her out of his apartment telling her he was not an invalid and would see her at mass.

She had no intentions of going.

Of course she went.

She had no choice in the matter.

She was worried about him.

She frantically searched for him, not relaxing until he stepped out and began the service. He did not miss a beat or at least she did not notice anything odd. She waved as she headed to work.

Days passed and she saw little of Father Andrew or Grissom.

She wondered if she had done something.

She stepped into the lab and found herself beseeched with the guys.

"We need to talk with you," urged Nick as he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the locker room.

"What is going on?" she asked.

"Another boy was found. Father Andrew has been called in for questioning."

Sara started to walk out when Nick grabbed her arm as Warrick blocked the exit.

"Sara, a witness says they saw a priest dropping the body in the park. They're trying to see if the person can make a positive ID."

"It wasn't Father Andrew," she replied as a matter of fact.

"There were skin tags left this time. They're going to compare them to Father Andrew," added Nick.

"It's not going to match," she said confidently.

"How can you be so sure?" asked Warrick.

"He is not capable of harming anyone," she said. "When did the death occur?"

She was not his alibi this time.

Her stomach knotted as she watched him enter the interrogation room. Grissom briefly glanced in her direction.

"Does he have counsel?" she asked quickly.

Grissom stopped. "He says he doesn't need any."

"Griss, you know he needs counsel."

"It's his choice," he said as he stepped away.

"He's…ill. Keep that in mind," she warned.

She found herself glued to the interrogation window as Grissom stepped inside.

Brass opened the file folder and displayed the photos of the latest victim.

"That's Benjamin Freeman," said Father Andrew.

"Is he another altar boy?" asked Brass.

"Yes, he is," said Andrew sadly.

"Was…he's dead," corrected Grissom.

Father Andrew looked at Grissom.

"What do you want to know?" Andrew asked.

"Where were you during the hours of 1:00 and 3:00 p.m.?" asked Brass.

"I was at home," he said.

"Is there someone who can vouch for you?" asked Brass.

"God," replied Father Andrew.

"There was DNA found on the child's body," said Brass. "Mind if we…"

"I'm willing to cooperate in any way," replied Father Andrew.

"May I?" asked Catherine. "Open wide."

Grissom's eyes locked with Father Andrew as Catherine swabbed his mouth.

"We know you had an alibi for the second murder…Sara Sidle but we want to ask you a few questions about Jimmy Roberts," said Brass.

"What do you want to know?" asked Father Andrew.

"There was a crucifix found with the second victim, Jimmy Roberts," said Brass.

Catherine opened the envelope and the crucifix dropped onto the table.

"Is this yours?" asked Brass.

Father Andrew looked down at the object on the table.

He said nothing.

"Father Andrew is that your crucifix?" asked Brass.

He wiped his brow as he tried to speak but only swallowed hard and nodded.

Brass glanced at Grissom.

"You have to answer yes or no," said Brass.

"Yes," Father Andrew managed to get out.

"Did you give it to Jimmy Roberts?" asked Brass.

He shook his head but then whispered, "No."

"Do you know how Jimmy ended up with it in his hands?" asked Brass.

He knew.

His hand covered his mouth as his other hand supported the other.

He looked over the heads of Brass and Grissom.

His eyes stared into the glass partition.

Sara stared back at him.

"Father Andrew, do you know how Jimmy ended up with your crucifix?" asked Brass.

He closed his eyes as if in prayer.

Brass and Catherine exchanged glances as Grissom kept his eyes on Father Andrew.

"Father Andrew, are you alright?" asked Brass.

He shook his head.

Sara bolted from the window and immediately entered the room. Catherine started to say something when Grissom's hand settled on Catherine's arm.

Sara knelt down in front of Father Andrew. "Father Andrew?" asked Sara.

His hand went out immediately and grasped Sara's.

"Do you want me to take you home?" she asked.

He shook his head.

He opened his eyes and stared into Sara's face.

"So much like her," he whispered as his hand cupped Sara's face.

"Father?" she asked. "Are you alright?"

"My fault Sara…it's my fault that these boys are dead," he said.

The room got deathly quiet.

"Is that a confession?" asked Brass.

Grissom's hands clenched the table.

"These children are dead because of me," he grieved as he looked into Sara's face.

Sara slowly shook her head back and forth.

A single tear slipped down the old man's face.

It was matched by Sara's.

Father Andrew leaned forward as if to embrace her but his body slumped over as Sara grabbed him.

"Father! Father Andrew!" cried Sara. "Somebody call an ambulance!"

The others hurried over to the side of the table as they eased his body to the floor. Grissom checked for a pulse as Sara loosened the man's collar.

"Ambulance is on its way," called an officer.

"Father Andrew," called Sara. "Stay with me…help is on the way." She glanced up at Grissom as more tears slipped down her cheeks. "It wasn't a confession. He feels guilty…it wasn't a confession!"

"Sara…" began Grissom as he reached for her but she jerked away.

"You just had to push!" she yelled.

The medics arrived as she was pulled to the side by Brass.

Sara rattled off his medical condition as the medics assessed his condition.

"We need to get him to the hospital stat," said one of the medics.

"I'm coming," she said.

"Are you family?" asked the medic.

"Yes, I am," she said.

Grissom stood there and watched as she followed the medics.

"You should go to the hospital," whispered Brass.

"That was a confession, wasn't it?" asked Catherine.

Grissom said nothing. He was too engrossed in replaying the emotions that were displayed on Sara's face.

_She's going to be so hurt if he…._

Note from author:

I hope everyone has survived the holidays. Let's continue with the story. I've enjoyed reading the reviews! Please continue to leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen:**

When he stepped into the hospital hallway he found her in much the same position as she appeared that night at the police station. She sat there in a chair with her hands clasped together as she waited for news. He started toward her when a doctor appeared.

"Sara?"

"Yes," she said quickly as she sat up.

"He's in stable condition," said Doctor Holmes.

"Did he…uhm have a heart attack?" she asked.

"We're running some tests but I don't think so. I believe it was a combination of stress and blood pressure," said Doctor Holmes.

"Can I see him?" she asked.

"Yes, give the nurse a few minutes and then you can go in. Have you been able to convince him…"

"I'm trying," she replied.

"Keep trying," urged Doctor Holmes as he walked away.

Sara leaned back and sighed out loud.

Grissom sat down beside her.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Shouldn't you be asking about Father Andrew?" she asked sounding hurt.

"I overheard the doctor," he said softly. "I'm now asking about you."

She stared toward the hospital door. "I'm fine."

He started to take her hand but stopped when he saw a police officer walking down the hall.

She noticed the almost gesture but stood as soon as she saw the officer stop at Father Andrew's door.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I was sent here to guard Father…"

"Who sent you?" asked Sara angrily.

"I did," replied Grissom.

Sara whirled around to face him.

"He didn't do anything wrong!"

"Sara…"

"You can't do this. He's not been charged formally!" she yelled.

"Sara, his statement could be construed as a confession," he said softly.

"It wasn't and you know it! You're just trying to get back at him," she glared.

"Would you excuse us for a moment?" asked Grissom to the officer.

"I'll get a cup of coffee and then come back," said the officer.

"Thank you," said Grissom. He waited until the officer was gone before he turned to Sara.

"Did it ever occur to you that if Andrew is innocent, he may know who the killer is and they will try to quiet him if they fear he's going to divulge their identity?"

"Father Andrew would never do that," she said. "He won't violate his vows."

"Technically he's retired," said Grissom. "He was just filling in for Father Powell as a favor."

"Once a priest always a priest," breathed Sara.

"Do you want to take that risk?" asked Grissom.

Sara was silent for a moment.

"I don't want him to think he's being arrested," she warned.

"I don't want him upset….you have no evidence against Father Andrew so if you're thinking of charging him, I'm calling an attorney," she said in a huff.

He wanted to kiss her right then and there.

Sara Sidle was loyal.

"Not at the moment," said Brass.

They both turned and saw Jim standing there with the officer.

"I agree with Grissom. Someone may try to silence Father Andrew," said Brass.

"As long as you understand that if you shift to charging him, he will be represented by an attorney," warned Sara.

She started to go inside the room but stopped. "No more questions."

"Sara, you know we have to ask him about that last statement he made," said Brass.

"He's right," said Grissom.

"You're not getting in this room without his doctor's approval…and mine," she demanded.

She shut the door and left the men standing there.

"This is going to be fun," muttered Brass. "Remind me if I ever get into any trouble to have Sara on my side."

Sara sat down beside the bed and took his hand in hers.

He moved slightly.

His lips moved but she could not make out what he was saying. She stood now as she pressed her face next to his.

"Emily," he whispered. "I need Emily."

"You want me to bring Emily Grissom here?" she asked.

"Please," he begged.

"I don't know how to contact her," she said.

"Apartment," he said before nodding off.

She searched his clothing and found his keys as she stepped out of the room.

She seemed annoyed that Grissom and Brass were still there.

Greg hurried down the hall.

"The lab results just came in," said Greg glancing at Sara.

All eyes were on Sara.

"They didn't match," she said. "Father Andrew's DNA did not match the victim's."

"She's right," admitted Greg. "But it did match the DNA found on the victim in California twenty years ago."

Brass and Grissom exchanged glances.

"The officer remains at the door at all times," said Brass.

The officer nodded.

Sara headed down the hall but Grissom stopped her.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I have something I need to do," she replied.

"Wait, a minute ago you weren't leaving his side and now you're running an errand," said Grissom stepping forward. "Whose errand is it?"

She looked at both of them.

"It's for Father Andrew," said Sara.

"I'll go with you," offered Grissom.

"No, you're not," she said.

"Then you're not going," declared Grissom.

Brass and Greg looked at one another.

"You can't keep me from leaving," she said sounding irritated.

"Sara, it's for your own protection," piped in Brass.

"You're not going," she said with arms crossed.

"I'll go…with her," offered Greg.

"Fine. Greg can come," she said as she headed down the hall.

She stopped and looked back.

"Are you coming?" she asked Greg.

Grissom nodded. "Don't let her out of your sight and keep your guard up."

Greg hurried down the hall and caught up with Sara.

"What do you think she's doing?" asked Brass.

"Getting in over her head," muttered Grissom.

"Hasn't she already done that?" asked Brass as he walked away.

Sara slid into the passenger side of Greg's car.

"Where to?" asked Greg.

"Father Andrew's apartment," she said.

"Wait, don't we need a search warrant?" he asked.

"We're not looking for evidence," she said angrily.

"Okay," he said as he pulled out of the parking lot and headed out.

"Going to tell me what we're going to look for?" asked Greg.

"I'll tell you when we find it," she said.

She started to unlock the apartment and heard a noise inside. She stopped immediately as they pulled out their weapons.

"Maybe we should call for back up," whispered Greg.

Sara heard the door click and then it was thrust open.

They stood face to face with an elderly woman.

Sara smiled. "Hello Emily. Father Andrew sent me."

The woman glanced at the two holding guns and she stepped away from the door.

Sara quickly signed something to her and the woman seemed relieved. She signed something back as Greg stood there looking baffled.

"When did you learn sign?" asked Greg.

"Since Warrick and I had the case where the deaf boy was killed and I learned that Grissom knew how to sign. I decided to learn," she explained.

"You just didn't like the fact that he knew something that you didn't," snickered Greg.

"Perhaps," said Sara.

"Greg, this is Emily. Emily this is Greg. We work with Gil Grissom."

She smiled.

"Andrew is sick. He's in the hospital," said Sara.

"I want to see him," she said urgently.

"That's why we're here," said Sara. "He's asking for you."

The woman grabbed her sweater and purse.

Sara was relieved when Brass and Grissom were no longer at the hospital. Emily sat down in a chair. "I'll come and get you in just a minute," said Sara.

Sara pulled Greg over. "Stay with her for a few minutes."

Greg nodded.

Sara slipped inside the room.

Sara took his hand and she smiled when his eyes opened.

"I have Emily," she said.

He smiled.

Greg sat down beside the elderly woman. He gently lifted a few hairs from the sweater and smiled when he noticed some skin tags. Sara stepped out of the room and motioned for Emily.

The officer said nothing as the women stepped inside.

Emily took Father Andrew's hand.

"My Emily," he whispered.

"I was worried when you did not come home," she said as she wiped the tears from her face. "I was so worried."

"I'm fine Emily," he soothed.

He took her hand and kissed the palm.

"Don't want to lose you," sobbed Emily.

_She really loves him…_

_He really loves her…_

"I'll leave you two alone for awhile," said Sara as she stepped out of the room.

She walked over to Greg.

"I need to get back to the lab," he said.

"Thanks for coming Greg."

"Who is she?" asked Greg.

"Someone from the church," lied Sara.

She sat down in the chair and watched as Greg disappeared. She leaned back and closed her eyes. She was exhausted. She had just met Grissom's mother. She did not look the way she imagined she would. Gil did not look like his mother.

Greg hurried into the lab and ran toward Catherine.

"Listen, you know that female DNA found on the victims?" asked Greg.

"Yeah?" asked Catherine.

"There was a woman in Father Andrew's apartment. I got these," he said smiling. He held up the hair samples in a plastic bag.

"Good going Greggo," smiled Catherine.

"I'll run these and get back with you," said Greg.

Greg disappeared into the lab.

He returned an hour later and handed the results to Catherine.

"It's a match," said Greg.

Catherine smiled. "Let's tell Brass. Grissom is tied up with Ecklie going over a speech he's going to feed to the media about the latest victims. They have to give them something before panic breaks out."

Sara glanced at her watch and then walked back into the hospital room.

Emily was sitting quietly with Father Andrew who was sleeping.

"How is he?" Sara whispered.

"Tired," said Mrs. Grissom.

"Emily, did he tell you about…"

"He had nothing to do with these murders. My Gil knows Andrew is not capable of anything like that."

Sara smiled at how she referred to Grissom.

"Did he tell you who is behind…"

Sara was interrupted by a knock on the door. The officer stuck his head inside the door. "Captain Brass is here to see you."

Sara stepped outside.

"Sara, is Father Andrew's friend still inside?" he asked.

"Yes."

"We need to take her down for questioning," said Brass.

Sara's mouth dropped open.

"You're kidding, right?" she finally asked.

"No, her DNA was found on the crucifix found in Jimmy Robert's hand," said Brass.

Sara closed her eyes. "This is a mistake…a big mistake."

"I have my orders," said Brass. "Grissom is going to meet us there."

"He better," muttered Sara. "And he better be prepared to have his ass kicked."

Brass covered the smile on his face.

"It won't be by me," added Sara.

Brass looked a little confused but said nothing.

Sara disappeared into the room and then returned with the elderly woman.

Sara held the woman's hand as they stepped into the lab. Brass opened the door to the interrogation room and the women stepped inside.

"Sara, it's not necessary…"

"Emily is deaf. You'll need someone to sign. I can," she said.

Brass glanced down at the woman and then back at Sara.

"Oh shit," whispered Brass.

"Holy shit," whispered Sara. "You better get his ass down here since he just brought in his own mother."

Note from author:

Yeah, things are going to get interesting now…

Take care,

Penny


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen:**

Grissom stepped into the room and froze.

He stared at Brass and Sara.

"You said to bring her in for questioning," said Brass.

"Her DNA was on the crucifix?" asked Grissom.

Emily looked up and saw her son.

"Hello Gilbert," she said.

Brass turned and hung his head as he tried to hide the urge to snicker.

"Mother…I didn't know you were in town," said Grissom as he kissed his mother on the forehead.

"You would know if you called more often," she pouted.

Sara grinned but quickly removed it from her face as Grissom glared in her direction.

"Mom…"

"Was it your idea to bring me here?" she asked.

"Mom…"

"Gilbert, I'm disappointed in you," Emily said.

Brass and Sara exchanged glances as they sat side by side.

Grissom remained standing in the middle of the room.

"Sit down Gilbert," said Mrs. Grissom.

Grissom said nothing as he pulled out a chair and sat at the end of the table.

"_Can't even sit beside your own mother?"_ she signed.

"This is not a social call," said Grissom. "Mom, your DNA was found…"

"This should be a social call and look at me when you're talking," she said.

Grissom turned directly at his mother.

He quickly began to sign. _"I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you but even if I did, we would still be here. We need to have some answers."_

Emily smiled. _"I'm glad you're keeping up with your sign,"_ she said. Emily turned to Sara and began to sign to Sara. _"My son has told me a lot about you. Are you two involved?"_

Sara quickly signed back. "_He's my boss. I'm his employee."_

Emily responded in sign. "_Quit. He needs a wife."_

Grissom's jaw dropped open.

He stared at his mother and then Sara.

"When did you learn how to sign?" asked Grissom to Sara.

Sara just smiled and said nothing.

"Hello…I'm not getting any of this," said Brass. "I can't sign."

Brass pulled out the crucifix from the envelope.

"Do you recognize this?" asked Brass.

"Yes," said Emily.

"Does it belong to Father Andrew?" asked Brass.

"No."

Brass and Grissom looked confused.

"Are you sure?" asked Grissom.

She turned and looked at her son. "Gilbert, that's my crucifix."

"It was found on the body of a young boy," said Brass.

"When we were young, our parents had gotten us matching rosary beads. I lost my crucifix twenty years ago…it just disappeared. It was the strangest thing. Andrew gave me his so I later got him a different one. My crucifix disappeared a couple of weeks ago. I didn't think anything about it since I'm old and I misplace things every day," she said.

Grissom's hand came to rest on his mother's. "Mom, do you have any idea where you might have lost it?"

She looked down at her hands. She pulled her hand away and folded them in her lap.

"You accused Andrew twenty years ago of…" she looked directly at Grissom. "You knew he was not capable of doing anything like that."

"No, I didn't," he countered.

She gasped causing him to flinch.

"Then that is my fault," she said sadly. She breathed in deeply. "Andrew never committed those murders twenty years ago because on the night they were committed…he was with me."

Sara sucked in air.

Brass sat quietly.

"What are you saying?" asked Grissom.

Mrs. Grissom looked directly at Grissom.

"You know exactly what I'm saying. Andrew would never divulge who he was with that night. He was with me all night. He spent the night at my house," she said.

You could have heard a pin drop in the room.

"Gil, I've loved Andrew all my life," she said. "He did not commit these murders…neither did I."

"I never thought…" Grissom stopped. "The other day…"

"Andrew called me…he told me about the surgery. I came even though he asked me not to. I've been staying at his apartment."

Brass kept his eyes on the notepad on the table.

His hand quietly slipped into Sara's under the table.

"If there is anyone guilty here…it's me," said Emily Grissom. "After your father died, Andrew was willing to give up the priesthood to be a father to you…I wouldn't let him so I sent him away."

She swiped at her eyes and looked at Grissom. "You were angry all these years for something that I did."

"Why did you…do that?" asked Grissom.

"Because you wanted to enter the priesthood and I didn't want that. I gave up Andrew…it was the hardest thing I ever did but I did it because he was meant to be a priest…I was selfish when it came to you. I wasn't going to give you…for the church. I wanted you to marry and have children."

Brass's hand tightened on Sara's.

"You never did anyway," she said. "I guess that was God punishing me for not letting you…"

"You were right. I didn't belong to the church. I belong here," he said quietly.

"You've punished Andrew all these years for my decision," she said.

She looked at her son. "Stop punishing him. If you want to punish anyone, then punish me. He loves you like…his own son," she said as she began to cry.

Brass and Sara immediately got up and left the two alone.

Once the door was closed Sara leaned against the wall. "Father Andrew was protecting Emily. He admitted the crucifix belonged to him but never told us he had given it to her. I need a drink," she said.

"Me too," replied Brass.

Brass leaned toward her. "You still love me…don't you?"

"Always," she said.

Brass hugged her tight. "He loves you…you know."

She said nothing as she stared into the interrogation room. She could see that Grissom was signing to his mother, stopping from time to time to caress her cheek before continuing.

She watched the man she loved as he consoled his mother.

She jumped when her phone went off.

"It's the hospital," she said to Brass.

She swallowed hard. "I need to get Emily back to the hospital," she said quietly. "Father Andrew…is in surgery."

"I'm sorry Sara," said Brass.

"He uhm went into cardiac arrest," she choked. "It's not good."

She paced the halls as they waited.

Hours went by.

Grissom sat there beside his mother as he watched Sara pace.

"I like her," whispered Emily.

He said nothing as he got up and blocked her path.

"You're wearing out the tile," he chided.

"I'm not good at waiting," she admitted.

"Come with me for coffee," he said.

She glanced over at Mrs. Grissom.

"I like her," Sara whispered.

"The feeling is mutual," he said as he quickly signed to his mother.

She smiled and replied.

They sat down in the cafeteria.

She held the cup in her hand as she stared at the table.

"My mother and I talked a lot about…what happened," he said.

"Still think Father Andrew could do such a thing?" she asked now staring at Grissom.

"No," he admitted.

"They should be finished by now," she groaned.

"Sara, I want to thank you for staying by his side through all of this," said Grissom.

"You can repay me by talking with him…really talking," she sniffled.

He nodded.

"Gil?"

His head jerked up by the use of his first name.

"We need to talk with your mom about the crucifix…she loses two…someone she was with took them…we need to find out who else was with your mother," she said.

"Never thought I would ever be having a conversation with my mother in which she admits to…sleeping with someone," he said.

Sara grinned. "She didn't say that. She just said she spent the night with him."

"Should I ask my mother to clarify whether they actually…"

"You want her to call you Gilbert again?" teased Sara.

He smiled and was silent.

"Does it matter? They've loved each other for years…before you were ever born…does it matter if they did? They're both alone…he is retired…I know I know…once a priest always a…" she stopped as she looked past Grissom.

"What is it?" asked Grissom.

"There's a priest…Father Powell is behind you," said Sara.

"Dr. Grissom," said Father Powell. "Has there been any word on Andrew's condition?"

"Not yet," said Grissom.

"I was with him when he had the…I tried to get him to calm down. He was so upset," said Father Powell sitting down.

"Upset?" asked Sara.

"I'd never seen him like that. He uhm kept saying Emily would never understand. I told him I would get Emily for him but he became agitated and said he didn't want to see her…not after what he'd done," said Father Powell.

"What had he done?" asked Grissom.

"He wanted me to forgive him. He wanted forgiveness before he died…he kept saying those two boys' names over and over."

Sara glanced briefly at Grissom. "He cared a lot for those boys."

Father Powell leaned back in the chair. "He uhm handed me this key. It's the key to his room at the church."

"Room?" asked Sara. "He has an apartment."

"The church gives each priest and visiting priest a room in order for them to dress, leave personal belongings or just meditate in privacy," said Father Powell. "I gave this to Andrew when he arrived. He insisted on getting an apartment."

Father Powell breathed in deeply. "I don't think Andrew has any family. I uhm don't know what to do with his personal effects."

"He has family," said Sara quickly as she snatched the key.

"He has family," she repeated as she left the cafeteria.

Grissom excused himself and headed after her. He found her looking out the window near one of the waiting rooms.

"You okay?" he asked quietly.

"He lied," fumed Sara.

"Who?" asked Grissom fearful she was now having doubts about Andrew.

"Father Powell," said Sara. She turned with her arms folded. He could tell she was on the verge of tears.

"Father Andrew took me on a tour of the church. He mentioned the rooms in the back and even opened them for me. They were not locked. He said he never used it," said Sara. "He liked to keep his home separate from the church because he needed to know that he was also a man and not just a priest….besides, he said the church should never be locked…it belonged to the community. Griss, I never saw a door that was locked."

Grissom looked at the key. "Why do you think Father Powell mentioned the key?"

"He wants us to believe Father Andrew killed those boys. He didn't Grissom. He could never harm another living soul. There were witnesses that said they saw a priest with the last victim."

"You think it was Father Powell?" whispered Grissom.

"He was with Father Andrew when he suffered the heart attack. Father Andrew begged me to get your mother….he thought he was dying. He wanted to see her. He would never refuse to see her Grissom. Powell is lying."

"Motive?" he whispered.

"I don't know. I don't care. He's not getting near Father Andrew," she said.

He smiled. "He's lucky to have you as a friend."

"No. I'm lucky he saw me…really me," she said as she swiped at her eyes and walked back to the waiting room.

Sara ignored Powell's presence while they waited. Mrs. Grissom sat down beside Sara and patted her hand.

Sara turned and looked at her. _"You love him. Don't you?"_ Emily Grissom signed.

"_Yes, I do. I love Father Andrew very much," _signed Sara.

"_I meant my son,"_ signed Emily Grissom.

Sara glanced over and saw Grissom speaking softly to Brass.

"_Yes, I do but…"_

"_He loves you too," _signed Mrs. Grissom.

Sara's eyes shot up when the surgeon walked in.

He came over and sat down beside Sara.

"Sara, he's in recovery," announced Dr. Holmes.

Sara smiled as she sighed out loud.

"His condition is critical. There was more damage than we anticipated…Sara, he has a strong will to live but…I want to prepare you."

Sara's smile faded.

"He's unconscious. He…may never wake up."

She stared at the surgeon's face.

"Never?" she whispered.

"I'm sorry Sara," said the surgeon as he left.

Sara's hand instinctively covered Emily's.

She turned and looked at Emily. By her expression, Sara knew the old woman was able to understand the surgeon.

"He can't leave me now," whispered Mrs. Grissom. "I've wasted so much time."

Grissom came over and knelt down in front of his mother. _"Are you okay?" _he signed.

She slowly shook her head.

"_What can I do?" _He asked.

"Pray," she said out loud.

"I have been," said Grissom. "I'm not sure God remembers who I am."

"_My son would not say such a thing,"_ she signed.

"_Your son stopped praying a long time ago. I blamed God more than Andrew…Father Andrew."_

"_Your father died. It was his time. It wasn't your fault,"_ signed Mrs. Grissom.

"_I should have told you he hadn't been feeling well. Maybe…" _Mrs. Grissom grabbed his hands quickly.

"I knew," she said out loud. "There was very little your father could keep from me. I didn't heed the warning signs. I thought he might be seriously ill but I never pushed him to seek medical attention. I should have…" It was her son's turn to stop her.

"It was his time. I just wasn't ready to let him go," Grissom said.

Grissom glanced over at Sara.

His hand rested on Sara's.

"You okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she said as she got up.

"Sara…"

He stood quickly and grabbed her arm. "I'm worried…about you," he whispered.

"I need to do something," she said. "I'm going to ask Greg to bring…"

"He's on his way with the case files on both victims," he whispered. "I thought you could look over them while you wait to see Father Andrew."

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Jim is checking on some things," said Grissom. "Sara…be careful."

She nodded as she headed down the hall.

He wanted to go after her but he knew she was having a difficult time holding in her emotions.

He also hated the fact he needed to return to the lab.

He spoke with his mother and then left not sure if he was doing the right thing.

_Always the job…_

He cursed.

Note from author:

Thanks so much for the reviews. Please continue to leave them. This is your ten chapter warning...yes, there are only twenty five chapters.

Take care,

Penny


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen:**

Hours passed and he returned once shift ended. He found Sara asleep in the waiting room. He gently nudged her.

"Sara, you should go home," he said.

"Your mother wouldn't leave so I promised to stay here…be near him in case…" she yawned.

"How much sleep have you had?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she said sitting up. "Your mother is at the hotel across the street. I walked her over there a few hours ago."

"Thank you," he said. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay. I needed to get back to the lab."

"I understand…really I do," she said as she handed him the files. "I looked over them. There were also traces of male DNA left behind on one of the boys. If we could get a DNA sample from Powell and compare it to the …."

"Sara, we have no reason to request the sample."

"Maybe he'll volunteer," said Sara.

"And tip his hand?" asked Grissom.

She glanced up and saw Father Powell walk into the waiting room.

"How is he?" asked Father Powell.

"He's in critical condition," replied Sara. "We're uhm going to go down and give blood…I thought you would want to join us."

"Uhm yes," he said. "It's been years since I've given but anything to help."

"Thank you," smiled Sara. "It would mean a lot."

Grissom watched as they walked down the hall. She snatched Greg who had arrived earlier to give Grissom an update on some cases.

"Where are we going?" asked Greg.

"We have a date," said Sara.

Greg smiled. "We do?"

"Yes, we do," said Sara.

They returned an hour later.

"Got the sample?" whispered Grissom.

"Greg is taking it to the lab," she said rubbing her arm.

"Sit down. You don't look good," he warned.

She felt herself being shoved into a seat.

"This is the second time I've lost a pint of blood for this job," she mused.

"You should eat something," he said.

Brass walked up with bag in hand. "Did someone say food?"

Sara smiled. "I love you."

Brass smiled as Grissom frowned.

Sara ate part of the sandwich and pickle before nodding off to sleep. Grissom placed a blanket over her as he sat there across from her.

"You should send her home," scowled Brass.

"She wants to be here…in case anything happens to Father Andrew," whispered Grissom.

"It's really going to hurt her if he dies," said Brass.

Grissom nodded.

"How are you?" asked Brass.

"Me?"

"Sara's not the only person who cares for Father Andrew."

Grissom said nothing.

He wasn't sure how he would feel if he never got the chance to talk with the man.

He did not have time to consider his own feelings as he mother returned and his focus turned to her.

She tried to pretend she was strong but he knew she was quite fragile.

_So much like Sara…_

He remembered Father Andrew's words in the interrogation room and he smiled.

_Yes, she is like her…_

He watched his mother leave the intensive care unit. Sara jerked awake and scrambled to her feet. She spoke briefly to Emily before she took her turn in Andrew's room.

Mrs. Grissom sat down in the chair.

"Are you hungry?" Grissom asked his mother.

"I couldn't eat," she said.

They watched as Sara disappeared down the hall.

"Sara should go to the hotel for awhile," said Mrs. Grissom.

"She doesn't want to leave him," replied Grissom.

"She loves him very much….he loves her too….he told me," she said sadly.

"Mom, you should rest," he urged. "Why don't I walk you over to the hotel?"

"I think she needs you more than I need you," said Mrs. Grissom. "Andrew's condition has worsened."

"I'd be happy to walk you over to the hotel," offered Brass.

"Thank you," she said.

Grissom waited until they were out of sight before he went in search of Sara.

He wasn't prepared to find her in the hospital chapel. He glanced in and found her lighting a candle. She stood there at the altar and then fell to her knees. He knew she was crying by the way her shoulders shook.

He cursed inwardly as he stepped away.

He stood outside the chapel for several minutes before glancing back in.

She now sat in the front row.

Grissom stepped inside and sat down beside her.

"Mom told me his condition has gotten worse," he said softly.

"He's going to die," she announced.

"We don't know that," he whispered.

"I don't think I can bear to lose him," she admitted.

"Me either," said Grissom. "I need his forgiveness."

"He forgave you years ago."

"There's so much I need to tell him," said Grissom. "Things I need to explain."

"Me too," she admitted.

They both sat there quietly.

"I uhm never prayed before," she said. "I never asked for anything even when my father got drunk and lost his temper. I never prayed…never asked…you think he'll hear me now? I've done nothing but pray and he's gotten worse. I can't lose him Grissom. I don't know what I'll do."

His arm drew her closer to him.

His hand gently stroked her hair.

"He's strong Sara," he whispered.

"Have you prayed? Maybe God will listen…"

Grissom turned her so they were facing.

"If Father Andrew dies, it was his time. You…"

She pushed him away as she stood abruptly.

"You don't care! You don't care whether he lives or dies! You had a father that loved you. I was just beginning to feel as if…" she covered her mouth.

"Father Andrew filled a void in your life. There's no shame in admitting that, Sara. He loves you as much as you love him."

"I don't want him to die, Grissom. I'm so tired of death."

Grissom slowly stepped forward.

"I have prayed. I haven't stopped."

"I'm sorry," she blurted out. "I'm so sorry."

He wrapped his arms around her.

"I didn't mean it. I didn't…"

His lips hushed her.

He gently planted kisses on her cheeks and forehead.

"I've wanted to do that since…"

She stepped back and tried to compose herself.

"I know…we have to be discreet…not draw attention," she whispered.

"I don't like hiding," he professed.

"I don't mind as long as…you don't hide from me," she confessed.

"Not anymore. I promise."

His hand held hers until she opened the door and stepped out into the hallway.

They returned to the waiting room just as Brass returned.

Sara slumped down into a chair.

Brass grabbed Grissom's elbow and led him away.

"How is she holding up?" he whispered.

"I'm worried about her," responded Grissom.

"Now, I'm really worried," growled Brass.

A nurse appeared and Sara hurried over.

"You can visit with him," she announced.

Sara glanced at Grissom.

She was surprised when his hand slipped into hers and he led her to the door.

"Is it okay if we visit him together?" asked Grissom.

"Just for a few minutes," replied the nurse.

Brass grinned as he watched the two disappear.

_About damn time!_

Sara's eyes glanced from one machine to the next. She followed the tubes to the machine and then back. Grissom watched her intently as her hand slipped from his and into Father Andrew's.

Grissom looked at the chart and then the monitors.

"His heart rate is good. Blood pressure is good also," he reported.

"He's not waking up," Sara mumbled.

"That's not uncommon for a man his age," assured Grissom.

"You're not worried?" she asked.

"I didn't… say that," he stammered.

Grissom took Andrew's other hand.

Sara tried not to stare as Grissom closed his eyes and began to recite something in Latin.

"A prayer for the dying?" she asked.

"A prayer for the living," he corrected.

Both were quiet.

"My mother should have left the decision to me," he whispered.

His statement startled Sara.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

He did not get to reply as the nurse signaled the visit would have to come to an end.

They both returned to the waiting room.

He was surprised when his phone went off.

"Grissom."

He glanced at Sara.

"Log in the evidence and keep me posted."

He closed the phone and stared at Brass.

"What's wrong?" asked Sara.

"Sara, Nick and Warrick searched the room given to Father Andrew at the church."

"You needed a search warrant," she blurted out.

"We got one," said Brass.

She glared at both of them.

"Sara…"

Her hand flew up before Grissom could finish.

"What were you doing? Keeping me busy while he got the warrant? You know that anything found in that room was planted."

"I know," Grissom said.

She cursed as she started to walk away but he grabbed her arm.

"Sara, we had no choice! The DA insisted. Do you think I take any pleasure out of hurting my own mother? Myself? You?"

The argument was disrupted when nurses along with a doctor began running into Father Andrew's room.

Sara's hand covered her mouth as she stared at the room.

She slumped into a chair.

Her head fell into her hands as she sat there not moving.

"I'll try to find out something," whispered Brass as Grissom dropped to his knees in front of Sara.

His hands clasped hers as he feverishly quoted Latin while Sara sat there letting the tears slipped down her face.

Father Powell stood near the entrance.

"I came to give last rites," he announced.

Sara wiped her face as she shook her head.

"Grissom is going to give last rites. Father Andrew requested it."

Grissom's head shot back to Sara.

"You have to go in there," she pleaded. "You…have…to give…last rites."

"I'm not…"

"It was his request Gil. Please!"

Grissom felt himself being pulled to the door.

He glanced back briefly before going inside.

Sara turned and faced Powell.

"I'm sorry for your loss," Powell said as he turned and left.

Sara's hand rested where she normally wore her revolver.

"Wish you had your gun?" asked Brass.

"He's framing Father Andrew," she seethed.

"We're going to get him," assured Brass. "Don't do anything you'll regret."

Her arms folded about herself.

"You okay?" he asked. "It's just you and me…not Grissom or anyone else."

"Did you know Grissom wanted to be a priest?" she asked.

Brass looked surprised.

"It wasn't his calling," replied Brass.

"I'm not so sure about that," she whispered.

Brass glanced at her and then the door. "Nurses wouldn't tell me anything. The alarms were going off so they called the doctor. Where's Grissom?"

"Giving last rites," she choked out.

They stared at one another.

"I wasn't about to let Powell in there!" she cried.

"So Grissom went instead?"

"I sent him," she sniffled. "He didn't need to die alone and I know Grissom needed closure more than I do."

Note from author:

Gee, not a good place to end it for the night…wonder how that happened…okay so I like angst…

Leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen:**

Minutes passed and then Grissom stepped out of the room.

Sara held her breath as he approached them.

"He's awake," he whispered.

Sara stared at him in disbelief.

"Sara?"

"He's not dead?" she asked.

Grissom smiled. "He's asking for you and mother. I'm going to walk over and get her. You should go in."

She hurried toward the door.

Grissom sighed out loud.

"Last rites?" asked Brass.

He didn't reply as he headed toward the exit.

Sara kissed him on the cheek as Father Andrew grinned.

"You'll have to sneak in food. I hear the food is worse on this floor than the other one."

"I'll have Grissom make you some soup," she smirked.

"That would be good," he smiled. "Emily?"

"Grissom is getting her," said Sara.

He nodded. "I miss her."

"Did you two talk?" she asked.

"Some…I thought I had died when I heard Grissom reciting last rites."

"That was my fault. I asked Grissom to do that. Father Powell showed up to give them but I wouldn't let him near you."

Andrew's face fell. "He…He uhm…Father Powell…" Sara became frightened as his heart rate soared.

A nurse popped in.

"I'm afraid we're going to have to stop visitation."

Father Andrew latched onto Sara's hand. "Father Powell…"

"Father Andrew," Sara said soothingly. "I know Powell killed those boys. He probably tried to kill you. We're going to get him."

"How did you…"

"Promise me you'll calm down," Sara whispered.

He nodded as he leaned back in the bed. Sara watched as his heart rate slowed.

"That's better," she said smiling. "Wait right here."

Sara leaned out the door and called for Brass.

He stepped into the room.

"I want Jim to hear what we're about to discuss," said Sara. "Okay?"

Father Andrew nodded.

"Did Powell try to hurt you?" she asked.

He nodded. "Pillow."

Sara's jaw twitched. "Was he trying to silence you?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"He came here to tell me I needed to pay for my sins."

"Your sins?" she asked.

"Father Powell was reprimanded when he…had an affair with a young woman. He was sent to a different parish. The woman killed herself. I tried to help him through his grief. We became good friends. Twenty years ago, I introduced him to Emily. Right away he suspected something more than just friendship between us. Emily came and wanted me to try to mend the relationship with Gil. That's when the murders began. Emily's crucifix disappeared. I gave her mine. I wanted to give her so much more but I still belonged to the church. I just let her walk out of my life again."

He took a deep breath and Sara was hesitant to let him continue but he insisted.

"Once I was cleared of the charges, I started over at a new parish. There was no reconciliation. Gil hated me even more. I decided it was best to leave it in the past. Father Powell and I kept in contact with one another. His past always seemed to follow him. He wrote to me one day and asked for me to come to his parish. He told me he needed to get away for awhile. It seems someone in his parish had discovered his past. He heard that I was retiring and begged me to come. I initially said no but then he told me about seeing Gil and I…"

"You thought you might get another chance to reconcile," finished Sara.

He nodded. "Emily came here right after I arrived. She wanted to set up a meeting between Gil and me. She wanted to explain to Gil why we did what we did back then."

"Let me guess, Gil refused," said Sara.

Father Andrew shook his head.

"I refused."

Sara looked shocked.

"I was afraid, Sara," he admitted. "I was afraid how he would react."

"You were afraid for Emily. You didn't want Grissom to be angry with his mother."

He nodded.

Sara shook her head.

"Father Powell came by that day and ran into Emily. He started asking her all kinds of questions about our past."

Sara held her breath.

"Emily's crucifix disappeared that night."

Father Andrew looked at Sara.

"It's my fault those boys died," he whispered. "I never thought Father Powell could do such a thing. It was right there all along and I never saw it Sara. I never realized he killed those boys until that day in the interrogation room. I suspected him then. I wanted to talk with him...find out...get him to turn himself in but when he came here and I told him my suspicions, he tried to kill me."

"It's not your fault. Powell was jealous of your relationship with Emily. He wanted to punish you by killing innocent young boys."

"Why altar boys?" asked Brass.

"Gil was an altar boy," whispered Father Andrew. "The woman who killed herself was pregnant with his child. He was jealous of my relationship with Emily…and Gil."

"Gil didn't want anything to do with you," replied Brass.

Sara eyes locked with Father Andrew.

"Powell wanted someone to feel the same pain he had felt. He focused on you because of your long term relationship with Emily. He knew you loved Gil as if he were your own son. He felt your love violated your oath to the church."

Father Andrew nodded slowly.

"This is all circumstantial," said Brass.

"Not if we can get Powell to admit to any or all of it," said Sara. "He thinks Father Andrew is not going to make it. Maybe he'll confess once we corner him."

"Where's Emily?' asked Father Andrew.

"Grissom went to get her," said Sara.

"He should have been back by now," stated Brass.

Sara glanced at Brass.

"I'll uhm go check on them," she said to Father Andrew as she dragged Brass out of the room.

Once they were in the hallway, Brass spoke. "Don't trust me with the man?"

"He needs to rest," said Sara. "Why isn't Grissom back?"

As time passed and Grissom did not return, they found themselves walking over to the hotel.

They knocked lightly on the hotel room but no one answered.

Sara called Grissom's phone but there was no answer.

"Mrs. Grissom could be in there but not hear us," cautioned Sara.

"I'll call security," offered Brass.

Security arrived with a key and Sara unlocked the door. Mrs. Grissom seemed startled when she saw Sara enter the room. Sara quickly signed. _"Father Andrew is awake. Have you seen Gil?"_

Sara's stomach lurched when she shook her head.

Her panic mode went into over drive when Brass stepped into the room and held up Grissom's phone. "Security found this lying in the stairwell."

Sara and Brass exchanged glances.

Sara turned her back to Mrs. Grissom. "Jim, I'll take her to Father Andrew's room. I don't want to upset her unless we have to."

"I'll put out an APB for Grissom. Security just checked and his vehicle is missing."

Minutes later Sara returned.

"Anything?" she asked anxiously.

Brass shook her head.

"Any sign of Father Powell?" asked Sara.

"APB turned up nothing so far," said Brass.

Nick and Warrick arrived.

"Any news?" asked Nick.

Sara shook her head.

Brass grabbed his phone when it went off.

"Brass."

"Where?"

Brass glanced at Sara.

"We're on our way," he called.

"Grissom's car was found parked in front of Father Andrew's apartment," said Brass.

They hurried to the address.

Sara sat there in the passenger side while Brass drove.

She glanced at Brass. "Powell has Grissom."

"Maybe," said Brass. "No one has spotted Powell."

Once Brass arrived, Sara ran to Father Andrew's apartment.

An officer arrived at the same time.

Sara fumbled in her pockets and produced a key.

She stopped.

"I smell gas," she whispered.

The officer attempted to stop her but she plowed through the door as the lock clicked.

She covered her mouth as she searched the small apartment, finding Grissom unconscious on the bed.

The officer quickly opened the windows.

"Call 911!" yelled Sara as she attempted to get Grissom conscious.

"Griss!"

She attempted to move him but she knew she could not lift his weight.

"Jim!"

Nick and Warrick rushed in as she heard Brass calling for an ambulance.

"We need to get him out of here," she pleaded.

She swallowed when she saw his hand handcuffed to the bedpost.

"We need something to get the cuffs off!" she yelled.

Warrick ran out.

Sara's fingers checked for a pulse.

"Oh God, he's not breathing!" she cried.

She quickly began mouth to mouth.

Brass and Nick scurried around and attempted to open the other windows.

Sara continued her vigilance as the guys waited for Warrick to return.

The others kept their mouths covered as Sara continued.

Warrick soon returned with a bolt cutter.

The guys quickly lifted Grissom.

They did not stop until he was outside.

Sara quickly checked for a pulse.

She went into work mode again as she began mouth to mouth.

"Breathe Grissom!" yelled Nick.

Sara continued until she felt lightheaded.

"Sara, let us help," offered Warrick.

She continued.

_Breathe…_

_Just breathe Grissom…_

_Please breathe…_

She began to cry when Nick yelled, "I've got a pulse."

Sara stopped as she watched his chest move up and down. Her hand rested on it lightly, not wanting to trust her own eyes.

"He's…still… unconscious," she stammered.

The medics took over but she continued to sit by his side.

She listened as they barked out codes between one another.

"How long was he exposed?" asked one of the medics.

"We don't know," she gasped. "He wasn't breathing when we got here."

She struggled to get up and felt hands lifting her as the medics carried Grissom to the ambulance.

She coughed again and again.

"She's coming with us," called the medic as he grabbed Sara by the arm.

An air mask was thrust over her face as she sat there trying to catch her breath while they continued to work on Grissom.

Once they arrived at the hospital she was forced into another room despite her protests.

"How is he?" she begged.

"He's coming around," assured the nurse.

"I need to be with him," Sara insisted.

Sara slipped the mask off only to be pushed back down.

"You're not going anywhere just yet," declared the nurse.

"Get out of my way!" yelled Sara.

She practically shoved the nurse as she stumbled to the next examining room.

She stopped when she stared at his bright blue eyes. She could not see the grin underneath the oxygen mask.

"Causing trouble again, Sidle?" he asked. His remark caused him to go into a fit of coughing.

"Shut up and breathe," she cursed.

He tried to chuckle but the coughing continued.

She was immediately by his side.

Her hand clutched his.

"You always did take my breath away," he teased.

Note from author:

Yeah…I know…more angst…but hey mouth to mouth... I have really enjoyed the reviews. Please keep them coming.

Take care,

Penny


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen:**

He felt helpless when she suddenly burst into tears.

Her head rested on his chest as he attempted to comfort her while she cried.

Brass and the others stood at the entrance.

"I was so scared Griss," she sobbed.

"I'm sorry," he soothed.

"All I could think about was making you breathe," she sniffled.

"You did mouth to mouth?" he asked.

She nodded.

"I'm honored," he announced.

"She wouldn't let any of us help," called Nick.

Grissom glanced at the others.

His hand continued to stroke Sara's hair as she continued to sob into his chest.

Grissom motioned for the others to leave.

"Let's give them a few minutes," said Brass to the others.

They stepped away from the entrance.

"We need to ask him some questions," said Warrick.

"Someone has to process him," added Nick.

"I think it can wait a few minutes," replied Brass.

"About Father Andrew," whispered Nick. "You know we found enough in the room at the church to arrest him."

"Let's keep that to ourselves for now," said Brass.

Nick and Warrick looked at one another.

"He didn't do it," said Brass. "I'm sure we'll find that out in just a few minutes."

Sara swiped at her eyes.

"I'm sorry," she groaned. "I didn't mean to have a meltdown."

"I'm sorry I scared you," he said trying not to cough again but failing miserably.

"Mr. Grissom, you shouldn't be talking," warned the nurse.

"Stop talking," she begged.

He released her hand and signed. _"I'm not going to die."_

Her head went down again and she cried harder.

Nick's head popped back into the room.

"Is he okay?" asked Nick nervously.

Brass grabbed his arm and pulled him away.

"He's fine," said Brass.

"But…"

Brass pulled him further away.

Grissom slowly tapped on her arm.

She lifted her head and he smiled.

"_Tell Jim to arrest Powell." _Grissom signed.

"Did he do this to you?" she asked.

He nodded.

"Did he tell you why he killed those boys and tried to kill you?"asked Sara.

"_He wanted to punish Father Andrew," _Grissom signed.

"Why?"

"_He felt it wasn't right for Father Andrew to love my mother,"_ he signed.

"How were you…"

"_He was heading to my mother's room. He decided to take me instead…punish both of them because they sinned in the eyes of the church."_

"Bastard," Sara seethed.

"_I'm glad I got there before he…"_ Grissom did not finish.

"You're mother probably would not have survived. You're young."

_She thinks I'm young?_

He looked at her in a strange way.

"What?"

"_Mouth to mouth?" _he signed.

"Would you have preferred I let Brass?"

He chuckled sending himself into another fit of coughing.

"Okay, Mr. Grissom. That's enough," warned the nurse.

He lifted the mask over the protest of the nurse.

He gently pulled Sara down and kissed her.

"You can give me mouth to mouth anytime."

He didn't care when he began to cough again or the curses by Sara or the looks made by the nurse. He was content to know that Sara had breathed life into him, once again.

"You have to be processed," she said. "Mind if I do it?"

He shook his head.

She stepped out and was met by the others.

"How is he?" asked Brass.

"Grissom told me it was Powell. You can issue the warrant now…that's two counts of attempted murder….Father Andrew…and Grissom."

Brass picked up his phone and began making the call while Sara quietly answered questions from the others.

"Nick, I need to borrow your kit," she said.

"I can do it," he replied.

"No one is touching him except me," she said matter of fact.

Brass chuckled.

Sara returned to the room, sitting down next to Grissom.

He watched as she prepped for any crime scene.

She inhaled deeply and then picked up his hand.

Gently, she scraped under his fingernails.

His wrists were bruised and bloodied from his attempts to remove the handcuffs.

Sara meticulously collected the samples. Once she was done, she placed the evidence in the bag and stood.

A nurse was waiting.

"We're going to run a few tests on Mr. Grissom before taking him to his room. It may a few hours before you can see him again," said the nurse.

"Call me when he's been placed in a room," instructed Sara as she handed the nurse her card.

Sara then turned to Grissom and caressed his cheek.

"I'll be back," she whispered. "I'll take this to the lab and then I'm coming back."

"Go home," he managed to get out.

She shook her head.

"Sara…" he went into a fit of coughing.

"If he tries to open his mouth again, tape it shut," instructed Sara.

She leaned over and kissed him on the mouth.

He grinned. "Sorry, I don't….remember the mouth…to…mouth."

"Tape," she warned.

He closed his eyes and Sara took it as her cue to leave.

She stepped out into the hallway with the evidence.

"You okay?" asked Nick.

Warrick tried to take the evidence from her but she refused to relinquish it.

"I'm going to run this," she said.

"Wait, this is our case," said Nick.

"This is my evidence. I collected it. I'm running it," she declared.

Warrick and Nick stared at one another.

"Good. I'm glad we got that settled," breathed Sara.

Brass chuckled as he watched her leave with the evidence in hand.

She logged in the evidence and then began sifting through it.

"I heard about Grissom," said Greg.

"He's going to be fine," responded Sara not sure whom she was trying to convince.

"Need some help?" asked Greg.

Sara glanced at him.

"Just help," he offered.

"Want to process the handcuffs?" asked Sara.

Greg took the evidence bag. "You think this is the first time Grissom ever wore a pair of these?"

Sara glared at Greg.

"You know the rumors…he and Lady Heather," replied Greg.

"Are you going to help or gossip?" asked Sara.

"I'm going," whined Greg as he hurried from the room to avoid her glare.

Nick and Warrick waved as they walked down the hall.

"Need any help?" called Nick.

Sara shook her head.

Sara sat down and sighed.

She was exhausted and yet the hospital had not called yet.

_He's fine…_

_He's in excellent care…_

_What if they found something?_

_I never even asked what kind of tests they were going to run…_

_Neurological, of course…._

_He was fine…_

_Stop fretting Sara…_

She tested the skin tags found on Grissom's wrist to those found on the previous victim.

It matched.

She then compared it to Father Powell's blood and she smiled when there was another match.

She took the blood sample on Grissom's clothing and compared it to Powell but there was no match.

She then compared it to the other sample and noticed that while it did not match, the blood must have come from a blood relative.

She wiped her brow.

_That can't be…_

She checked the sample again and came up with the same result.

She quickly glanced around to ensure she was alone.

_The other sample belongs to…._

_Father Andrew is Grissom's father…_

She gasped at the realization.

Sara quickly printed the results but then removed it from the database.

Greg's voice startled her.

"Sorry," he murmured. "Found a few skin tags that matched Grissom and Powell."

"Thanks Greg," she replied weakly.

"You okay?" asked Greg.

Sara nodded as her beeper went off. "That's the hospital. Greg, could you take care of this?"

"Sure," said Greg as she took off down the hall.

The cool air felt good as she drove to the hospital. The test results swirled around in her head.

_What do I do?_

_Do I tell Grissom?_

_Do I tell Father Andrew?_

_Maybe he already knows…_

_Grissom doesn't…_

_He worshipped his father…_

_How is he going to react when he finds out it's been a lie?_

_Will he blame his mother?_

_She's suffered enough…_

_Did she know?_

_She had to know…_

_Didn't she?_

_Father Andrew said she had met Gerald Grissom earlier…_

_Maybe Gerald Grissom had always been in love with her…_

_She just accepted him because she couldn't have Father Andrew…_

By the time she arrived at the hospital, her mild headache was now pounding against her temples.

She trudged onto the floor.

She was surprised to see Brass and the guys.

"I paged you for the nurse," said Brass. "They're putting Grissom in a room."

"What were the results of his tests?" asked Sara breathlessly.

"He's going to be fine Sara," said Brass examining her closely.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Tired," she admitted. "What are you two still doing here?"

Nick stepped closer to her.

"Sara, we went back to the lab and just got back here, ourselves," said Nick.

"Yeah, we clocked out but wanted to come by and check on Grissom," added Warrick.

The guys exchanged glances.

"You know maybe you should let them finish checking you out," said Nick.

She slowly inched away from him.

"I'm fine," she professed. "How is Father Andrew?"

"We checked on him. He's doing well," reported Nick.

Sara sighed as she slid down into the nearest chair.

"Come with me," demanded Nick as he tried to pull her from the chair.

"I'm not leaving," she protested.

"Grissom would tell you…."

"Grissom is fine. Father Andrew is with Emily. I'm going to curl up into the first bed as soon as they put Grissom in a room," replied Sara.

Nick glanced at the others.

"You're not moving me!" she threatened.

Brass slowly shook his head causing Nick and Warrick to back off.

She stood on wobbly legs but insisted on visiting with Father Andrew.

"Do they know?" asked Sara suddenly.

"I only told them that Grissom was being treated for a minor accident," explained Brass.

Sara nodded.

She took a deep breath before going into the room.

She smiled when she saw them holding hands.

"Are you okay?" asked Father Andrew.

"I've been better," she admitted.

"You look tired," said Mrs. Grissom.

"I am. I just wanted to check on both of you before I get some rest."

"Go home," urged Father Andrew.

"You okay?" she asked.

He winked at her.

She smiled as she leaned over and kissed him on the forehead before leaving.

Brass was waiting outside.

"Powell was found at the church. He confessed to the murders," said Brass.

Sara nodded as she leaned against the wall.

"Sara, you're exhausted," Brass fumed.

"How's Grissom?"

"Being obnoxious to the nurses," he replied.

"He's fine?" she asked.

"He's fine."

Sara stared at Brass.

"Sara? You don't look well," Brass said as he stepped forward.

"I'm not feeling…"

She crumbled into his arms as he called for assistance.

Note from author:

I love reading the reviews. Please continue to leave them.

Take care,

Penny


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

It was the prick of the needle that brought her back to consciousness.

She fought with the oxygen mask but a hand clamped firmly down on it as she looked up into dark eyes.

"Try to move it and you'll have to answer to me," warned Brass.

She winced when she felt the needle move under her skin.

"Sorry kiddo. You're dehydrated," explained Brass. "Looks like you get to spend the night in the hospital."

She violently shook her head.

"You'll have a roommate," he smiled.

She looked at Brass.

"I asked them to put you with Grissom. I thought you would be less trouble. Don't make me regret it."

She shook her head as she closed her eyes.

When she woke next, she found herself in a room.

She glanced over and saw Grissom watching her.

"How long have I been here?" she asked.

"A couple of hours," Grissom replied.

"How are you?" she asked.

"I should be asking you that. I heard you passed out," he said sounding angry.

"At least I was still breathing," she shot back.

She attempted to get out of bed but became entangled with the IV drip.

She muttered when the needle caused her to reevaluate her plan.

"You're going to need that for awhile," he warned.

"I hate needles," she whined.

"What were you trying to do?" he asked.

"Come over to your bed," she muttered.

"Mind if I come over there?" he asked.

He slipped into the other side and pulled her against him.

"Don't try to roll over and I think we'll be safe," he cautioned.

She smiled.

"Go back to sleep," he ordered.

She snuggled up close to him and he chuckled when she was asleep before he could even plant a kiss on her forehead.

Brass peeked into the room and chuckled.

He slipped into a chair and stood guard.

She woke with a start when she felt the IV being removed from her arm.

"Sorry I woke you," said the nurse. "You don't need this anymore."

"Good, cause I so have to go to the bathroom," replied Sara.

The nurse laughed as Sara scurried from the bed and into the bathroom.

She returned and stopped dead in her tracks.

"Where's Grissom?" she asked suddenly.

"Mr. Grissom is visiting someone else in the hospital," replied the nurse.

Sara glanced down at the hospital gown and grabbed the back of it.

"I can leave, right?" asked Sara.

"As soon as the doctor has seen you," replied the nurse.

"What for? I was dehydrated and now I'm better," replied Sara.

"He has a few things he wants to discuss with you," eyed the nurse.

"Few things?" asked Sara.

"I'll get you a robe," offered the nurse.

"I'll just dress in my clothes," replied Sara.

She looked around the room but could not seem to find them.

"I can't find my clothes," whined Sara.

"I think Mr. Grissom took them," smirked the nurse.

"He took my clothes? Why?" she asked sounding miffed.

"Something about your failure to follow instructions."

"I do…just not his…all the time."

"The doctor will be here soon," she said handing her the robe.

Sara wrapped it around her as she made her way to Father Andrew's room.

She breathed in deeply before stepping inside.

"She's awake," announced Father Andrew.

Sara glanced in the direction of Grissom.

She seemed annoyed that he was already dressed.

"Hey, how are you?" she asked as she made her way to the side of the bed.

"I want to leave but they tell me I can't leave for several more days," Father Andrew complained.

"You need rest," she ordered.

Grissom coughed.

Sara's head jerked in his direction.

"It's just a cough," Grissom said softly.

"Right," she replied as she stared at him.

Mrs. Grissom noticed the look of concern.

"Gilbert, is everything alright?" she asked.

"Everything is fine…at least with me," he said with arms folded.

Sara looked puzzled.

There was a tap on the door and a doctor appeared.

"I was told my patient is in here," stated Doctor Albert.

"Pick one," smiled Grissom.

"I'm looking for Sara Sidle," he replied.

Hands pointed at Sara.

"Stool pigeons," she muttered.

Father Andrew chuckled but then grimaced.

"Are you alright?" Sara asked quickly.

"I'm fine, Sara. Just forgot that it hurts to laugh," smiled Father Andrew.

"Would you like to go back to your room or do you mind if I examine you here?" asked Dr. Albert.

"There's really no need. I'm feeling great," she said as she stepped back when Dr. Albert advanced near her.

"I can't release you until I've examined you."

"Sara, let him examine you and then we can leave," urged Grissom.

"I don't need to be examined," she insisted with her arms folded.

"She's stubborn," said Grissom. "You can examine her here."

"He cannot!"

"If he does not examine you then you can't return to work," threatened Grissom.

Sara's head jerked around to glare at Grissom.

"Look, I was just tired. You on the other hand…you…" she stopped when she realized Mrs. Grissom was listening intently.

"Gilbert, what happened to you?" asked Emily.

Grissom glared back at Sara.

Sara's eyes dropped to the floor in regret.

"There was some gas leakage…I inhaled a little too much. I'm fine now," he replied.

"Your physician released you?" she asked.

"Yes, mother. I'm fine," Grissom assured her. "Sara, on the other hand…"

"Look, there is nothing wrong with me!"

"Ms. Sidle. There are a few things I would like to discuss with you," said Dr. Albert.

Sara stepped back further and felt a hand on her back.

It was Andrew's.

"Sara, be a good girl and let the doctor do his job," encouraged Father Andrew.

"But…"

"No examine, no working," warned Grissom.

Grissom grinned.

She wanted to slap him.

"Ms. Sidle?" asked Dr. Albert.

"My room," she replied quietly.

Within a few minutes she was sitting on her bed as she suffered through the examination.

"See, I'm fine," she said shooting a glare at Grissom who insisted on returning to their room.

"Ms. Sidle, I'm concerned about your weight," began Dr. Albert.

She blinked.

"You're kidding, right?"

"No, I'm not."

"I eat," she protested. "When my job allows."

Grissom explained their odd schedule.

"How often are your menstrual cycles?"

Sara blushed.

Grissom edged toward the bed.

Sara was surprised by his bold move.

She thought the conversation would send him running out of the room but instead he was moving closer.

"They're uhm usually timely," she replied softly.

"How've they been in the last six months?" he asked.

"Unpredictable," she replied. "Look, the last few months have been unusual."

"How stressful is your job?" he asked.

Sara did not reply.

Dr. Albert glanced at Grissom.

"Ms. Sidle, stress and low weight can impede your ability to get pregnant," he warned.

"Well, I'm single and not married and not…."

She stopped herself.

She never let herself dream about a family.

"You're also anemic," Dr. Albert added. "Been feeling tired a lot?"

"Some," she admitted.

"You should consider making some changes in your dietary habits. I'll write a prescription for the anemia. I want you to be checked in three months by your own physician."

Sara nodded.

"I'll let the nurse know that you can be released," Dr. Albert said with a smile.

"Thank you," Sara murmured.

He scribbled a few notes and disappeared.

"Sara?"

When she did not respond, Grissom stood in front of her.

"You uhm didn't finish what you were saying," he said softly.

"Finish?"

"You said you were single and not married and not…what were you going to say?"

"Nothing," she lied.

"Did you ever consider children?" he asked.

"No."

"Do you want children?" he asked.

"Do you?"

"I asked you first?"

"I should dress," she replied.

Grissom watched as she disappeared into the bathroom.

He was sitting there on the bed when she returned.

"No discharge papers?" she asked.

"Not yet," he responded.

She groaned.

She sat down on the other bed and they stared at one another.

"Does the stress bother you?" he asked.

"No," she lied.

"Has counseling helped?" he asked.

"No."

He frowned.

"This…this has helped," she whispered.

"What?"

"Us…talking…not fighting," she replied.

"We never fought," he declared.

"Verbal fights are worse than physical ones."

"Sara…"

"What's keeping them?" she asked sounding frustrated.

"Going to answer my question?" he challenged.

"What question?"

"Do you want children?"

"I want…you," she whispered.

"Are you afraid to answer?" he asked.

"I uhm guess I am," she admitted.

He nodded slowly.

The nurse appeared and they were both grateful for the interruption. Sara took one glance at the wheelchair and huffed. "I'm not getting in that."

"Sara…" began Grissom.

When another wheelchair appeared, Sara turned and grinned at him.

He grabbed her hand and they walked out despite the protests of the nurses.

"I want to say goodbye to Father Andrew," said Sara as they stepped out of the elevator.

They ran into Mrs. Grissom in the hallway.

"He sent me to the hotel to rest. He can be downright…"

"Stubborn," finished Sara.

Mrs. Grissom smiled.

"I'll walk her over," said Grissom as Sara headed down the hall.

Once inside the room, Sara sat beside the bed.

Father Andrew waited until she was seated.

"I'm worried about you," he admitted suddenly.

"I'm fine, really."

"Is there something bothering you?" asked Father Andrew.

Sara shook her head but then looked at Father Andrew.

"The doctor mentioned problems with my weight…the stress…nothing you and I haven't already discussed."

"All the more reason for you to take care of yourself," he urged.

"Did you uhm ever want children?" she asked.

"I accepted I would never have a family the moment I decided to become a priest," answered Father Andrew.

"Father Powell accused you of…breaking your vows…it's the reason he…uhm murdered those boys and…"

Sara did not finish.

"He tried to hurt Gil, didn't he?" asked Andrew.

Sara nodded.

"If anything had happened to Gil, I never would have…"

"You saw him for yourself. He's fine," assured Sara.

"And yet one cough and you're worried," said Father Andrew.

Sara said nothing.

"One pleasurable but painful laugh and you're afraid I've hurt myself," added Father Andrew.

"Over reaction," she admitted.

"You're afraid of losing one of us," he said.

She nodded slowly.

"Stop worrying. As you said, Gil is fine. I'll be out of here soon," he grimaced as he tried to sit up further.

She did know why but she lifted his hand to her cheek. His hand was warm and gentle.

_He's so much like Grissom…_

_They each don't even know it…_

_Or do they?_

"What do you want to ask me, Sara?"

She did not know how to ask.

"I've never broken my vows," he said. "God knows I've been tempted. After Gerald died, I wanted to make a life with Emily and Gil. She wouldn't let me. Twenty years ago when she showed up on my doorstep, I wanted nothing more than to…I couldn't. I couldn't risk my work. I think she would have let me but I chose my work instead. It's sad to look back on your life and wonder how things might have been if I had only stayed with Emily."

He took a ragged breath.

"Sara, I never broke my vows," he repeated.

_It happened before he took his vows…_

_He really doesn't know…_

_He doesn't know Grissom is his son…_

"I believe you," she whispered.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "I'm worried about you."

"Did you know that Grissom wanted to enter the priesthood?" she asked.

He stared at her.

"Yes, I do," he said softly. "Are you afraid he's still considering it?"

"He never got to choose. His mother chose for him," whispered Sara.

"Gil would not have let his mother impede what he really wanted to do," countered Father Andrew.

"His anger towards you…would have," said Sara.

Father Andrew did not reply.

"He's spent most of his life alone…never letting anyone get close," said Sara.

"I think I'm to blame for that. He felt betrayed. He allowed himself to love me like his own father and I turned away."

"There was a reason. Emily didn't want you to sacrifice your life's work for…"

"Would it have been such a sacrifice?" he asked wearily. "Sometimes, I look back and wonder what I've accomplished. How many persons have I helped? Those boys…"

"You do so much more than…we do," she cried.

It unsettled them both.

"Don't put me on a pedestal Sara," he warned. "I am human and I have flaws."

"I'm not….but I also know that you saw me. You saw me when no one else did. You reached out when I didn't much care what happened to me and frankly I've never been more scared in my life. You're the closest thing I've had to a father besides Brass."

Father Andrew sniffled. "Brass is a good man. I'm honored Sara. I don't know why you seem to touch a part of my heart where no one else has. I look at you and I see a young Emily. Don't start hiding your feelings, Sara. It's better to be hurt than to hide them away. Fifty years has taught me that."

"I'm scared. What if he decides he doesn't want me?"

"He loves you Sara."

"Emily loves you. You love Emily and yet you're not together. Maybe Grissom and I were never meant to be together."

"I see the way he looks at you, Sara. He can't hide his feelings all of the time."

"We can't be together. He's my boss."

"Then quit. Change jobs. Change shifts. Do something."

"Just like that?"

"What do you want Sara?"

"I want Grissom to be happy."

"I want you to be happy. What do you want?"

"I uhm want Grissom."

"You want children," he chided.

"I'm not sure…Grissom may not want…"

"So you're willing to do whatever Gil wants. Do you think that will really make you happy?"

"I'll do whatever it takes to make Grissom happy if he'll give me a chance."

"I think you need to talk with him," he urged as he leaned forward and caressed her cheek.

Her head rested gently on his chest.

Grissom quietly appeared in the doorway.

Sara's head jerked up when she felt his presence.

Grissom walked over and stood beside the bed. "Mom will be back soon. She needs to rest."

"Thank you for making sure she went," said Father Andrew. "Now, you need to take Sara home."

"I intend to do just that," he agreed as he squeezed the old man's hand before heading to the door with Sara.

"Gil, could I see you for a moment?" asked Father Andrew.

"I'll be outside," Sara said as she disappeared from the room.

"She's fast," commented Father Andrew. "Disappearing like that."

"I think she's perfected it over the years when we crossed paths," replied Grissom.

"It was good to hear Latin come from your lips," said Father Andrew. "It always came with such ease."

"Once a Catholic, always a…"

"Are you happy with your job?" asked Andrew.

"I'm happy…in the choices I've made…the choices I'm going to make."

Sara felt a slight chill standing out in the hallway. She realized she had left her jacket in the room and stepped toward the door intending to knock. She stopped when she overheard Grissom.

"My job has been my life. I've worked very hard getting where I am."

"You don't want to lose that," said Father Andrew.

"No, I don't."

"You're afraid your relationship with Sara is going to jeopardize that," surmised Father Andrew.

"I'm afraid it's too late for that," replied Grissom.

Sara quickly hurried down the hall. She breathed in deeply as she leaned against the wall.

_He could lose his job because of me…_

_He could lose everything he's worked for…_

_I can't let that happen…_

"Take care of yourself," Andrew whispered as Grissom left.

Note from author:

I can't say how much I have enjoyed reading the reviews. Some of them make me chuckle and I need a good laugh these days…. Please continue to post a review for each chapter. Thanks to those who are so faithful and do this. I plan to wrap this up this week. Given the approaching holidays, I think I will post my Christmas story next week. We need something cheery…yeah, it is cheery…little or no angst…you're going to choke on fluff…lots of fluff balls…

Take care,

Penny


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter twenty:**

Grissom found her leaning against the wall.

"You left your jacket," he said handing it to her.

It seemed a bit awkward as they said little to one another on the drive to Sara's apartment.

Once they arrived, she grabbed her jacket and looked at him. "See you at work."

"You're going to take some time off," he insisted.

She blinked.

"Wait, I get exhausted and you force me to take off while you stop breathing and you…"

"I'll take off if you do," he offered.

She nodded slowly. "Griss…"

"We need to talk," he interrupted.

She licked her lips. "Sounds like we've come full circle. It wasn't that long ago when you brought me home after the DUI and said those same words."

"Sara, personnel will not allow us to have a personal relationship," he stated quickly.

She nodded.

"Do you want a relationship?" she asked.

"Do you?" he asked.

It was not the answer she sought.

"You don't have to do this," she said. "We can be friends."

Her statement made his gut wrench.

"Is that what you want?" he asked.

"Is it what you want?" she asked.

He opened his mouth but nothing came out.

She opened the car door and slipped out of the seat. "Thanks for bringing me home. Get some rest."

He watched as she hurried inside.

Their conversation had taken him completely offguard.

Gone was the persuasive Sara that had told him she knew what to do "about this."

_Friendship…_

He didn't want friendship.

It was something he had accepted when he told himself he could not have her.

He wanted her.

He wanted to do something "about this."

He wasn't sure whether Sara felt the same.

He started the engine and found himself driving aimlessly about.

He glanced down in the seat and found the crumpled up release papers.

_She left her prescription…_

He filled it and then returned.

He didn't even bother to call but began pounding on her door.

She opened the door and he quickly stepped in shutting the door.

"You uhm forgot your prescription," he said handing it to her.

"You could have just given that to me at work," she replied.

"You need it now," he said sounding frustrated. "You're anemic."

"Thank you," she murmured. "But you really didn't need to do that. You're tired. You should…go home."

He didn't want to leave.

He took a deep breath and she waited for him to say something.

It took several minutes.

"I don't want to be just friends…even if you do."

She grimaced from the honesty of his words.

"I don't think I could just be a friend," she admitted.

"I want a relationship," he blurted out, "…if you do."

She swallowed. "You can't base your happiness on what I want. Tell me the truth."

He took a step forward.

"I want a relationship…more than anything else," he admitted.

"Me too," she agreed.

He breathed in deeply taking one final step until they were mere inches from one another.

"I want a family," he added.

She gulped.

He waited for her to reply but she was silent.

"You uhm don't want children?" he asked.

"I'm not sure I can," she whispered. "What happens if…"

"Sara, if it happens, it happens. I wouldn't care …." He fumbled for the right words.

"I want you," he said. "I don't care about anything else."

She slipped into his arms and he held her tight.

"Thank you…for knowing what to do about 'this'," he teased.

"Sometimes you just have to have faith," she smiled.

His lips devoured hers.

They were both gasping within minutes.

"Griss…about work," she said.

"I'll resign," he offered.

He was startled when she stepped away from him.

"No!"

"Sara, personnel will not…"

She grabbed the envelope lying on the counter and shoved it at him.

"I quit!"

"No, you don't!"

"Yes, I do."

He threw it back at her. "I'm not accepting this."

"I'll give it to Ecklie," she announced. "He'll be more than happy to accept it."

"If you quit, I quit," he challenged.

"That's ridiculous," she said crossing her arms.

"I agree," he replied. "You're not quitting."

"Neither are you!"

They looked at one another before smirking.

"Want to flip for it?" he asked.

"No. I'm going to switch to swing," she announced.

"I won't get to work with you as much," he pouted.

"You're right but we could have dinner...if you want," she said.

He smiled.

"We could also wake up next to one another," she added.

"I like that even more," he whispered as he leaned in for a kiss. He felt her hand slip into his shirt and he gently eased away from her.

"We should take this slow," he said.

"But…"

"We've waited this long," he said.

She blinked.

"How long do we wait?" she asked stepping closer.

He stepped back. "A little longer."

"Like how long?" she asked advancing on him as he stepped back further.

"Just long enough for Father Andrew to be released from the hospital so he and my mother can attend our wedding," he replied.

It was Sara's turn to retreat.

"A wedding?" she gulped.

"Yes, a wedding," he said stepping toward her.

"A wedding?" she asked again.

"Sara? Are you alright?" he asked as his hand came up and brushed against her forehead.

"A wedding?" she repeated.

"Sit down," he said pulling her down on the couch.

He sat across from her.

"I want to wake up next to you. I want to know you ate breakfast and lunch and…Sara, you're turning green," he said.

She held up her hand. "Married?"

"You don't want to get married?" he asked.

"I uhm didn't say that," she stammered. "Married?"

"Married…wedding…you would marry me, wouldn't you?" he asked.

"Is that a proposal?" she asked.

"Yes…no…if it was, would you say yes?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Is that a yes?" he asked.

"Yes," she breathed.

He kissed her as he felt her pulling him down on the couch.

"Sara, we should stop," he cautioned.

"Wait. You're serious about this waiting…right?"

"Yes, I am."

She bit her lower lip. "How long?"

"At least you've moved past married," he chuckled.

She let a yawn slip out.

"Bed, my dear," he said as he pulled her up.

"But we're not finished talking," she argued.

"Bed!" he ordered.

He grabbed the prescription and waited until she took it before pulling her to the bedroom.

He sat down on the edge of the bed once she was settled.

"I'll see you in a few hours," he said as he leaned down and kissed her before standing.

Sara quickly grabbed his hand. "Don't go!"

He sat back down. "I think it would be best if I left."

"Why?"

"You know why," he said as his eyes roamed down her body.

"Please…don't go," she begged.

He kissed the palm of her hand.

"Just sleep…with me," she whispered. "Please."

She watched as he stripped off his pants and shirt.

His warm body encircled hers.

They lay there for several minutes before she spoke.

"Why uhm do you want to wait?" she asked. "You uhm slept with Heather…I slept with Hank."

"I never wanted to marry Heather…did you want…"

"No!"

His beard brushed against her cheek as he kissed her.

"Old fashioned, I guess. It's not a rejection, Sara. I want you," he whispered.

"It's frustrating," she admitted.

He chuckled. "Yes, it is which will make the honeymoon…"

She rose quickly. "Honeymoon?"

"A honeymoon usually follows a wedding," he clarified.

"Honeymoon?" she repeated.

"Marriage scares you, doesn't it?" he asked.

"I didn't say that," she quivered.

"I'm a trained CSI. You're scared," he announced.

"I am not," she pouted.

"Say it: wedding, marriage, honeymoon."

"It's just that…I have to switch shifts, Father Andrew needs to get out of the hospital, we haven't even talked about where, how or…I don't have a dress."

He pulled her over so they were facing one another.

"No stress," he cautioned.

"No stress," she breathed.

"Sara, your breathing is irregular….are you…don't hyperventilate!"

She woke later to find him fully dressed drinking coffee.

"Did I wake you?" he asked.

"Coffee smells good," she smiled.

"Juice for you," he said.

She took the glass.

"I called Ecklie," he began.

Her eyes darted over to him.

"He's agreed to move you to swing shift," he said. "You start…after the honeymoon."

She choked on the juice.

"I uhm talked with Father Andrew and Mother. They're both happy for us. Father Andrew insists he'll be out by the end of the week."

"That's too soon! What if he has a relapse? He gets winded just talking. He hasn't gotten out of bed…"

"He walked down the hall this morning. He's determined to get out…now that he knows I've asked him to marry us…kind of an incentive."

Sara smiled. "Thank you."

"I talked with Catherine."

She set the glass down. "How much sleep did you get?"

"Enough," he said as he continued. "I've asked her to help you…with the dress problem."

"You should have asked Greg…Catherine and I don't see eye to eye when it comes to clothing."

"Sara, she wants to help. She wishes us well…they all do."

"You told them?"

"Yes, I did. They were quite happy…relieved actually."

She chuckled.

"So, we can get married in the church by Father Andrew. Catherine will no doubt have a slew of dresses by the end of the week. The guys have offered to cover while we're uhm away."

"Away?"

"Honeymoon…just a few days…maybe next year we can plan our vacations so we can take off more."

"A few days is fine," she said suddenly.

"Jim owns a cabin not far from here...unless you want to go somewhere else," he added quickly.

"I don't care where we go…just make sure it has a bed…"

She stopped suddenly feeling very embarrassed.

"My thoughts also," he grinned.

He leaned over and kissed her.

"Does this help?" he asked.

"Yes…it does," she said pulling him closer. His hands pulled her body tight against his and he breathed in deeply. "I love your scent."

"Thank you…I think," she murmured in his neck.

His hands slid down her waist.

Her breathing became labored as she kissed his chest.

"Shower," he whispered.

"Griss…"

She dipped down and kissed his lips letting her tongue tease his. Her brown eyes stared at him intently. She suddenly found herself flat on her back as he rolled over on top of her. His hands were suddenly everywhere. She reveled in the feel of his hands on her body. She sucked in air when she felt his lips descend.

She slowly pulled away.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "You want to wait and I…I just want you."

He groaned. "Shower…now…"

"I'm sorry," she said again. "This is my fault. I led you…"

"I want the same thing," he said pushing her off the bed. "We can do this. We can wait."

"Right!" she announced. "I'm uhm going to go take that cold shower."

"Leave some cold water…for me," he groaned into the pillow.

"We uhm could…share," she offered.

"Sara!" he moaned as he threw a pillow in her direction.

"Painful?" she asked.

"Very."

"Good. Imagine how it was for me all these years," she smirked.

Note from author:

I couldn't resist that last jab…

Leave a review…

Take care,

Penny


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter twenty one:**

Sara smiled when she saw Mrs. Grissom sitting in the lobby.

"Gil is out in the field," said Sara.

"I came to see you," announced Emily Grissom.

"We can use his office," she offered. "Mine doesn't have walls."

Sara grabbed two cups of coffee and then guided her to Grissom's office. Sara shut the door and sat down in Grissom's seat.

"How is Father Andrew?" asked Sara.

"He wants to come home. He insists on getting up every other hour and walk."

"He's not overdoing it?" asked Sara.

"No, he's not," replied Mrs. Grissom.

"Good."

"I wanted to thank you…for being patient with my son. He's loved you for many years but couldn't bring himself to show you."

"I've loved him forever it seems," sighed Sara.

"It's that way with…Andrew. I loved him from the moment he moved next door to me," smiled Mrs. Grissom. "I always told myself I would marry him someday."

"He loves you…so very much," said Sara.

"He uhm didn't belong to me," said Emily sadly. "It broke my heart to let him go. I knew I could love Gerald if I let myself. He was such a good man…a bit older than me but I didn't care about age. It's not important if you love someone."

"No, it doesn't" admitted Sara.

"I knew the moment I watched Andrew give last rites to a young man, that he was meant to be a priest. I was selfish Sara. I wanted him…even if it meant I would never have him again. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"You slept with Andrew," whispered Sara.

"Yes, I did. I'd been waiting my whole life for that moment and when it happened, I realized we would never be together again. I knew he belonged to the church. I was so lost…Gerald encouraged me to attend this school for the deaf and I finally agreed. He was very supportive. I knew he loved me but I didn't feel worthy. I broke down and admitted what I had done. He didn't care. He proposed and then the next minute I'm writing the letter to Andrew. I felt it would be better if I was married…he would accept it and…"

She stopped swiping at her eyes.

"You wanted him to take his vows…since you did," said Sara.

"Yes. I never regretted marrying Gerald. He was a good man. He was kind and gentle. I became pregnant immediately and he was so happy. We both were. I settled into my life just as Andrew did his. I settled on friendship even though I still loved him. He did the same. I think Gerald knew this but he never once indicated he was ever jealous of our relationship. He just accepted it."

"It sounds like Gerald was quite a man," said Sara.

"Just like Gil. I couldn't give him my complete love but at least I gave him a son."

Sara's stomach knotted.

_She didn't know…_

_No one knows except me…_

Sara nodded.

"I want to thank you for helping my son and Andrew resolve their problems."

"I love them both very much," replied Sara.

"I know….that's why I'm happy that you'll soon become my son's wife. He's waited all these years for you, Sara."

Sara breathed in deeply as if she were struggling with her emotions.

"I'm glad," she managed to get out.

"Andrew is leaving the church," said Mrs. Grissom.

"He loves you," smiled Sara.

"I'm not sure how Gil…" Mrs. Grissom sniffled.

"Griss…Gil wants you to be happy," said Sara.

The door opened and Grissom stepped inside.

He glanced at Sara as he leaned over and kissed his mother.

"I just came to congratulate Sara," said Mrs. Grissom.

"None for me?" he teased.

"She's putting up with you," replied Mrs. Grissom. "She should apply for sainthood."

He frowned.

Mrs. Grissom stood. "I should get back to the hospital."

"Mother, I want you…and Father Andrew to stay with me once he's released," offered Grissom.

Mrs. Grissom smiled as she left.

Sara stood quickly. "I should get back to work."

Grissom grabbed her hand.

"Is that the only thing you talked about?" asked Grissom.

"Yes," lied Sara.

She hated lies.

She sighed. "Your mother and I were talking about…your past. I'm sorry. She confided in me and…"

"Sara, I don't mind…we have no secrets…my private life is yours now," he said. "I hope you feel the same way."

_No secrets…_

She gulped.

"Are you alright?" he asked coming around the desk.

"Have you made peace with Father Andrew?" she asked.

"Yes, I have," he said nuzzling her neck.

"He's like... a father... to me," she admitted.

"I'm glad. He wanted to be a father to me…I know that now… but he could never replace my father. I loved my father very much. He was the most important person in my life. I still miss him but I can accept Father Andrew with…my mom."

_Do I tell him?_

"Sara?"

"Hmmm?"

"Marry me," he pleaded.

Her body stiffened. "You've already asked."

He stepped back so he could look at her.

"Marry me…please."

"Is this a test…to see if I turn green or hyperventilate again? I'm not," she said stubbornly.

"That's not an answer," he scolded.

She nodded.

"Is that a yes?" he asked.

"Yes," she whispered.

He pulled out a small black box from his pocket. "I picked it up today."

He watched as she opened the box and stared at the ring.

"Do you like it?" he asked anxiously.

"It's beautiful," she sniffled.

He slipped the ring on her finger. "You make me happy."

She burst into tears as she hugged him tight.

"Sara…Sara, what's wrong?" he asked.

"I love you so much," she cried as she quickly pulled away and disappeared.

Grissom stood there baffled.

She hid from him the rest of the shift.

He wasn't sure what he had done but he felt a bit apprehensive once shift ended and she was nowhere to be seen.

He told himself not to worry when he found she had already left for the day.

She wasn't sure why she sought him out but she felt she had nowhere else to turn.

Brass glanced up and smiled at her. "Hey kiddo."

She slipped down into the office chair. "Could we talk?"

"This is different," Brass said. "You stopped talking to me when you became friends with Father Andrew."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean…you're Grissom's friend and I…" she stood quickly. "I'm sorry."

"Whoa! I didn't say no," Brass responded quickly as he stood grabbing his jacket. "How about dinner? We haven't done that in awhile."

She nodded trying to hide her sniffles.

_Great…_

_They're engaged for less than twenty four hours and he's already screwed up…_

Once they were settled into the diner, he picked up her hand and admired the ring.

"It's very nice," admitted Brass.

"He uhm proposed again in his office…he gave it to me then," she explained.

"You don't seem happy," he pointed out.

"I am…very. It's just that…He's being so sweet and I Uhm…I mean he's letting me in for the first time…confiding in me…he said his private life was mine also," she gulped.

"Sara, marriage means sharing everything…even the bad. What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she sputtered.

The food arrived and she stared at it.

"Not hungry?" he asked as he took a bite.

"Share everything?" she whispered.

"If you want a healthy marriage…yes," he replied.

He eyed her closely.

"What is it?"

"What if I know something…that he doesn't," she groaned.

"Spill it," ordered Brass.

"No."

"Sara, let me help," he offered.

"No."

"This is obviously bothering you," he urged.

"No."

"Secrets always come out," he warned. "Better to confess now than…"

"No one knows…but me," she said.

"The truth always comes out…sooner or later. How do you think he's going to feel when he finds out and you didn't tell him?"

Her head hurt.

"I'm not sure how he's going to react to the news…given his age…what's happened," she let her head drop to her hands.

"Listen, eat," he said. "We'll talk later."

"I'm not hungry," she said pushing the plate away.

"Yes, you are," said Grissom sliding in beside her.

She seemed startled at first.

"You left…without saying goodbye," he said accusingly.

"I went to see Brass," she said. "I needed to ask him something."

"You did?" asked Brass.

She glared at him.

"She did," replied Brass as he shoved a bite of food in his mouth to avoid saying anything else.

Grissom glanced at the two.

"What did you have to ask him?" inquired Grissom.

"I uhm need… someone to give me away…I wanted to ask Brass," replied Sara.

Brass suddenly stopped eating. "You want me?"

"If you don't…"

"Of course I do!" he said happily.

Grissom smiled at her. "I'd forgotten about that small detail."

"No need. It's now taken care of," she said.

"You've not eaten," he said looking at the plate. "Taken your medicine?"

"Yes," she sighed.

She pulled the plate back and shared with Grissom.

"So when is this grand event?" asked Brass.

"We're not sure. We're waiting for Father Andrew to recover from surgery," said Grissom.

"So it's Father Andrew now?" teased Brass.

Grissom frowned when she pushed the plate toward him as she sat back.

"Sara…your weight," he began.

"That's a dangerous discussion to be having with your bride to be," chuckled Brass.

"Doctor's orders," replied Grissom as he scowled at Brass.

"Food doesn't set well with me right now," she murmurred.

"You've been overly tired," said Grissom as he accepted the cup of coffee from the waitress.

Brass stared at the two.

_She's pregnant!_

_She doesn't know how to tell him…_

"I get it! Sorry…it's just you said…I mean…I think I need to leave," Brass muttered as he grabbed the check and then left.

Grissom glanced at her.

"Going to tell me what that was about?" asked Grissom.

"Not a clue," lied Sara.

"Going to tell me what's bothering you?" he asked.

"I just took care of it," she said nibbling on a piece of food.

"I'm uhm worried," he sighed. "I'm afraid you're having second thoughts."

"I'm not!"

He seemed insecure despite her reply.

She curled her arm around his and kissed him thoroughly causing the other patrons to stare and snicker.

"Believe me now?" she asked.

He nodded as he tried to catch his breath.

The next day she started to place a file into Grissom's inbox but Brass grabbed her.

"We need to talk," he said pulling her over to a secluded area.

"I know," he whispered.

"You do?" she asked.

"it wasn't hard to figure it out," he replied. "It's a matter of time before Grissom finds out. You know he will."

She nodded.

"You have to tell him," Brass declared.

"I can't," she answered.

"He deserves to know…now before it's too late," he warned.

"But…"

"You can't hide something like this," Brass whispered. "You can't keep this to yourself."

"It would only complicate things," she said looking about to ensure no one was around.

"Sara, it may be a complication but Grissom…needs to know. Have you talked with Father Andrew?" asked Brass.

"I don't know how he's going to react," she sighed. "God, why did I have to find out?"

"When did you find out…when you were in the hospital?" asked Brass.

She shook her head.

"Before…I didn't know what to do once I found out. I mean I was worried about Grissom and Father Andrew and then…I…"

"You scared the hell out of me when you passed out. Stress is not good! Your doctor should have warned you about it," he scolded.

"He did," she admitted.

"So are you going to tell him?" ask Brass.

"Look, maybe it's best no one knows. He's gone this long without knowing?"

"You have no right to keep this from Grissom."

"I'm not convinced…that he should know…maybe after…when Emily and Father Andrew are settled…I just think it's best if I wait," she pleaded.

"He's worried about you," said Brass. "He suspects you're keeping something from him."

"I know," she moaned. "I hate secrets."

"Then tell him!" Brass urged.

"You make it sound so simple," she breathed as she tossed the file from hand to hand as a means of distraction.

"Want me to tell him?" he asked.

She stared at Brass.

"I can tell him," he offered again.

She stood there trying to figure out what to do.

"I'll tell him," said Brass.

She said nothing as she struggled with her emotions.

"I'm going to tell Grissom," said Brass.

She nodded her head slowly.

"Tell me what?" Grissom asked as he stood behind them.

Sara dropped the case file into the floor.

"Is that for me?" Grissom asked.

"For you?" she asked.

"Yes, it is," said Brass as he retrieved the file.

"So, what do you need to tell me?" asked Grissom.

Sara fled.

"What's wrong with her?" asked Grissom.

"We need to talk," said Brass.

He waited until Grissom was seated before locking the door and taking a seat.

"Why the mystery?" asked Grissom.

"Gil, something has been bothering Sara," said Brass.

"I know. She won't tell me," he admitted.

"She's afraid how you'll react," replied Brass. "I'm counting on you to do the right thing. Understand?"

"No but I'm sure you're going to tell me," frowned Grissom.

"Sara…is…pregnant," said Brass.

Note from author:

Can you see the confusion building… It's like that old skit: who's on first, what's on second, I don't know it on third…mass confusion…from crime scene investigators…

Take care,

Penny


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty two:**

Grissom gawked.

"She admitted it…this morning…I mean I figured it out during dinner."

"But…"

Grissom looked confused.

"Gil, she's afraid this is going to change everything. I assured her it won't."

"It does!" Grissom yelled.

"She's scared Grissom. She's afraid that you're not going to want this baby. You do, don't you?"

"No!"

Brass stood immediately and leaned across the desk. "What the hell do you mean no?"

"It's not mine!"

"Of course it is!"

"It's not mine!" seethed Grissom.

"Look, unless you want me to drag you back to the hospital and have your brain examined; you better explain why you think it isn't yours."

"We've never had sex!"

Brass slumped back into his seat. "Oh."

Grissom did the same as he tried to calm his breathing.

"There has to be…a reason…Sara loves you…she would never…" Brass continued to mutter under his breath.

Brass glanced at Grissom.

"What are you going to do?" asked Brass.

"I uhm not sure," admitted Grissom.

"You should calm down before you talk with her. Stress is not good for the baby," he warned.

"She was afraid she couldn't get pregnant," Grissom grumbled. "Wonder who…"

"Don't go there! Sara waited years for you to get your act together. To be frank with you, I never understood why she didn't just go out and find someone else after that Hank fellow."

"Apparently she did!"

"Look, maybe it was a one night stand…I can't believe I'm saying this much less believe it. Maybe she let things get out of hand…maybe things got out of hand…guy took advantage of her."

Their eyes locked.

"Hell, you need to talk with her," muttered Brass. "We both know she's been depressed...alot."

"You think she's talked with Father Andrew?" asked Grissom.

"She came to me…she said she couldn't talk to anyone else," said Brass.

Grissom nodded.

"Whatever you do, don't yell at her!" Brass threatened.

Brass left as Grissom sat there and threw the file at the closed door.

"Sara…"

She jumped at the sound of Nick's voice causing her locker to clang against her knee.

"You're as jumpy as a cat on a hot tinned roof," Nick stated. "Is there something wrong?"

"No," she said.

He stared at her hand.

"I see the bugman got you a ring," he said with a grin. "I guess it's official."

"Yes," she whispered.

"You scared?" he asked.

"I uhm scared to death," she admitted. "I keep expecting something to go wrong. I mean happy endings are for Hollywood movies…not my life."

"That's not true," chided Nick. "Just look at your life. You're a great criminalist. You're engaged to a brilliant man who loves you. He does you know."

"I keep waiting for him to…"

"Run?" finished Nick.

"He's not…yet. He's planning …helping me…" she gulped.

"Sara, happy endings do happen," he said pulling her into his arms.

"I'm just afraid he's going to…I'm scared Nicky. I've never loved anyone as much as…" she sobbed into his shoulder as he stood there and comforted her.

Grissom quietly stood in the shadows.

"Sara, Grissom loves you. He's always loved you…just like you love him. He's not going to ask you to marry him and then change his mind."

She sniffled. "Happy endings never happened in my family."

"They do now," Nick soothed. "You've just got to believe."

Sara swiped at her eyes. "I'm sorry Nicky. I've wrinkled your shirt and gotten it wet."

"You can use my shoulder anytime," he offered. "Feel better?"

"I'm tired," she sighed. "I just want to go home and sleep."

"See you tomorrow," Nick said as he grabbed his jacket and left.

Grissom listened as Sara blew her nose and then shut her locker. Her footsteps echoed out the door.

_She loves me…_

_She knows me too well…_

He was surprised when his phone rang and saw that it was Sara.

He didn't answer it as he grabbed his things from his locker and left himself.

He stepped into the hospital room and sat down even though Father Andrew was sleeping. His mother was nowhere to be seen but he surmised she was at the hotel.

"It's good to see you," said Father Andrew.

Grissom smiled briefly. "I hope I didn't wake you."

"Of course not," Andrew replied.

Grissom shuffled in his seat.

"What's wrong?" asked Father Andrew.

"I'm uhm…Sara…" he didn't finish but sat there staring at the floor.

"Did something happen to Sara?" asked Father Andrew worriedly.

"She's fine," said Grissom.

"Good," exhaled Father Andrew. "I was afraid…Gil, has something happened between you and Sara?"

"It could," he admitted.

"If I'm going to marry you then you should confide…"

"I uhm need your advice," Grissom said softly.

"I'll help…in any way I can," offered Father Andrew.

Grissom didn't know how to begin.

"You uhm loved my mother…before she married my father…is that right?"

"Yes I did. I've always loved your mother. Gil, Sara loves you very much."

"How did you feel…when she married my father…had me?" asked Grissom.

"I was happy for her," replied Father Andrew.

"You weren't angry? Felt betrayed?"

Father Andrew grimaced as he tried to sit up.

Grissom assisted.

"I'll admit when she sent me the letter and told me she was marrying Gerald…it hurt. Gil, your mother wanted me to follow through with my plans to become a priest. I didn't hate her or feel betrayed. I couldn't have it both ways. I wanted her to be happy. She deserved to have a family…a life. Gerald was very good for her. He loved her very much. He loved you."

"When my father died, you wanted to marry my mother…you were willing to…I wasn't your son…"

"You've always been my son, Gil. In my heart, you were mine," swallowed Father Andrew.

The old man swiped at his eyes.

"I'm sorry for the way I treated you. I'm not sure how I would have gotten through my father's death if you weren't there. You meant…you mean a lot to me," admitted Grissom.

"What does this have to do with Sara?" asked Father Andrew.

"Nothing," Grissom said. "I guess I just need to work through some things…put it behind me."

"Gil, there's something you need to know…about Sara," began Father Andrew.

_He knows?_

"She's very insecure. She's self destructive…without even knowing it. She forgets to eat, sleep, rest… she won't admit when things hurt her… she hides behind her work to avoid the pain from her childhood…from you. She doesn't expect anything because she's used to nothing. She's made choices that she regrets. She carries her guilt…I can't seem to convince her to let it go. She chose someone…else because she couldn't have the person she loved."

Father Andrew stared at Grissom.

"Me."

"Yes."

"I've hurt her a great deal," whispered Grissom.

"You can make up for that now. You can leave it in the past. Focus on now. Do you understand?"

Grissom nodded. "I've done things I'm not proud of myself."

"Sara needs reassurance."

Grissom nodded once more.

"Gil, I want you to know that I'm retiring…leaving the priesthood."

"I'm not surprised," replied Grissom.

"I am. I didn't think I'd get another chance…to be with your mother. I want you to know I love her very much," Father Andrew said.

"I know Father," said Grissom. "I am happy for both of you."

"Your wedding is the last assignment I want to fulfill," he said.

"Thank you," replied Grissom.

There was a silence.

"I've been meaning to talk with mom…to let her know that I wish you both the best. I mean that. I would like for you to stay at my house until you're feeling better."

"That would be nice, Gil," smiled Andrew.

Andrew wiped at his eyes.

"Gil, should I be worried about Sara?" asked Father Andrew.

"No, father."

Grissom wiped at his own eyes.

"I do love you father."

"I love you too, son."

There was a tap at her door, but she wanted to ignore it.

Sara rolled over on the couch.

The tap became persistent.

She rolled over onto the floor when her phone began to ring.

"Sidle," she mumbled.

"Sara?"

"Griss?"

"Now that we have that established, could you open the door?" he asked.

He listened as she fumbled with the locks.

The door swung open and they came face to face.

"Hey," she whispered.

"I'm sorry I woke you," he said reaching out to brush the hair from her face.

"I tried calling you earlier," she said as she stepped aside and let him in.

"I uhm talked with Brass."

"Oh," she said nervously as she headed to the kitchen.

He followed.

"Drink?" she asked. "I mean I only have juice, water or coffee…nothing stronger…I'm sorry Grissom, I should have told you. I let Brass because I…"

He pulled her into his arms. "It doesn't matter."

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to be the one to hurt you," she sniffled.

"Don't," he whispered.

She gently pulled away as she made coffee.

"I've been worried about you," she whispered.

"Me?"

"Yes."

"I didn't know what to think when I couldn't reach you and you didn't respond to my messages."

"I went to talk with Father Andrew."

She almost dropped the coffee cup she took from the shelf.

He grabbed it quickly.

"How uhm did that go?" she asked.

"I uhm asked him how he felt when my mother married someone else…had me. You know what he said?"

She shook her head.

"He said he always considered me his own son. I did some pretty mean things to him and yet he still loves me…still considers me as his son. Blood doesn't matter, Sara. Do you understand?"

She nodded as she sniffled.

"Father Andrew said he's leaving the priesthood…after he marries us. He wants it to be his last assignment. I think he's going to marry my mother…at least I finally hope he does. She's waited a long time….to be with the one person she truly loves…like me. I've waited a long time to be with you. I can't imagine being with anyone but you."

"Are you sure?" she asked.

He pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you so much."

"I've not exactly been guiltless. I've done things..." she gulped between sobs.

"What ever happened in the past…we leave it in the past. I think it's good advice from Father Andrew. Don't you?"

_He doesn't want anyone else to know Father Andrew is his father…_

"Yes, I do," she said.

"Gil, you haven't really said how you feel. Do you want to talk about it?"

He did.

He had a thousand questions.

He wanted to know how, when, where, who but most of all he wanted to know if the guy meant anything to her.

He shook his head.

"After the wedding…let's just put it off until then," he pleaded. "Then we'll talk…really talk."

"Are you sure? I mean I don't mind…"

He minded.

He was afraid he would lose what little constraint he had on his emotions. He was trying very hard. He wanted a child with Sara.

_We'll raise it as our own…_

_No one else has to know…_

_Andrew was willing to accept me as his own…_

_I can accept this…_

_It's part of Sara…_

"Not now," he managed to get out.

"Gil, are you alright?" she asked as she faced him.

"I'll admit it hurt…but you could have told me," he whispered. "I would have understood."

_Right!_

_Like the way you went off on Brass…_

_She was smart to let Brass tell me…_

"I'm sorry," she stammered as she stepped back.

"Let's not do this," he said suddenly feeling the tension building in her. "Past is past."

He pulled her back and kissed her longingly on the lips.

"God, I love you Sara. Don't ever doubt that," he whispered.

"Have you eaten?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"We have to work on that," he frowned. "Let's talk about…dinner."

"You're obsessed with food," she chided.

They lay there later on her bed.

"Dinner was good," she said as she yawned.

"Still feeling tired?" he asked.

"It's getting better. Griss, have you talked with your mother…about…you know,"

"Andrew was going to talk with her," he said. "He should be released in a day or so. They're going to stay with me."

"I'm glad," said Sara.

"They could still be there after we marry," he warned.

"I don't mind," she said. "I love spending time with Father Andrew. He's so much like you."

"How?" asked Grissom.

"I don't know why I never…"

She was interrupted by his beeper.

He glanced down at the number. "It's Brass."

Grissom stepped into the next room and called Brass.

"Did you work things out?" asked Brass.

"Yes, I did. We're putting it behind us…not speaking of it again."

"Okay. Is she okay? Nick said she was pretty upset before she left work," said Brass.

"I know. I'm here with her now. She's going to be fine," replied Grissom.

"Get some rest," said Brass.

"No case?"

"Since you're there with her…no. If you had done the wrong thing…most definitely."

Grissom hung up and returned to the bedroom.

She was already asleep.

Grissom spooned his body up next to hers and slept.

Note from author:

Are you keeping up with who said what??? Leave a review.

Take care,

Penny


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty Three:**

He seemed different.

She could not quite put her finger on it but something was definitely different.

Brass showed up one evening just before shift was to end.

"Ready for the rehearsal?" asked Brass.

"I don't need a rehearsal," fussed Sara. "It's Catherine's idea."

"Hey, at least we get a good meal out of it," chuckled Brass.

"I'm still stuffed from lunch," whined Sara. "Grissom insisted I eat…he's become obsessed with this weight issue."

"Weight issue?" asked Brass.

"The doctor said I'm underweight," she complained.

"Sara, that's not good. I don't blame him," replied Brass. "You don't need to be underweight during a pregnancy."

_He's going to become obsessed about this pregnancy thing…_

_If I can't get pregnant, how is he going to react?_

"Sara?"

"Hmmm?"

"You kind of zoned out there for a moment," said Brass.

"I'm sorry. I've been doing that a lot lately," she admitted.

"My wife did that a lot when she was pregnant," remarked Brass.

Sara looked at him odd.

"Hey, you guys heading over to the church?" asked Catherine.

"Uhm yeah," said Sara.

Catherine held up the dress. "I thought I would save you a stop. Isn't it gorgeous?"

"Wow," said Brass.

"I'm not sure I can fit in that," grumbled Sara.

"Yes, you can or you can go on a crash diet for the next two days so it will…"

"No diets for her!" growled Brass.

"What is it with you and Grissom about my weight?" whined Sara.

"You need to gain not lose," replied Grissom as he walked down the hall.

He whistled at the dress.

"Is he supposed to see the dress before the wedding?" asked Sara.

"Yes…he just can't see you the day of the wedding," replied Catherine.

Sara's head tilted in confusion. "Then how are we going to get married?"

"He can't see you before the wedding," clarified Catherine as she rolled her eyes.

"Why do we need a rehearsal?" asked Sara. "I know how to walk down an aisle."

Grissom grinned. "Wear flat shoes."

"Flat shoes won't do," announced Catherine.

Sara huffed.

Grissom recognized Sara's disgruntlement.

"Sara…"

He did not get to finish.

Sara practically yanked him into the nearest room and shut the door.

"She's just trying to help," said Grissom in a low voice.

"I agreed to marry you…not put on a show," she hissed.

"I'll talk with her," offered Grissom.

Sara licked her lips.

"Let's uhm just get married now," she pleaded.

"Now?"

"We're going to the church…let's get married today…we don't need a rehearsal."

"Catherine isn't going to like this…let's do it," he said with a devilish grin.

"Really?" she asked.

"Really…gives you less time to back out," he said as he grabbed her hand and stepped back into the hallway.

Brass and Catherine were still waiting.

"We're getting married…today," announced Grissom.

"But…"

Catherine was interrupted by Sara's hand.

"Everyone is already going to be there…most of them anyway," she said. "I'm going through this charade once…no more."

Sara took her dress from Catherine and stalked off.

"I suggest the two of you starting calling people," chuckled Grissom.

"You're kidding, right?" asked Catherine. She continued to yell at him as he walked down the hall.

Brass chuckled as Catherine fumed.

She pulled out a list from her purse, ripped it in half and shoved it at Brass.

"Start calling!" she yelled as she hurried off.

Grissom hurried out the back door and stopped her just as she was about to drive away.

"Ride with me," said Grissom as he opened her door.

"You're not superstitious about…"

"No, I'm not," he said with a grin. "But let's hurry."

"Worried Catherine will spot us," she snickered.

He ignored the jab as he drove off.

"Thank you for rescuing me…agreeing to do this," smiled Sara.

"Catherine can be a bit obnoxious sometimes," grinned Grissom.

"Sometimes?" chuckled Sara.

"We've not seen that much of each other," said Grissom.

"That's not true," she protested.

"Alone," he clarified. "Ever since Andrew and mom have moved in, we've spent most of our time with them."

"I'm sorry. Your mom seems tired these days. I don't think she really rested much while Father Andrew was in the hospital."

"I've noticed that too," said Grissom. "I'm glad you've been helping out. Just don't overdo it yourself."

"Me? Griss, the anemia is getting better! I'm not tired any more. You're practically force feeding me. You won't even let me work a double. I'm fine…really."

He kissed the palm of her hand.

Greg gawked when he saw the wedding list.

"Heather Kessler is invited?" he asked.

"Grissom's list…not mine," said Catherine.

"Doesn't seem nice…you know…since they have a history…that Sara knows about?" asked Greg.

"Well, Grissom knows about Hank," replied Catherine.

"Did she invite Hank?" asked Greg.

Catherine checked the list.

"No."

"So Heather is going to show up and flaunt that she slept with Grissom while…"

"Heather doesn't flaunt…she's too classy…God I hope Sara looks good in that dress…I wouldn't want my hubby's ex looking better than me on my…Where are you going?" asked Catherine.

Catherine threw up her hands as she grabbed her stuff and headed to the church.

Sara felt a bit uneasy as she slipped on the dress.

"It's a bit snug," said Catherine.

"Are you telling me I'm fat? Cause if you are…"

"Whoa! Let's not overreact! You look good. You look damn good!" smiled Catherine. "All heads will turn when they see you in this dress."

"Am I supposed to be able to breathe in this?" Sara whined as she attempted to make a few adjustments only to have her hand smacked by Catherine.

Brown eyes glared at Catherine but she ignored Sara.

"Don't bother…I've stared down Grissom for too many years for you to think that you could possibly affect me with that look."

Catherine put on the finishing touches and then smiled at her accomplishment.

"You look perfect…even Lady Heather is going to be…"

"Heather?" asked Sara nervously.

"Yeah…she was on the guest list."

"Yes…but she…wouldn't come…would she?" asked Sara.

"She's already here," announced Catherine. "She was talking with Grissom just before I came in here to help."

Sara swallowed.

Catherine eyed her. "Wait. You're jealous? He's marrying you…not her."

Sara slumped down in a chair but Catherine yanked her back up.

"Wrinkles!" she yelled.

"I need air," breathed Sara.

"Okay..."

Catherine glanced around the room and grabbed a magazine.

She began fanning Sara.

Sara frowned.

"It's air!" snapped Catherine. "You…really are…that insecure…about Lady Heather?"

"He uhm slept with her," she barely replied above a whisper.

"Well yeah but…you slept with Hank," offered Catherine.

_Don't remind me…_

"You look green…take a deep breath!" advised Catherine.

"It's not working," Sara whined as she paced back and forth.

"You just need…a drink," said Catherine as she hung out of the room waving her hand wildly at the guys.

Greg appeared.

He tried to lean in and take a look at Sara but was shoved back by Catherine.

Catherine grabbed him by his shirt.

"Go next door to the reception room and bring a bottle of champagne," instructed Catherine.

Greg smiled. "Celebrating early?"

"Just do it!"

Catherine returned with the magazine.

"Here…read this….it will help take your mind off things," said Catherine.

Sara took the magazine and gawked, "How to tell when your man lusts for another woman!"

Catherine and Sara exchanged gawks.

Catherine snatched the magazine back. "Give me that back!"

"Who reads that kind of smut?" asked Sara.

"I must have missed this edition," muttered Catherine.

She quickly flipped through the pages but was interrupted when the door opened and Greg stepped in.

He whistled when he saw Sara.

Sara smiled nervously.

"Give me that!" snarled Catherine as she grabbed the bottle.

She looked at the label.

"Sorry…the bar isn't set up yet…I got this from my car," he confessed.

"You carry liquor in your car?" asked Catherine.

"I won a bet…nice bottle of bourbon!" he said with a grin.

Sara snatched it from Catherine's hand.

Catherine snatched it back.

Sara sulked until she was handed some in a plastic cup.

"One drink won't hurt," said Catherine.

"It's getting a bit crowded out there," said Greg.

"Crowded? Why is it crowded? We're getting married today so there wouldn't be any crowds?" whined Sara.

"I guess everyone we called is coming," smiled Catherine. "Let's just hope we can manage to pull off getting food for the reception at the last minute."

"You called people? Reception? Wait!" yelled Sara.

Catherine filled Sara's glass again.

"Have another drink," offered Catherine.

Greg whispered to Catherine. "She's a bit nervous."

"Lady Heather is here," whispered Catherine.

"So is Hank," smiled Greg.

Sara tossed her cup into the trash.

There was a tap on the door just as Greg left.

Nick stepped inside.

"Mind if I see Sara for a moment?" asked Nick.

"No…in fact, you can keep her company while I check on the reception," said Catherine.

Nick waited until Catherine disappeared.

"Is she driving you nuts yet?" chucked Nick.

"Too late for that," muttered Sara.

Nick grabbed two of the plastic cups and poured each a drink.

"A toast…to the most beautiful and only girl I know that would be appropriate to take home to mom," he declared. "Too bad Grissom finally made a move."

They both chuckled.

Nick cleared his throat, "Seriously, you're going to have your happy ending…it begins today."

Sara glanced down at the cup.

"Drink up…it's tradition," said Nick.

Sara gulped down the contents.

Nick leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "See you later."

Nick returned to the chapel.

"Hey, where did you go?" asked Warrick.

"I just wanted to wish Sara well," said Nick.

Warrick suddenly took off.

He tapped on the door and stuck his head in.

"Mind if I come in?" Warrick asked.

Sara shook her head.

"I just wanted to wish you the best. You're the only woman I thought was right for Grissom."

"Thanks Warrick," she said.

He glanced at the cup. "Celebrating early?"

"Toast," she replied holding up the cup.

Warrick grabbed a cup, filled it and then replenished Sara's despite her protest.

"You won't deny me the honor of giving you a toast?" he teased.

Warrick thought for a moment.

"We may not have seen eye to eye in the beginning but I would never want anyone else to have my back…except you. Be happy Sara. You deserve it."

Sara sniffled.

They both gulped down the bourbon.

Catherine returned.

"I thought I left you with Nick?" she muttered.

Warrick was ushered out of the room.

She cursed when there was a knock at the door.

Brass called out, "Are you decent?"

"Come in," called Catherine.

Brass stared at Sara in the dress.

"You look beautiful!" he beamed.

Sara smiled.

"Ready to get through a wedding?" asked Brass.

Sara nodded.

"Listen, I wanted to prepare you…"

He was interrupted by Catherine.

"She already knows about Heather," said Catherine.

"Hank…is here," said Brass.

"Hank?" asked Sara.

"Yes…"

Brass did not get to finish as Sara headed toward the door but Catherine blocked it.

"Is something wrong with Father Andrew?" asked Sara.

"No! No Sara. Hank came…I'm not sure how or why…I don't remember his name on the list," said Brass.

There was a tap at the door.

"That's my cue…I'll be waiting for you," said Brass as he stepped out of the room.

Sara whirled around, filled her cup and swallowed.

"That's your limit," said Catherine.

Sara did not bother correcting her.

She already felt lightheaded.

Catherine pulled out a breath mint and handed it to her.

"Why is the bottle almost empty?" asked Catherine.

"I don't feel so good," whined Sara.

"Oh shit!" yelled Catherine.

Catherine began waving the magazine in front of Sara's face furiously.

Sara snatched the magazine. "So how do you tell if your man is…"

Catherine heard a tap at the door and she cursed again.

"Stop that!" yelled Sara. "Whoa…I haven't had a rush in…"

"You're not drunk…you're just elated…to be getting married…understand?"

Catherine opened the door and handed Sara to Brass.

"Lord, help us," muttered Catherine.

Sara's arm slipped into his and they slowly began their descent.

The guys turned and smiled as they watched Sara approach.

Once she was beside Grissom, Brass relinquished her arm.

"I love you kiddo," he whispered as he took his place beside Catherine.

She had felt as if she were floating on clouds as she stood there and listened to Father Andrew.

The vows were said.

Their eyes remained locked on one another as they were pronounced man and wife.

He kissed her and she felt a bit lightheaded but then she did not care.

She felt a bit off balance as they kissed.

"I love you Mrs. Grissom," he whispered.

"I love you too," she whispered back.

She flashed her Sidle smile.

She leaned forward and whispered. "There never was any chalk."

He tried to hide the lump in his throat as she caressed his cheek.

She felt odd as she stood there listening to the many congratulations.

She seemed different.

"Sara…are you alright?" asked Father Andrew.

"I'm great…floating actually," smiled Sara.

"You can sit now," whispered Catherine.

Brass and Catherine exchanged glances.

"What's wrong with her?" asked Brass.

"She drank almost a whole bottle of bourbon," whispered Catherine.

"She what!" growled Brass.

Grissom noticed the conversation to the side and he stepped closer.

"What's wrong?" asked Grissom.

"Nothing…Catherine and I are going to take Sara to the reception room," seethed Brass.

"It was only two glasses of bourbon," whined Catherine.

"Bourbon!" yelled Grissom looking back at Sara as she talked with the guys.

Doc was pulled into the small huddle of whispers.

"Is there a problem?" asked Doc to Catherine.

"Grissom is overreacting. Sara had two glasses of bourbon…"

"She's pregnant," seethed Grissom softly.

Catherine and Doc looked shocked.

Catherine threw Brass a dirty look when he did not seem surprised.

"Well, she shouldn't be drinking," said Doc.

Sara stumbled and was caught by Nick.

"Are you okay?" Nick asked.

"The floor moved," she giggled.

Her hand shot to her head.

"Christ!" muttered Grissom.

Grissom quickly made his way to Sara.

"How do you feel?" he asked worriedly.

"I feel…nothing," she smiled. "I can't feel…myself standing."

He grabbed her by the arm and walked her over to the nearest pew.

"Doc!"

There was a mad flurry of accusations as the wedding party followed.

"Give her some air," yelled Doc. "Someone get a wet washcloth!"

"What does he need with a washcloth?" asked Sara as she reached out her hand and ran it down the side of Grissom's face. "I don't even feel your beard!"

"This is more than two glasses…how much?" asked Grissom to Sara.

"It's my wedding…five…I think," she said pulling at Grissom's tie.

"Five shots?" he asked.

"Five glasses," she corrected.

Grissom glared at Catherine.

_Don't yell…._

_Don't yell…_

_Don't…._

"What were you thinking?" Grissom yelled at Sara.

"I know it was a bit much…but…you look good in a suit and tie…do I get to take it off you?"

Greg smirked.

Lady Heather even looked amused.

Father Andrew sat down beside Sara.

"Sara, have you been drinking?" asked Father Andrew.

"Yep!" exclaimed Sara.

She giggled.

Grissom seethed.

"I can't believe I never noticed the resemblance," smiled Sara.

"What is she talking about?" whispered Andrew to Grissom.

Sara leaned in close to the two. "You both have blue eyes, same hair texture, your hands feel the same…father and son…I should have guessed without proving it through some test."

Father Andrew's face lost all expression.

"She doesn't know what she's saying," declared Grissom.

"Of course I do." She whispered to the two. "I never understood why I felt so close to Andrew…he's you…like father like son."

"Let's get some coffee," offered Doc.

"She should have thought about the baby," said Grissom angrily.

"Baby?" asked Father Andrew.

"Sara is pregnant," whispered Grissom to Andrew.

"I'm not pregnant!" yelled Sara.

The room got deathly quiet.

Note from author:

Oh my…it's about to unravel… I've loved the reviews so please continue to leave them.

Take care,

Penny


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four:**

**Note from author:**

**This is a really long chapter....so it's like getting two...**

Grissom tried to pull her up.

Sara jerked her arm away. "I'm not pregnant!"

"Yes, you are," whispered Grissom.

"I may be whoozy but I'm thinking straight. I am not pregnant!"

Grissom looked shocked. "You told Brass…"

"I did not!"

Brass leaned into the conversation. "Kiddo, you were giving hints. I told you I guessed…"

"You thought I meant that I was pregnant? Is that what you told Grissom?" she yelled.

Brass nodded miserably.

Sara grabbed Grissom's hands and yanked him down to the floor.

"I am not pregnant! How could I be pregnant when we've not even…"

Heads leaned in straining to hear the conversation.

"You're not pregnant?" asked Grissom.

"Of course not!"

Grissom seemed relieved and upset at the same time.

Greg tried to inch his way back toward the wedding party but was grabbed by Nick and Warrick.

"Hey!" he whined. "This is better than the Jerry Springer show."

Grissom let out a loud sigh.

"You thought I was pregnant…by someone else?" she whispered.

"I thought…Jim said…I knew we didn't…I blamed myself if you had…you're not pregnant?" he asked.

"No," Sara replied emphatically. "Unless it was done by immaculate conception."

"Then what were you keeping from Grissom? I mean you…" Brass stopped.

Grissom locked eyes with Father Andrew as they stared at one another.

Sara sucked in air.

Mrs. Grissom stepped closer.

"You ran tests…Andrew is my father?" asked Grissom.

Sara's eyes shot from Grissom to Andrew and then to Mrs. Grissom.

Her eyes then shot back to Grissom who looked as if he were about to explode.

"Oh Christ," muttered Brass.

"Sara! Answer me!" ordered Grissom.

She nodded slowly.

Father Andrew gasped as he sat back in the pew.

"Father, are you alright?" asked Sara quickly as she grabbed his wrist.

Father Andrew's eyes stared at Emily's.

By her expression, she had read their lips and knew what had just transpired.

"Emily," called Father Andrew.

Her hand covered her mouth as she shook her head.

Father Andrew reached for Grissom's arm. "Your mother needs you."

Grissom turned and saw the shocked expression on his mother's face.

"Gil, she didn't know," said Father Andrew.

"Did they just say Father Andrew is Grissom's father?" asked Greg.

Nick and Warrick nodded solemnly.

"Whoa…some wedding," whispered Greg. "I can't imagine what they have planned for the reception. This is hard to beat."

Nick and Warrick shot him a dirty look.

Grissom stood quickly and made his way to his mother.

"Mom," he whispered as his hand rested on her arm.

There was a flurry of sign between the two.

Sara and Father Andrew looked at one another.

"You've been keeping this to yourself?" asked Father Andrew.

"I found out by mistake…but then I didn't know what to do…I didn't want to hurt him…you…her…I talked with Jim…he misunderstood. I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Secrets always come out," sighed Father Andrew.

"Grissom loved his father…you loved the priesthood…Emily was guilty for loving you but she was thankful she gave Gerald a child…I didn't know what to do…I uhm…"

Sara felt panic stricken when Father Andrew bowed his head in solemn grief.

Emily's sobs could be heard across the room.

Sara glanced over and saw Grissom holding his mother.

Their eyes met.

His eyes were a dark shade of blue.

She'd faced those eyes before and she knew he was angry.

Sara stood suddenly.

"Stay!" ordered Grissom.

His tone was harsh.

Sara felt a hand on hers and she turned to see that it was Brass.

"I'm sorry Sara. I've made a mess…"

"Not your fault Jim. I should have told him immediately," she said.

"Look, let's give them some time alone," said Brass as he pulled Sara along with him.

Grissom started to protest until his mother increased her wails.

The wedding guests were already in the reception room mingling and whispering among themselves.

There was a small huddle of lab workers who talked in hushed tones about the "pregnancy that never was."

Nick and Warrick listened as the lab workers gossiped about whether it was Sara's ploy to get Grissom to marry her.

"Man, some wedding," whispered Nick shaking his head. "How the hell did this happen?"

"Someone said it was a misunderstanding," replied Warrick. "Some misunderstanding."

They immediately stopped talking when Brass entered the room with Sara.

All heads shot to Sara.

"I need a drink!" Sara said as she tried to move toward the bar.

"That's not going to solve anything…"

She wasn't listening as she grabbed the first drink that appeared on a tray.

She gulped it down.

"Geez, Sara's going to get plastered," muttered Greg.

"I'll go talk with her," said Nick.

Sara glanced across the room and saw Hank approaching.

"Like this couldn't get any worse," breathed Sara.

"Congratulations…I think," said Hank.

"Nice…not…to see you again Hank," replied Sara.

"Look, I told Greg this was a bad idea," said Hank. "But he insisted."

Sara's eyes shot over to Greg.

"He…uhm insisted you come?" asked Sara.

"Yes, he…"

Hank was interrupted by Heather.

"I wanted to congratulate you…where is the groom?" asked Heather.

Sara finished off the glass and grabbed another one.

"This is looking ugly," whispered Catherine to Brass.

"You get Hank and I'll get Heather," whispered Brass.

They started toward them but were caught by Ecklie.

"I don't like rumors but is Sara pregnant?" asked Ecklie.

Brass sighed loudly.

"You're never going to live this down," chuckled Catherine.

"The groom is talking with…his parents," replied Sara to Heather.

"So…are you pregnant or not cause if you are, you shouldn't be sloshing down drinks like that," said Hank.

"I am not pregnant!" seethed Sara.

Hank chuckled. "Reminds me of the time you got pissed off at Grissom and we had a bit too much to drink…remember?"

Sara stared into her empty glass.

_Yes, I remember…._

_I was told Grissom spent the night at Heather's…_

_I got drunk the next night and we slept together…_

Sara turned when a waiter came around with a set of drinks but Nick quickly took her hand and held it.

She pulled her hand from Nick's grasp.

"Yes, I do," she said looking at Heather.

"Don't feel bad…it could have been worse," snickered Hank. "At least you didn't sleep with a dominatrix."

Heather's head shot toward Hank.

Sara retrieved another glass.

She took the drink to her lips. "No, I didn't."

Heather's head shot back to Sara.

"I never had sex with Grissom," said Heather.

Nick and Sara both gawked.

"Wait…Grissom spent the night at your house," said Sara trying to keep her cool.

"We had tea…talked about you…but Grissom was a complete gentleman," replied Heather.

Sara wanted to vomit.

"You never…he never…you talked about me?"

Sara glanced at Hank.

_He didn't have sex with Heather…_

_But I had sex with Hank…_

There was a rush of white lace as she hurried out of the church.

"Oh shit," whispered Nick.

"Where do you think Sara went?" asked Greg.

"I think we better go after her," said Nick.

Greg started to follow when he was told to stay behind to warn Grissom.

Warrick and Nick slipped out of the church while Greg made his way back toward the chapel. He started to walk in when Grissom's glare made him halt.

"It's Sara…she's gone," called out Greg as he made a quick retreat from the room.

Grissom continued to comfort his mother.

Father Andrew stood there beside his son and Emily.

"Go to your wife," demanded Father Andrew.

Grissom cursed.

"Not in church," scolded his mother between sobs.

"This was not Sara's fault," said Father Andrew. "This was mine."

Emily shook her head. "Mine."

"Fine. The two of you can blame yourselves," said Grissom as he slumped down at the edge of the altar.

Mrs. Grissom sat down on the pew.

"That day you came to the hospital for advice…you were asking about Sara…you thought she was pregnant by someone else," said Father Andrew.

"When Brass told me she was pregnant, I didn't know how to react. I knew it wasn't mine."

Father Andrew chuckled.

Grissom's head shot up. "What's so funny?"

"Us. Can you imagine how hard it's been for Sara to know the truth… not want to hurt us with it….we hurt ourselves years ago."

Grissom rubbed his forehead.

"How could you think Sara would betray you?" asked Father Andrew.

"Because I've done nothing but push her away for years. If she did, it was my fault," replied Grissom.

"Sara told you about Hank?" asked Father Andrew.

"That was a long time ago," grumbled Grissom.

"Not to her," explained Father Andrew. "She feels guilt for what she did…she didn't love Hank…she loves you. Remember what I told you about Sara?"

Grissom nodded.

Emily continued to cry as she sat there.

Father Andrew sat down beside her.

He wrapped his arms around her.

"We have a long overdue talk," said Father Andrew. "You need to find Sara."

Grissom knelt down in front of his mother. "Are you going to be okay?"

"I'm sorry," she cried.

"She's going to be fine," said Father Andrew.

"You okay?" asked Grissom.

"Yes, I am," Father Andrew replied as he extended his hand to Grissom.

Grissom leaned forward and embraced him for a moment before leaving.

Grissom stepped out of the church and glanced around.

Brass quickly ran up to him.

"Gil, I'm sorry. I thought she was talking about…"

"I had no idea she drank that much," interrupted Catherine.

Grissom's hand went up in the air.

"Where is she? I was told she left the reception," said Grissom.

"She had a conversation with Hank and Heather," said Catherine glancing at Brass.

"Who invited Hank?" scowled Grissom.

Both of them shrugged their shoulders.

"You never should have invited Heather!" fumed Catherine.

"Heather is a friend," exclaimed Grissom.

"Yeah, well, the rest of us thought you'd slept with her…so did Sara," replied Catherine.

"I knew that," said Grissom.

Brass cursed. "Then why the hell didn't you tell Sara the truth?"

"Because… she slept with Hank…because she thought I slept with Heather," Grissom seethed.

"Ouch! I can imagine how Sara feels now that she knows the truth," said Catherine.

"What do you mean?" asked Grissom.

"Heather admitted she had never slept with you…in front of Hank and Sara," explained Catherine.

Grissom ran his hands through his hair.

"We've got to find her," groaned Grissom.

"I uhm had an officer to go by her apartment," said Brass. "She's not there."

"We drove together…maybe she's walking around," said Grissom.

"In a wedding dress?" asked Catherine. "She shouldn't be hard to spot."

"Where are the guys?" asked Grissom.

Brass and Catherine looked around.

"Their vehicle is gone," said Catherine.

Jim's phone went off.

"Yeah, Warrick. I'll tell him," said Brass.

Brass closed his phone.

"The guys followed Sara. She's in a bar about three blocks from here. Nick is trying to talk with her."

Grissom glared.

Brass glanced at Catherine.

"Gil, don't lose your temper," warned Brass. "She doesn't respond well to…"

"I know my wife!" yelled Grissom.

Heather stepped out of the church.

"So tell me Heather, are you leaving before the bolt of lightning strikes?" chuckled Brass.

"Still frustrated Mr. Brass? I offered to help," purred Heather.

Grissom grabbed Heather by the arm. "Walk with me," he cursed.

"You think that's a good idea?" called Brass.

Grissom continued his pace with Heather.

"I understand you had a conversation with my wife," said Grissom.

"She's very beautiful…she's also very vulnerable," said Heather.

"The conversation…" continued Grissom.

"You want to know how she reacted when she found out we'd never slept together. Did you want her to believe we had?"

"I did not wish to deceive her…I was protecting her…from herself," he seethed.

"Herself?" asked Heather.

"She slept with someone out of retaliation for my spending the night with you," said Grissom.

"I see. You knew she would be hurt if she found out that it was just a misunderstanding," replied Heather.

Heather glanced at Grissom. "Did you intentionally let her think you'd slept with me?"

Grissom said nothing.

Heather grabbed his arm forcing him to stop. "Did you?"

"I wanted her to…get a life…she deserved one."

"But not with you," said Heather. "And yet here you are married."

Grissom sighed. "I thought I could let her go…but then she got involved with…he was beneath her…he used her. She deserved better."

"So you finally decided to act…a little late…tell me how do you feel knowing she gave herself to Hank Pettigrew?" asked Heather.

"How did you know…"

"I saw how he looked at her…he's very much attracted to her," she purred.

Grissom picked up the pace.

The guys watched as Sara sat there in the back of the bar with a bottle.

"Grissom is going to be pissed," whispered Warrick.

"He yelled at her!" snarled Nick. "She shouldn't be drinking this much."

"You tell her," said Warrick. "I've never seen her like this."

Sara poured another glass of Scotch and tilted it up.

Warrick and Nick cringed.

"Sara, you shouldn't be drinking…" began Nick.

"Some wedding," muttered Sara. "So much for happy endings."

Nick glanced at the door in hopes of seeing Grissom any moment.

"I told you so Nicky," sniffled Sara. "I just ruined my own wedding. Did you see the look on Gil's face when I…"

She didn't finish but gulped down the contents of the glass and reached for the bottle but was blocked by Nick.

"You don't want to get drunk on your wedding day," warned Nick.

Sara pushed his hand away. "Too late! Besides, I think I'll be spending it alone."

She poured another glass. "This was my fault!" she cried. "I should have told him as soon as I found out. I had the test results in my pocket but I couldn't bring myself…It was part of the case. I got too personally involved and now the three most important people in my life just…"

Sara's head went down on the table as she began to sob.

Nick rubbed her back as he motioned for Warrick to call again.

"Sara, Grissom is on his way," urged Nick.

"You called!" she accused.

"You need him," whispered Nick.

"He…he…doesn't need me…I hurt him…didn't you see the hurt on his face…when he realized that Andrew is his father…my fault!" she hiccupped. "And…and…I slept with Hank…but…but he didn't sleep with Heather."

She wrestled the bottle from Nick and poured another glass.

Nick grabbed the bottle again and tossed it to Warrick.

"That's enough Sara. You shouldn't drink this much."

Sara laughed through her tears. "My father did. He did all the time. Like father like daughter…isn't that funny!" she choked.

She gulped down the contents in the glass.

She asked for the bottle but Warrick refused to give it to her.

"Bartender!" she yelled.

A burly man appeared.

"I need another bottle," she ordered.

The man glanced at Nick who shook his head.

The bartender disappeared.

"That's no way to treat a lady," said Fred, a man at the bar.

He walked over to the table. "Especially someone as beautiful as you," smiled Fred as he set his own bottle down on the table.

Sara glanced at it as she looked around the table.

"Don't do it honey," said Nick.

"That looks like a wedding dress. Did this guy stand you up at the altar or something?" asked Fred.

Sara flashed the wedding ring. "Married with no husband," she choked.

"That's not true. Grissom is just talking with his…parents," explained Nick.

"Man should be where his woman is," drawled Fred.

"Maybe you should go find yours," said Nick.

Sara swore under her breath when Hank walked in.

"Everybody is looking for you," Hank said glancing at the guys.

"Go away Hank!" Sara yelled.

"Is he the groom?" asked Fred.

"No!" yelled Sara.

Another man left the bar and joined the conversation.

"Kind of overdressed for this place…I could help you…dress down…or better yet undress," offered George.

Hank chuckled.

"That's no way to talk to a lady," yelled Fred as he took a swing at George.

Hank was startled when a fist hit him square in the mouth sending him to the floor.

Sara smirked.

Hank quickly got up but he was soon on the floor again as Fred's fist connected with George knocking the man into Hank.

Sara quickly grabbed the bottle before the guys toppled over the table where Nick and Warrick sat.

Nick and Warrick scrambled out of the way.

Sara turned her back but was surprised when Fred lifted her into his arms.

"Put me down!" yelled Sara.

Warrick and Nick started toward Sara.

Sara was tossed over the man's shoulders.

"Put her down!" yelled Warrick.

"I'm calling the cops!" yelled the bartender.

"I think that's our cue to leave missy," said Fred.

"Fred, put me down now!" demanded Sara.

Warrick and Nick walked toward him but Fred tossed over a nearby table.

They found themselves on the floor with George and Hank.

"I've had enough of this!" yelled Sara as she hit Fred over the head with the bottle.

The four guys on the floor cringed as the bottle broke over Fred's head.

Sara was shocked when the man merely laughed.

"You're a spitfire!" chuckled Fred.

"That's my spitfire!" yelled Grissom as he stepped into the bar with Heather beside him.

"Oh, hey Heather!" smiled Fred.

"Hi Fred," replied Heather. "Could you put Mrs. Grissom down?"

Fred set Sara down.

She quickly stepped back.

Grissom surveyed the room.

"I guess the reception was as successful as the wedding," said Greg, walking in behind them.

He was shoved to the side as two officers rushed in.

"Anybody want to tell me who started this?" asked Officer Reynolds.

"I did," replied Sara.

The officer gawked at her.

"No, she didn't!" yelled Warrick and Nick.

George and Hank scrambled to their feet.

There was a flurry of voices as the officers tried to quiet everyone.

"Shut up!" yelled Brass as he walked in behind Grissom and Heather.

The room got quiet.

"Thank you," said Brass. "Warrick and Nick outside."

They hesitated for a moment but then walked out pulling Greg with them.

"Grissom take your wife," said Brass.

Grissom started toward Sara but Officer Reynolds spoke up. "Wait, she admitted she started the fight."

"Ronnie, let the man take his wife…it's their wedding day," purred Heather.

The officer looked sheepishly at Heather.

Grissom glanced at her. "Is there anyone you don't know?"

Grissom and Heather exchanged smiles.

Sara stepped over the glass and plowed her way through them.

Heather chuckled. "She is a spitfire."

Grissom took off after her.

Sara walked past the guys on the sidewalk and headed back toward the church.

Grissom rushed out.

"She went that way!" pointed Nick.

Grissom took off after her.

Greg chuckled. "Anyone of you guys ever watch the movie, "Runaway Bride?"

"Shut up Greg," said Nick.

"It was a good movie…I saw it with Sara," said Greg.

Warrick and Nick looked at Greg.

"I just hope she doesn't see a Fed Ex truck," chuckled Greg.

Grissom caught up with her after she stopped at the curb as if contemplating returning inside the church or heading across the street.

Grissom grabbed her arm but she jerked it away.

"Stop!" he yelled.

"Leave me alone Grissom," she sniffled, "I just want to forget this entire day."

"Sara, I don't think we'd forget this day if we lived to be a hundred," sighed Grissom.

"I can try," she said as she slipped off the heels and ran across the street barefoot.

Grissom followed.

He stopped when she turned on him.

"Go home!" she yelled.

"Not without you," he said.

She continued walking.

"Sara…stop," he pleaded.

She stopped, slumping down on a park bench.

She wrapped her arms around her legs as she buried her head.

He knew she was crying.

"Sara?"

She stiffened when she heard his voice.

"Some wedding," he said softly sitting down beside her.

He glanced over at her as she kept her face hidden.

"I'm not mad…at you," he said.

"It… doesn't… matter," she sobbed.

"Doesn't it?" he asked. "You're sitting here on a park bench in your wedding dress."

"Seemed more… appropriate than a bar," she sniffled.

He couldn't help but grin.

"I'm sorry you were caught in the middle of this mess…not knowing what to do," he said.

"I shouldn't have let my emotions get in the way. It was part of the evidence. I should have just given it to you," she mourned.

"Yes…but you were also trying to protect us," he countered.

"It doesn't matter," she wailed.

"No, it doesn't…the truth is out. Sara…let's…"

"Go home," she whispered. "I just want to be alone."

"Is that what you really want?" he asked fearfully.

She nodded.

"I'm sorry. I can't do that," he said. "I'm worried about you."

"No need. Not much else left to screw up," she muttered. "My life sucks."

"Do you really feel that way?" he asked.

"You didn't sleep with Heather," she cried.

He slid closer.

"No, I didn't," he admitted.

"You let me believe you did," she said.

"Yes…I did," he admitted.

"Do you know how much that hurt?" she asked.

"Yes, I do. It made you sleep with Hank," he said.

"Why? Why did you do that?" she cried letting the sobs come more forcibly.

"Sara…I wanted you to have a life…I wanted you to be happy," he said. "I couldn't have you…didn't think I deserved you so I tried to push you away."

"I slept with Hank!" she wailed. "He cheated on me…he was already engaged…just used me for kicks…some life, Grissom."

"I know," he whispered. "My fault. I hate Hank. He was beneath you…I knew he was…cheating on you…I saw him one day with her."

His admission brought her up off the bench as she grabbed her shoes and took off.

"Sara!"

She whirled around and faced him.

"You knew?" she barked at him.

"I didn't know how to tell you…you seemed happy but then the accident occurred and I knew you would discover the truth so I excused myself from the case."

"How long?" she asked. "How long did you know?"

"A month," he whispered.

He wasn't prepared to have a shoe thrown at him.

The pointed heel hurt.

She turned and kept on walking.

"Sara, stop," he pleaded as he picked up the shoe and continued after her.

"Go away," she seethed.

"Not until we finish this…once and for all," he said.

She turned and glared at him.

"I have another shoe," she warned.

He grinned.

It was a mistake.

"Sara, don't throw that shoe," he warned.

"Leave me alone!" she shot back.

He stepped forward.

She stepped back.

"I mean it," she said.

"Go ahead!" he said. "How many years did you try to get through to me? How many times did I blow you off? Huh?"

He continued to pursue her. "How many times did I turn you down knowing that with each rejection, I hurt you? You wouldn't stop. You wouldn't give up. Why?"

"Leave me alone," she cried.

"Why?" he yelled at her.

"Because I love you," she sobbed.

"It hurt, didn't it?" he replied. "I hurt you over and over. It made you angry…didn't it?"

"Yes!"

"But you never struck back at me…you hurt yourself…over and over…no more Sara. Angry? Are you angry now that I won't do what you want me to do?"

"Yes!" she cried.

"Then for once, direct your anger at me…not yourself!" he yelled.

GSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSRGSR

Officer Reynolds closed the door of the police car just as he received a dispatch.

He grumbled.

"What's the problem?" asked Brass.

"Just got a call about a domestic fight in the park," said Reynolds.

"It must be a full moon tonight or something," muttered Brass.

"Yeah, well…this couple was dressed in wedding attire," grumbled Reynolds. "Got any ideas who that might be?"

"Oh hell," said Brass. "What was their location?"

They arrived just as Grissom yelled something at Sara.

"Oh this is getting ugly," muttered Brass as the guys joined him in observing the confrontation.

"My money is on Sara!" said Greg.

"Mine too," chimed in Warrick and Nick.

Sara threw the other shoe at him and he groaned when it was a direct hit. He was not prepared for her to pick up a nearby beer bottle and toss it.

The guys cringed.

"Man, what did he say to her? She's pissed," said Greg.

Grissom had no sooner dodged that than she managed to pull another one out of a nearby trash bin.

"Hey, I thought Sara didn't like germs?" asked Nick.

"She's really pissed," muttered Warrick. "You don't think she would…"

The guys cringed once more when she threw the bottle. Grissom managed to block it with his arm.

"That's enough!" he yelled.

"I better break it up," said Officer Reynolds.

Fred and George chuckled in the back seat of the squad car.

"Officer, they've had a really shitty day…couldn't you let them work it out?" asked Brass.

"They're causing a disturbance not to mention littering the sidewalks," complained Reynolds.

"We'll clean everything up," offered Warrick.

"Look, I'm sure it's about over," chimed in Nick.

Sara picked up a stick and threw it at Grissom.

Reynolds pointed at the spectacle.

"If she throws one more thing, I'm going to have to arrest her," he warned.

The guys scrambled toward the couple.

Grissom rubbed his knee.

"That was low," he said.

"Too low…I missed my aim," she glared.

He looked shocked. "That's enough Sara. You've had your fun at the expense of my pain."

"Pain? Do you have any idea what you've put me through all these years?"

"Look, let's go somewhere else…not in public…and talk about this," Grissom offered.

"You go," she said as she turned and started to walk away.

Grissom quickly made his move as he rushed in and grabbed her.

In one swift move, she was tossed over his shoulder.

"Oh hell, now he's done it," muttered Brass. "She's going to kick his…"

"Put me down!" she screamed.

"Sara, stop it!" Grissom yelled as her kicking caused him to lose his balance and they both fell to the ground.

"Stop it both of you!" yelled the guys as they arrived on the scene.

Officer Reynolds heaved. "Mind telling me who started this?"

"I did!" they both announced.

Reynolds rolled his eyes. "That's it! You're both going into the station."

"For what?" yelled the guys.

"Disorderly conduct, disturbing the peace, public littering, being a nuisance, giving marriage a bad name…I'll think of a few more while I…"

He stopped when he saw that Sara was sitting quietly on the ground with her head buried in her wedding dress.

"Is she crying?" Reynolds whispered to Brass.

Brass cursed inwardly.

Grissom gathered Sara into his arms and held her as she cried.

"Look, I ruined their wedding. You see I thought she was trying to tell her husband she was pregnant but she was really trying to tell her husband that Father….never mind…we'll clean up the mess…they'll go home…or I'll shoot them myself…just let them go…please," begged Brass.

Reynolds nodded.

"Let's get out of here," Grissom whispered as he grabbed her hand and forced her up.

She was unsteady on her feet but he pretended not to notice as he assisted her to the car.

They both looked a bit battled.

"I sure hope Grissom didn't rent that tux," muttered Greg.

"Shut up and start cleaning," mumbled Nick.

"You think Cinderella wants her slipper?" asked Greg, holding up one of the shoes.

"Shut up Greg," yelled the guys.

Once inside, Grissom started the vehicle without a word.

She kept her face turned toward the window.

"Mom and Andrew are fine," he assured her.

He glanced at her.

Her head bobbed up and down.

"And you?" she asked without looking at him.

"I'm kind of…I'm not sure," he admitted.

Her head bobbed again.

"How are you?" he asked.

Her head just bobbed.

The next twenty minutes were spent in silence.

Sara's head rested on the window.

Her stomach revolted against the liquor.

She was relieved when the car finally stopped.

They were in a parking garage.

She sat there without moving.

Her door opened and he took her hand. "Come with me."

She followed him through the parking garage and into an elevator. She closed her eyes and leaned against the wall as Grissom stood there eyeing her.

Once the door slid open, Sara felt herself being tugged along.

She followed as he slipped out a room key and slid it through the lock.

Once inside, he shut the door.

"We need to talk," he said as he sat on the bed.

She stood near the door.

"Going to sit down or leave?" he asked.

"What…do…you want?" she asked.

"I want my wife to sit so I can talk with her," he said extending his hand.

She sat down on the bed but kept her eyes on the floor.

"Sara, I'm sorry…I'm so sorry," he said leaning in to kiss her forehead. "I yelled at you. I was angry and hurt…I shouldn't have yelled at you. It was just…a shock," he said.

"I just blurted it out…Father Andrew could have suffered a… your mom looked as if she were going to faint and then there…there…was you."

"THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT," he demanded.

"I should have told you," she cried. "I had the test results in my pocket but…"

"Sara, you didn't want to hurt me…God knows I've hurt you enough," he said.

He wiped her cheeks. "I'm sorry our wedding didn't turn out the way we wanted."

She continued to cry.

"You have to admit it's memorable…wedding…paternity revelation…reception shocker…bar brawl…a fight in the park…almost getting arrested," he smirked.

"This is not funny," she sniffled.

"Yes…yes it is," he smirked again until he was laughing uncontrollably.

Sara sat there and watched him.

"I'm sorry…so sorry…" he couldn't stop laughing. "Give me a moment…or two…"

He continued to laugh.

She sat there with arms folded.

He finally stopped and tried to be serious.

"What do you want to do on our anniversary?" he asked beginning the hysterics all over again.

She sat there and just watched.

He slowly got control of his emotions and stared at her.

"You're not finding this funny?" he asked.

"I've never really heard you laugh before," she admitted.

"I want to thank you for…marrying…me," he got through another bout of laughter.

"Are you finished?" she asked.

He nodded only to shake his head as a smirk escaped his lips.

"I'm sorry about the bar fight," she said.

He tried to hide the snicker.

"I'll try to remember not to make you mad…you clobbered Fred pretty hard," said Grissom.

"I sort of liked him…he hit Hank…I wanted to hit Hank…he's probably going to spend the night in jail," whined Sara.

"I'm sure we can get Brass to help him out," assured Grissom.

His hand caressed her palm.

"You really thought I was pregnant…by someone else," she asked.

He nodded.

"I never slept with anyone…except Hank," she gulped.

"My fault too…not yours," he said firmly.

He kissed her softly on the lips.

"We still have our wedding night," he whispered.

"You uhm still want me?" she asked.

"God Sara, yes!" he breathed as he pulled her onto his lap.

He held her as she clung to him.

His mouth sought hers and he tasted the salty tears.

"Please don't cry," he whispered.

He kissed her again this time deepening the kiss as his hands fumbled with the clasp on the back of the dress. "So beautiful," he whispered. He stood pulling her up with him without breaking the kiss. The zipper gave way and with one tug the dress fell to the floor. His jacket was next followed by the remainder of their clothes.

His hands slid down and rested on her waist as he pulled her taunt against him.

"Thank you for....having faith in me," he whispered. He left a trail of kisses as she melted her body into his. He gently eased her back on the bed and poised himself above her. She was not prepared for his head to dip down and suckle a breast. She moaned driving him mad. He gasped when he felt her hand touch him intimately and he quickly grabbed her wrist pulling her hand above her head. He brought the other to his lips and kissed the palm.

He waited there patiently until she opened her eyes.

Blue eyes twinkled as he gently nudged her legs apart. In one swift movement he was inside her and she moaned from the pleasure. He did not move but waited until her eyes were focused on him before he thrust once more. Her gasps were erotic and her eyes flew open quickly anticipating the next thrust.

It did not come.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you," she replied.

He plunged again and again as she tried to keep up the pace but the sensation was too much and she felt her muscles tighten against him causing her moans to increase until she was calling his name over and over.

One more thrust and they both climaxed together.

He gently placed feathery kisses on her head.

"It was worth the wait," he whispered. "And..the fight."

She tilted her head up and he kissed her fully on the lips.

He still remained inside her and he made no move to withdraw the intimacy. He propped himself up on his elbow in order to stare at her. She grabbed his face between her hands, parting his lips with hers as she drove him mad with her tongue. She grinned when she felt him inside her. She wrapped her leg around his waist causing him to slip even deeper.

They both moaned from the pleasure.

His hand lifted her leg and he drove into her forcibly and she gasped from the sheer pleasure of it. Sara wrapped her other leg around his waist as he continued to thrust deeper and deeper. She pulled him down on top of her as he climaxed. They both lay there panting.

He pulled her across his body as he held her tight.

"Who cares about the wedding," he gasped for air.

His hand caressed her arm.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"Much," she managed to get out.

Her hand caressed a bruise on his chest.

"Did I do that?" she asked.

"Yep….you're certainly a spitfire…but your mine!" he teased.

He rolled over so he was facing her.

"Recovered?" he asked with a boyish grin.

She giggled when she felt his lips on her breast.

"Beard tickles," she laughed.

"That's not the emotion I was seeking," he said. "Do I need to shave?"

"What? I can't laugh? At least I didn't laugh about our wedding from hell," she pouted.

He grinned. "I'll shave it."

"No, I love your beard," she said. "I love the feel of it against my skin…don't shave."

His head dipped down and kissed her gently on her abdomen.

He dipped lower and planted kisses along her thigh and she groaned with pleasure.

Their honeymoon promised a happy ending.

Note from author:

We have one chapter left…gee…wonder what could possibly happen next…and no, I was not intoxicated when I wrote this…bourbon balls wouldn't be such a bad idea….I probably need them right about now. As you can see, this was a very long chapter but I didn't think you would like it if I stopped in the middle of a scuffle…

Take care,

Penny


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty Five:**

He couldn't seem to keep his hands off her as she worked around the house.

She would carry a load of clothes to the bedroom to fold and his hand would sneak out to grab her by the waist forcing her to stop for a kiss or a grope.

She had gotten used to the groping.

No matter where they were, he was clever with the inconspicuous gropes.

She would be sitting at a conference table going over evidence on a case she shared with the unit and his hand would find its way to her thigh.

When they dined, his hand would slowly make its way up her thigh and she would gently grab it before a passionate groan slipped from her lips.

Dinner guests were no hindrance to him as he would place his chair ever so close to hers so his arm rested on hers.

When the conversation began, his hand would leave the chair and rest in her lap for a moment before she had to playfully place it on the table.

His eyes never shifted to her nor did it miss a beat of the conversation.

It was more of a distraction to the others than to them.

He seemed to rely on her emotionally and physically the first month of their marriage.

He had shed a few tears during his conversation with his mother and Father Andrew.

Andrew had been patient, letting him rant the first time or two when they sat down to discuss the specifics of his conception.

He had denied the anger at first but then he felt as if he were betraying the man whom he had called father for nine years.

It was as if he were losing that person all over again as he came to terms with the fact that his biological father was very much alive.

Within three months, Andrew became his legal father when he married Emily.

It was a simple wedding filled with much emotion as the bride and groom each cried through the vows.

Sara stood beside Grissom as he gripped her hand tight.

Once the wedding ended, her hand rested on his back as he stood there and congratulated them.

Her fingers made a circular pattern letting him know she was there.

His eyes darkened when they slipped underneath the jacket causing his skin to tingle when he felt the warmth.

She was becoming a solid rock in his life.

He could not imagine going through a day without touching her.

She rolled over one day and announced she had taken a day off.

It took him completely by surprise.

"I'll uhm call in and take the night off as well," he said as he nibbled on her lips.

"I have plans," she said.

"Plans?" he asked.

"Yes, plans," she announced.

"Plans that don't or can't include me?" he asked sounding hurt.

"Yes."

He rolled over to the edge of the bed and sat up.

"You uhm going to tell me what those plans are?" he asked.

"I'm spending them with someone," she said with a huge smile.

"What are you and Andrew doing?" he asked.

"I'll fix you breakfast," she called over her shoulder.

"You're not going to tell me…are you?" he asked.

"Shower. Breakfast will be ready in fifteen minutes," she called.

The change in his behavior was noticed immediately.

Catherine whispered to Brass as they worked the crime scene.

"Grissom say anything to you why he's so quiet?" asked Catherine.

"His wife has a date," snickered Brass.

"A date?" asked Catherine loudly.

Grissom's head came up briefly before submerging himself into his work.

"That's all she would tell him," chuckled Brass.

"Do you know?" asked Catherine.

"If I did, I'm not about to say," said Brass. "Besides, who would believe me?"

Catherine chuckled. "Got me there."

He stared at the clock until he was sure it had stopped working.

As soon as the shift ended he hurried home but cursed when he found a note letting him know she had been called into work.

He spent the next several hours roaming about the house.

There had been no doubles that kept them apart and now that the first one came, he cursed.

He was surprised when his phone rang and it was Andrew.

"We would like for both of you to come to our home for dinner tomorrow," he asked.

"Did you ask Sara?" asked Grissom.

"I haven't seen Sara," replied Andrew.

"You didn't see Sara today?" asked Grissom.

"No, I didn't," he replied. "Is there something wrong?"

"I'm not sure," grumbled Grissom.

He was a man on a mission as he made his way to the lab only to be told she was in the field.

He grabbed the address from the board and headed there.

He ignored Brass with the other officers as he crossed the yellow tape and stepped into the house.

A woman lay face down, not far from a child's body.

Sara glanced up from the flash of her camera.

"We've been working this domestic abuse case for months now…I guess it's over," she said as she continued to snap away.

"Can I help?" he asked.

"You're not on the clock and we don't need graveyard's assistance," she said as she began to collect evidence.

"I missed you," he said as he stood trying to ignore her tears.

"I'll be home in a few hours," she said. "David is backed up this evening. It will be awhile before he can come and remove the bodies."

"You okay?" he asked stepping closer.

"Yeah…no…I hate these cases," she sniffled. "I'll see you at home. Keep the bed warm."

He didn't want to leave.

He wanted to wrap his arms around her and pull her away from this mess.

He slowly turned and stepped outside.

"Kid took it pretty hard. She thought she had really gotten through to the woman but she decided to stay with the bastard," said Brass as he stared at the police cruiser with the man in it.

"You going to be here until she finishes?" asked Grissom.

"I won't leave her. She's been kind of emotional this evening. You two have a fight?" asked Brass.

"No…but then that's none of your business," said Grissom.

"Like hell it isn't," warned Brass. "I gave her away…to you. That gives me the right to ask."

Grissom grinned. "I'm as clueless as you. I came out here to check on her myself."

"How about you go for coffee," said Brass. "It will give you an excuse to hang around."

Grissom returned with several cups of coffee.

He stood there and waited for her to lift her head.

"Coffee," he offered.

"Thanks," she murmured. "I'd prefer a warm bed when I get home."

"Don't worry. I'll keep you warm," he whispered. "Take a break."

Sara stepped out of the house and sat down on the steps.

He handed her the coffee and she grasped it tightly.

"I brought sandwiches," he offered.

"I could get used to this," she said taking one of the sandwiches.

She nibbled on the sandwich as he sat there beside her.

She leaned against him letting her head drop onto his shoulder.

"You're tired," he sighed.

"Yes, I am," she admitted.

"Andrew invited us to dinner tomorrow at their house," he announced. "Should I accept?"

"That depends on whether we work a double and I get enough sleep after I get home and you insist on knowing where I went today," she said as she pursed her lips.

"You uhm don't have to tell me," he said quietly. "I just need to know you're…we're okay."

"I'll see you at home…in bed," she replied as she leaned over and kissed him.

He felt her hand on his thigh and he jerked from the sensation.

"Warm bed," she ordered.

He grinned as he gathered up the trash and left.

He kept his word as she stepped out of the shower and into the warm sheets beside him.

"You've been lying on my side," she breathed.

"Only way I could keep it warm for you," he teased.

He rolled over and gently turned her face toward him as he kissed her.

"I'm sorry it was a difficult case," he whispered.

She sniffled a few times as he pulled her into his arms and let her cry.

"I'm sorry," she moaned.

"A case hasn't affected you like this in a long time," he said. "I'm worried about you."

"Hormones," she wailed.

"I've lost track of your cycle," he said. "You've been on edge a lot."

"I have not," she pouted.

"Yes…you have," he said. "How many P.M.S days can you have?"

"Plenty!" she said pulling away from him.

"Sara…I didn't mean it," he begged. "You have to admit you've been a bit…"

She glared at him and he decided to stop digging the pit any deeper.

"I missed you," he said slowly inching his way towards her.

"You really think I've been emotional?" she asked.

_Don't answer…_

_It's a trick question…_

_Certain to get you a cold shower…._

"No…yes…" he looked pitiful.

"I can't help it," she sniffled. "I'm afraid you're going to have to put up with it at least for another six months."

"Six months?" he asked.

She rolled over so their faces were mere inches from one another.

"I'm pregnant," she whispered.

He stared at her in disbelief.

"I went to the doctor…because of the hormones…mood swings…constant bouts of tears," she said.

"You're pregnant?" he asked.

She nodded.

He grasped her face with his hands and kissed her.

"You're three months pregnant?" he asked.

"Yeah," she smiled.

She handed him the small ultrasound photo.

He quickly rose, turning on the bedside light and grabbing his reading glasses.

He stared at it intently.

"Gil?"

"Hmmm?"

"It's a girl," she whispered.

He smiled.

"You didn't want a boy?" she asked.

"I just want a child…with you," he said as he pulled her into his arms.

"I thought we could let Jim tell the others…since he sort of told them six months ago," she joked.

"I'm sure he'll be honored," chuckled Grissom. "Let's have everyone over for dinner tomorrow….including mom and Andrew."

Sara yawned. "I'll let you call everyone," she said as she slipped under the covers and slept.

They gathered around the pizza boxes as Greg searched for another piece.

"Greg, aren't you full yet?" asked Catherine.

"I've only had four slices," he whined.

Sara carried out another pizza box and plopped it down on the table.

There was a mad frenzy as hands grabbed for the slices.

"You're such a great cook," chuckled Greg.

Sara yanked the pizza slice from his hand and took a bite. "Yes, I am," she declared.

Nick and Warrick chuckled as Greg shuffled through the box in search of another piece.

When he came up empty, he frowned.

"There's another box," said Grissom. "Check the kitchen."

Greg jumped up and hurried after it.

Once the pizza was eaten, they sat there quietly.

"I'm glad all of you could come," said Grissom. "We've been meaning to do this ever since we were married but there always seemed to be some obstacle."

"Since we're all gathered here, I wanted to take this opportunity to make a special announcement," said Brass as he beamed.

All eyes shot to Brass.

"Sara is pregnant…and I have the pregnancy statement this time to prove it!" he announced holding up a slip of paper.

Andrew wiped at his eyes as he pulled her away from Grissom and held her.

"Thank you," Andrew said kissing her on the forehead. "I may not have gotten to be much of a father but perhaps I can make up for it as a grandfather."

Mrs. Grissom hugged Grissom and then Sara.

She and Sara spent the next several minutes signing to one another.

"What are they saying?" asked Catherine.

"My mother says she hopes the baby looks like Sara…rather than me…I was an…ugly baby," Grissom frowned.

They laughed.

"What did Sara say?" asked Nick.

"She said…" Grissom did not finish but stared at Sara.

"What did she say?" asked Greg.

"She uhm said it was a boy," replied Grissom.

There were more congratulations as the gang talked about babies.

Grissom stared at Sara.

She smiled.

He quickly signed to her. _"You told me it was a girl."_

Sara replied in sign. _"It is."_

Greg caught the conversation.

"Is this their way of arguing in front of us so we won't know what's being said?" asked Greg.

"I've picked up a little sign," said Warrick.

They looked at Warrick.

"It seems to be a question about the baby's gender. Sara told Grissom it was a girl but she told Mrs. Grissom it was a boy."

"So which is it?" asked Nick. "Girl or boy?"

Sara pulled out the ultrasound photos and held them in her hand. "Both."

She flashed her Sidle smile at Grissom.

Grissom looked shocked but then returned the smile.

"It was Jim's idea," said Sara.

Grissom glanced at Brass.

"He knew before me?" asked Grissom.

"He insisted I go to the doctor…he confronted me with the mood swings before you," she declared.

Grissom crossed the room and held her.

He whispered softly in her ear. "Thank you for having faith in me."

"Thank you for giving me faith in happy endings," replied Sara.

Grissom felt a hand on his shoulder and he smiled when he saw Andrew swipe at his eyes.

"I'm happy for you, son," he said.

"Thanks…dad."

The End.

Note from author:

I hope you enjoyed the story. I am off to a basketball tournament this weekend but once I return and get settled, I will begin posting the Christmas story…I think you're going to like it.

Take care,

Penny


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